Smoke Over London (Fumo di Londra)

- Can you see daddy? - No, I can't see anything.

But it should work. Try again.

There they are, my two children, Teresa and Carluccio.

They're looking at me with a telescope.

Can you see inside?

What's dad doing?

- I can't focus. - Can you see him or not?

Yes.

- Let me see. - I'll send him a kiss.

I shouldn't have let him leave, he shouldn't have left.

Lady Anna, it wasn't possible any more, that a man as refined as him,

such an expert in his field, couldn't go on living

without ever having been to England at least once, right?

It's all your fault, Count Paul, and those vagabond friends of yours.

You spend all day talking about umbrellas and bowler hats.

You talk and talk...

I can't hear what my wife is saying to my best friend, Count Paul,

but I can guess.

My wife is a good woman, simple, but also a little ignorant.

I am an expert antiques dealer.

I couldn't go on living without ever going to England.

The country we men of refinement consider our second home.

Nevertheless, now that this huge beast has started moving

and I can no longer see my wife and children,

I really feel like getting off!

And I don't know why!

He's scared, I tell you, he's scared.

If he could, he'd jump out of there like a cricket.

At this this time, there can be no place

in Dante's soul for a lowly and childish sensation

like fear.

There he goes.

In an hour and fifty minutes

our Dante will set foot on our dear old England.

Let's go. Come on, we have to get to Perugia.

Start walking.

British passengers to the right, foreign passengers, this way.

- Are you separating us? - Yes.

All mine.

We're taking these.

You're only allowed one carton and one bottle.

I'm so sorry! It's my first time in England.

I don't know your laws, but I have the greatest admiration for you.

- Then open everything. - Everything?

Everything.

I didn't realize.

I told the driver 49 Park Lane.

This is 49 Park Lane.

But this can't be the little Queen's hotel.

It was here 20 years ago.

Now we have the London Hilton.

- This way, Sir. - How strange.

- This is your room, sir. - Yes, I can see.

No, never mind. I prefer to do it myself.

- I'm not unpacking your suitcase. - No? Then what are you doing?

I must check for cameras and binoculars.

- Why? - Do you see down there?

- The palace where the queen lives? - Yes, this is why.

- Now do you understand? - No, I don't understand.

Journalists and photographers, with their equipment

have invaded the Queen's privacy.

Criticising and publishing, without any respect,

images that were less than flattering for such individuals.

- Her Majesty wasn't amused. - She's right, poor lady.

But why did the owner of this land build a skyscraper right here?

The land belonged to the Queen, she gave permission to build it.

- Then why is she complaining? - That's what we're wondering as well.

You deserve a tip.

Your welcome.

What a wonderful world.

Dante Fontana - Antiques.

Hello? Hello?

Who?

Mr. Dante? From London?

How is that possible?

They're still not back, maybe because of the fog.

No.

I had such a fright when I heard your voice.

I'll take care of it, don't worry.

- Your husband just called. - How is that possible?

- I told you he'd get there first. - He was surprised you weren't back.

He asked about you and your friends.

When I told him about the fog here, he laughed and said:

"It's sunny over here, I can even see the Queen from my window".

- Let's go. Bring me the key later. - Yes, madam.

Did he speak English? Had he already changed?

These are the things you put in his head.

- "He can see the Queen." - Poor Dante.

Don't worry about Anna, it's just the way she is...

She always wants the last word. What can you do?

She's no different to before, she hasn't changed.

- She's so set in her ways. - A drink?

I can't imagine what Dante must be up to now.

I can tell you where he is now.

Only a few minutes till noon. Where else can he be?

St. James' Street.

Stand next to the guy in the bowler hat

otherwise they won't believe we're in London.

Next to him.

I'm sorry, mister, just a moment.

- Italians? From the south? - Yes, sir.

Ready?

Behave.

Don't show us up for what we really are.

Who is he?

It got caught... my umbrella.

The ticket.

Are you Italian?

- Yes, I'm Italian. - I don't like Italians.

Why?

An Italian tried to strangle me during the war.

With that neck?

Who was this Italian?

Where can I find a good restaurant?

All the restaurants are good around here.

But they're all Italian!

Well...

I'm Italian and I'm tired of Italian food.

Please, tell me where I can find a typical English restaurant.

- To do what? - To eat.

We have fresh clams in oil straight from the sea.

What would you like, ma'am?

Something I'd been dreaming of all my life. Visiting Christie's.

The most famous auction house in the world.

My dream was about to come true.

Congratulations.

Do you think I paid too much for that?

I don't know much about the period.

Modest and cautious!

Two virtues I lack!

But you must have many others.

- I wouldn't know, Mister... - Fontana.

Fontana?

- Then you're Italian? - From Perugia.

I have so many happy memories of your city.

Many years ago, in Warsaw

I met a marquis Fontana, in your embassy.

A relative of yours, perhaps?

- He was my uncle. - Was?

I'm so sorry.

I realised straight away that you weren't an antiques dealer.

My niece Lady Rachel and Baroness Charlotte Swinburn.

The Marquis of Fontana.

- What interests you in particular? - Something special?

In this auction? Or in life in general?

- Very witty. - Very wary too.

Yes, look. 136...

Bust of a woman, fragment of Etruscan sculpture.

No, it's deplorable.

What did I say?

I hope you're happy.

Your little whim has cost me an extra £300.

It wasn't a whim, I came here from Italy for that fragment.

I've been looking for it for years, I own the rest of the pieces of the urn.

You're obviously talking about a copy, I own the original.

I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I own the original.

Rubbish, my father found it in a newly discovered Etruscan tomb.

He was passionate about Etruscan art.

Newly discovered Etruscan tombs are very rare.

My father was a specialist.

If he was a specialist, my father certainly wasn't naive.

- I'm not questioning that but... - Are you sure you have the original?

How long are you staying in London?

- I leave tomorrow. - What a pity.

I have guests coming to my castle tomorrow

and my painter of seasons is going fox hunting.

I would love to have invited you

to show you that experts like you and your father can be wrong.

Then I accept your invitation without hesitation.

I'm really delighted!

We'll be expecting you tomorrow at Belvoir Castle.

And if my piece is a fake, I shall give you a nice reward.

Your invitation is a reward in itself!

- See you tomorrow. - Yes.

Don't forget: Grantham Belvoir Castle.

There's a train that arrives at ten in the morning.

My driver will be waiting for you at the station.

Grantham Belvoir Castle.

It seemed too good to be true.

An English duchess had invited me to her English castle.

I was scared it was all a dream and I'd wake up in Perugia.

These children start wearing top hats at primary school.

That's why they know how to wear them when they grow up.

That's why they're so well-educated.

There's so much talk about school reform in Italy.

Here's the first and most important one, the top hat.

We are missing the top hat in Italy.

And these girls...

With such deep and pure eyes.

- Are you alone? - Yes, why?

We were expecting an Italian guest.

- Are you expecting anyone else? - An Italian, but I don't see him.

He was supposed to be on this train.

He must have missed it. Italians are never on time.

Too right!

Shall we go then, Miss Elizabeth?

Of course! What's the point of waiting?

Is Belvoir Castle very far?

You're Italian? You look like a real Englishman.

- What a wonderful compliment. - Not really, the car's already left.