Life & Beth

Whoa-ho! Woo!

Johnny Bear! Aw. How you doin'?

- Ma, I have to wash my hands. - Go ahead.

Dinner's ready. Have a seat when you're done.

Okay.

- I saw you riding your bike out the window.

You were going a million miles per hour.

I wasn't going that fast.

- How far'd you go? - Just to the creek.

- Just to the creek? - That's almost 10 miles away.

Do you know that?

You should ride in the Tour de France. Yes!

Seriously?

- I have never seen someone as good as you are at your age.

As good as what?

- Just riding his bike. I was just saying how great he is.

Yeah, I saw, your bike outside.

The chain is on wrong.

No, it's not.

Num-num.

Soup's gonna be good.

I kinda wanna talk to you about something.

Soup's gonna be good.

Alright.

This is an early prototype. - Whoa.

Thank you.

Okay.

- It's really good. - Yeah? You think it's spicy?

Hey, John, Beth.

- Hi. - Hey, did you harvest that watercress?

Yes, and your boat's fine.

- It smells really good. - Want some soup?

It's delicious.

Shit, can't.

Have to run and play some pickleball with some friends.

You guys wanna join?

- Um, we can't. We have to-- - We can,

but we don't want to. Beth and I both think that pickleball is stupid.

It's an embarrassment to the game of tennis.

Okay. Um, yeah.

Watercress is up in the main kitchen. Bye, guys.

- See ya later. - Bye.

See ya.

John.

- Did you see that dogwood out front? It's startin' to bloom.

You know, a lotta people don't realize that its fruit is edible.

- You didn't have to say all that to Skyler.

I was gonna make something up to be nice.

Is it nice to lie?

Sometimes.

Soup's gonna be good.

Pharmacy department, how may I help you?

- Hey, LaVar. - Ha, Beth!

What has you callin' me mid-shift

at this soul-crushin' chain

that threatens my mental health every day?

What do you want?

Well, I just, ya know, wanted to

say hi and actually, um, check in with you about

this new, drug commercial.

It was for

I wanna say migraines.

It's, like, Soltrex?

- That is the worst fake drug name I've ever heard. What do you want?

Okay, well,

I know your son has Asperger's, right?

Asperger was a doctor

who was canceled for havin' Nazi ties.

The correct name is Autism Spectrum Disorder.

ASD. Not today, Douyon.

- Well, what day then? - No days!

Is this about John? Is this why you callin'?

- Um-- - This is why I love my son.

The same reason you love John.

It's because they say what they damn mean.

Now, quit wastin' my time,

and call my wife and get some phone numbers.

Thank you.

- Hey, LaVar! - Hey, Jen!

That was just Beth on the phone.

- Aw, that's nice. - Wow.

Another hydrocodone? Is it from that bowlin' injury?

- Right? You thought I'd be better by now, right?

It's really frustrating.

- It's pretty interesting. Yeah. - Yeah. Nice to see you, too.

- I'm gonna take a loop. - Hey, good to see you.

Always!

Okay, bye-bye.

Do you have photographs of the damage--

- Yes, he has photos. - ...is my question. May I see them?

He has photos of the damage.

- I also have pictures of my ferrets if you'd like to see them.

- I don't care to see pictures. I know what ferrets look like.

This show is lawless.

And Brandon here is the one that took the pictures.

Listen--

Shit. The cable's doing it again.

You can basically see what's happening.

No, I'm gonna call the cable company.

I can take care of it.

- Really? - Definitely.

It's just a poor connection.

Simple fix.

Yeah, I don't know.

- Well, would you rather pay somebody to come here 10 days from now,

four hours later than they said, and charge you $3,500 for it?

- Yeah. - I got it.

I'm not gonna get electrocuted or anything.

Okay. No. Nope. This doesn't feel safe.

- It's not that high. I go into higher trees all the time.

- Well, can you stop? C-- I-- - It'll be quick.

M-May I implore you

that we just get someone over here

that does this for their living? - Why don't you believe in me?

- This is-- - You're not a cable guy!

I've had Terry for five,

six months at a time.

- You can at least see what's going on now.

This guy wants joint custody over this woman's dog or dad.

Yeah.

It's chilly in here.

You cold? You want a sweatshirt?

I'm fine.

Larry needs to get a new dog and a life.

May I ask you a question?

Okay.

And you can, like, 100% say no

...to this. - Okay.

Okay, so,

...um,

what I'm wondering is just are you interested,

or,

...in learning more about your brain?

Yeah, sure.

In what way?

- There are these online tests where you can find out

if you're, like, maybe on, on the

Autism spectrum or whatever.

Do you think I'm autistic?

Maybe. I,

I don't know. I just think it could be helpful for us to know.

You know, for you or for us.

Like, th-there's these online tests.

They're by no means a way of getting diagnosed.

They're just, you know, could give us a general sense

of if we even wanna pursue it.

Cool. Okay, let's do it.

- Yeah? O-Okay. Um. - Yeah.

Okay. Okay.

"I tend to get fixated on tasks.

Strongly agree, somewhat agree, somewhat disagree, strongly disagree."

Is that a bad thing?

If you have something to do, isn't it good to work hard?

- Yeah. Yeah, and it's not bad or good. It's just-- It's a thing. It's just

...a question, you know?

- "Sometimes people say I am being rude even though I think I am being polite."

I guess. I mean.

Yeah, like the Skyler

pickleball thing, maybe.

I wasn't trying to be rude, though.

- Yeah, I-I think that's sort of the point of this question--

- I could just as easily say that you were being rude because you were going to lie.

That's fair. Here. Okay.

This is asking if you have trouble regulating temperature.

That's... a strongly agree, right?

If I'm comfortable.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

U-U-Um, I'm gonna give you space.

I don't wanna influence--

Just answer the questions however you, however you want.

Ya know? Or-Or if, if you wanna, ya know, just bail, that's cool.

W-- And let's-- Should we just do that and shut the computer

and, like... go get Skittles and... Charleston Chews or whatever?

Just-- - It's okay. I'm okay.

Okay. Okay. I love you.

- I love you. - Okay.

You want salmon for dinner?

- Sure. - Okay.

I'll do some asparagus, too.

John, what did the test say?

It says I probably have it.

How can I help you?

- I'm here to be assessed for possible Autism. John Wallace.

Are-Are you sure?

I have an appointment.

- Hi. John? Hi. - Yes. Hi.

- And you're just gonna fill out this questionnaire.

- Okay. - Okay?

Sorry everything is so small.

We work with children.

There is an adult-sized chair right over there.

That was my idea, so. - Thank you.

- If it was a childhood... like, assessment place,

then why did you stay?

Well, it wasn't all bad. I mean,

it was sorta like the online test, but just maybe geared more toward kids.

They asked me about what I like to play. I said basketball.

Lots of adults play basketball, so that seemed fine.

- Yeah. - They asked about family.

What'd you say about family?