Catacombs

Nu!

(man singing “Ave Maria")

Ciao.

Hello?

Excuse me.

Do you speak English?

Well now, I speak English, French, Italian, German, Spanish...

and Latin I keep on this hand, 'cause I don't speak that so well.

Are you lost, then?

: I don't think so.

Is this the Abbey of Saint Peter?

: Yes.

Good.

Then you can tell me where I might find the Brother Superior.

Well, why would you be wanting him?

Ms. Magrino. Hello.

I am the Brother Superior.

Brother Orsini.

Welcome to our modest abbey.

: Brother Timothy here will show you

to our guest quarters.

Will she be staying, then?

For a few days.

Ms. Magrino teaches school in a parish in America

which is headed by my very dear old friend,

Father Lentini.

It amazes me how that sly old devil became a priest.

It proves that God does work miracles.

Now after you've settled in,

I'll take you down into the catacombs.

: We'll start off with a big bang.

Brother Marinus.

You startled me.

I am distressed.

Well, that's at least consistent.

This is a brotherhood,

not a hotel for lost women.

Our guest is not lost.

She's here at my invitation.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I have a very important appointment...

with my flower garden.

Oh, well. Poor Father John.

It's not much. We're a poor abbey.

It'll be just fine. Thank you.

Is there a reason why you speak so many languages?

Yes, well, now,

it's rather like the Catholic Foreign Legion around here.

The brothers come from all parts of the world

to do their studies.

I see.

Well, now, I must go back to work.

If you need anything at all,

just ask for Brother Timothy.

Thank you.

By any chance...

would you have any American gum to spare?

Sorry.

American gum is such a nice bad habit of mine,

but it's hard to find sometimes.

- See you later, then. - Bye.

(whispering and evil laughter)

: John.

- John. - Why do you want me?

Well, Brother Martina,

here I am back in the tower with all the booty,

and I even bought some batteries for Brother Agostino's radio,

which he doesn't hide too well.

And I also managed...

to procure a Pope's skull

just like the one in Brother Orsini's office.

Which Pope is yours?

Why, Pope Paul VIII, of course.

That's impossible.

The one in Brother Orsini's office

is the skull of Pope Paul VIII.

50 what's your problem?

How can there be two skulls of the same pope?

Why, bless you. It's perfectly simple.

The pope skull in Brother Orsini's office

belonged to Pope Paul VIII when he was an 86-year-old man.

And mine is of Pope Paul VIII when he was only 65.

Oh, I see.

Brother Marina.

Sometimes you are as slow as you are short.

: Come in.

Brother Terrell, I cooked your meal.

- What's the score? - 4 to 3.

The Germans are good.

They cheat.

A brother shouldn't say things like that.

I'm dying.

I can say what I want.

Time to eat.

I'm not hungry.

Keep reading.

The Lord's kindness is everlasting

to those who fear Him.

He pardons all your iniquities.

He heals all your ills.

Now back to the good stuff.

Brother Terrell?

Brother Terrell?

What's wrong?

I thought you were...

I'm sorry, Brother Terrell.

I have to go. I have to go.

We'll finish later.

I'm the one dying.

What is he in such a snit about?

Well, well, well, our visitor from America.

- Hello again. - Taking a stroll, are you?

Yes.

This is my friend Antonia.

- Hello. - Bongiorno.

I rather adopted her a long time ago,

or perhaps she adopted me.

I'm not quite sure which.

Anyway, we've become good friends.

The farmers around here call these Devil's Touch flowers.

You see this mark? This right there?

The farmers claim these have been touched by the Devil.

Oh, they're a very superstitious lot.

But I am fond of one of their sayings.

The Devil can touch you and leave his mark...

just so long as he doesn't steal your soul.

Quite true, don't you think?

What are you checking on there?

Poor child.

She knows things.

Before they happen.

She seems to know.

It's a terrible burden.

She just told me someone's going to die today.

Incredible. What is the connection?

“The light of God is with you."

“The light of God protects you."

“The light of God shall destroy Satan."

Blind.