The School of Rock

Never thought that I'd be fighting you.

But you stole my heart You cheated and lied.

You weren't in my corner You weren't on my side.

The gloves are off.

You hit below the belt.

Now it's timeout, baby And they've rung the bell.

I'm not a fighter, I'm a lover.

But if you run, then run for cover.

Fight for your love Yeah.

When it's round two, girl.

Turn this up! Now! Good.

I get a knockout punch.

With this heartfelt song.

I know when I count you down from 10

I'll find you in my loving arms again.

The gloves are off You hit below the belt.

Now it's timeout, baby And they've rung the bell.

I'm not a fighter, I'm a lover.

But if you run, then run for cover.

Fight for your love Yeah.

I'm not a fighter, I'm a lover.

But if you run, then run for cover.

Fight for your love Yeah.

Whoa, nobody caught me. That was lame.

I don't think he's moving.

He is a lazy freeloader and it's time for all this dysfunction to stop.

Can't we just do this later?

I mean, you know how he gets in the morning.

Ned, aren't you tired of letting people push you around?

Yes.

Then get in there and do it.

What? What is it?

Dewey, hey, it's the first of the month, and

I'd like your share of the rent now.

Man, you know I don't have it.

You wake me up for that? Come on, man!

Sorry.

Dewey, I mean, you owe me a lot of money as it is.

Yeah, try $2,200.

Okay, you guys,

the band is about to hit it big time. We'll win Battle of the Bands.

When I'm rolling in Benjamins, I'll throw you and your dog a bone. Good night.

- Your band has never made two cents. - Patty, come on, I'm on this.

Oh, you're on this? You're on this? He's walking all over you.

Mommy, could we please talk about this later?

No, we can't talk about it later because we have to go to work.

We have jobs. We contribute to society. All right?

I am an assistant to the mayor of the city. "Hello!"

What? Can you get her out of here, please? Why? Why her?

And Ned has the most important job there is.

Temping?

- He's a babysitter. - Think it's so easy?

I'd like to see you try. You wouldn't last a day.

Dude, I service society by rocking.

I'm out there liberating people with my music.

Rocking ain't no walk in the park, lady.

All right, this is useless, all right?

Tell him if he doesn't come up with the rent by the end of the week,

he's out of here.

Dewey, I'm not paying your share of the rent, so

maybe you should sell one of your guitars or something.

What?

Would you tell Picasso to sell his guitars?

Oh, my God. He's an idiot.

Dude, I've been mooching off you for years

and it was never a problem until she showed up. Dump her.

If you don't come up with some money, she'll dump me.

Really? That would be good. She's a nightmare.

Come on. I may never have another girlfriend.

I mean, just come on. Come up with some money, please. Please.

Okay. For you. Not for her, man. For you.

Thank you.

Heal me I'm heartsick.

D minor.

I'm hungry And A minor, G, on you.

Heal my heart.

Hey! What's up?

Is that a new song? Who's this guy?

We're taking the Battle of the Bands seriously this year.

Good, because I need the money. Now, listen.

If we're gonna win this thing, we gotta actually start playing some music.

I agree. You're fired.

Your lyrics, now don't take this the wrong way, Theo, are lame.

But I've been sitting on some awesome material, so...

Did you hear what I said?

We voted.

You're out.

This is Spider. He's replacing you.

What's up, dog?

I was gonna tell you last night, but you passed out, man.

You're gonna kick me out of the band? You're gonna fire me?

- It's my band. I brought us together. - Theo wanted you out.

- There's nothing I could do. - Shut up, man. You voted him out, too.

Dewey, listen to me.

You're a good guitar player,

but it's the 20-minute solos, it's the stage dives.

We're trying to land a record deal here, man, and you're an embarrassment.

Read between the lines, Theo.

Read between the lines!

Dewey, man, I hope this doesn't come between us.

Like, I care about you, man.

You guys, you know what? You're nuts. You're all nuts.

You've been focused so hard on making it, you forgot about one thing.

It's called the music. And I don't even care. You know what? So what.

I don't wanna hang out with wannabe corporate sell-outs.

I'm gonna form my own band. We're gonna start a revolution.

And you're gonna be a funny little footnote on my epic ass.

I feel sorry for you guys.

Yes.

Yeah, it's a 1968 Gibson SG, mint con dish.

No.

That's all? Well, that's a mistake.

No, Hendrix played this guitar.

Hello?

- Yeah? - Is this Mr Schneebly?

No, he's not here.

- Could you take a message for me? - Yeah.

Hi. My name's Rosalie Mullins.

I'm the principal at Horace Green Prep. We're having a little emergency.

One of our teachers broke her leg this morning.

Pat Wickam at Milton Prep recommended I call Mr Schneebly.

Do you know if he's available?

- How long is the gig? - Excuse me?

How long is the job?

As much as a few weeks,

but we need somebody to start immediately.

So how much are we talking here?

Now, do you know when Mr Schneebly will be back?

Hold on a sec. Oh, you know what?

I think he's just coming in right... Ned, phone!

Hello, this is Ned Schneebly.

Pat faxed me your résumé. It's very impressive.

We've never been in a bind like this before, so thank you so much.

So how's this gonna work? Are you gonna pay me up front?

I don't understand.

It'd be really great if I could get paid in cash.

Oh, well, we don't do that.

When you cut my cheque, make it payable to Dewey Finn, for tax reasons.

You can discuss all of that with Candace at the end of the day.

When's the end of the day?

We commence at 8.15, school lets out at 3.00.

You know what?

Do you think I could cut out a little early today? I got some stuff I gotta do.

It's cool. I can stay.

Mr Schneebly,

this is considered the best elementary school in the state,

and we maintain that by adhering to a strict code of conduct,

faculty included.

Don't worry about me. I'm a hard-ass.

If a kid gets out of line, I got no problem smacking him.

No, no. We don't use corporal punishment here.

Okay, so just verbal abuse?

If you have any problems with any students, send them to me.

- I will do the disciplining. - Check.

Children.

Please take your seats.

This is Mr Schneebly.

Why don't you write your name on the board?

Yes, I will.

You know what? Why don't you all just call me Mr S?

Mr S has never taught here at Horace Green,

so I want you all to be on your best behaviour.

So the curriculum is on the desk.

- And do you have any questions? - Yeah, when's lunch?

The children just had their lunch.

Is there anything else you need?

I'm a teacher. All I need are minds for moulding.

All right, then. Well, thanks again. You saved the day.

Okay, who's got food in here?

You're not gonna get in trouble. I'm hungry.

You. What do you got?

That's what I'm talking about.

Okay. Teach. Teach. Teach.

All right, look, here's the deal.

I've got a hangover. Who knows what that means?

- Doesn't that mean you're drunk? - No. It means I was drunk yesterday.

- It means you're an alcoholic. - Wrong.

You wouldn't come to work hung-over unless you were.

Dude, you got a disease.

- What's your name? - Freddy Jones.

Freddy Jones, shut up.

Shut up.

The point is, you all can just chill today.

We'll start on this crapola tomorrow.

- Yes, Tinker Bell? - Summer.

As class factotum, first I'd like to just say welcome to Horace Green.

- Thank you. - Any questions about our schedule?

Because usually now Miss Dunham teaches vocabulary,

then gives us a pop quiz, then splits us up into reading groups.

- Track B is... - Okay, hey, hey, hey.

Miss Dumbum ain't your teacher today, I am.

And I got a headache and the runs.

So I say time for recess.

But, Mr S, that poster charts everyone's performance.

We get stars when we master the material covered.

How do we get gold stars if we just have recess?

- What are these black dots here? - Demerits.

What kind of a sick school is this?

As long as I'm here, there will be no grades or gold stars or demerits.

We're gonna have recess all the time.