It Runs in the Family

Look over my right shoulder.

Good.

Look over my leFT shoulder.

Very good.

You know. Mr. Gromberg...

you're not going to want to hear this...

but for a man of your age...

less than a year after a stroke. You are in remarkable shape.

Well. My damn ticker.

Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom... a mile a minute.

Well. Your cardiogram showed no abnormalities.

Blood pressure... high?

Your blood pressure? Better than mine.

How about my liver?

Your liver's holding up perfectly.

- Kidneys? - Fine.

- What about this? - What?

What. This?

That's dry skin. Mr. Gromberg. It's not cancer.

- Say. "Ah." - Ah.

So. Are you still seeing your speech therapist?

No. She talks worse than I do.

Well. I hate to tell you this. Mr. Gromberg...

but it looks like you still have a few good years leFT.

"A few good years."

How do you know? Do you talk to the man upstairs?

Hey. Gromberg. What's that supposed to be?

- A sensei. - A what?

A sensei. A karate sensei.

Yeah? Has your karate guy ever seen a pair of these before?

Morning. Everyone. I'd like you to join me in welcoming back...

your classmate Abigail Staley.

Most of you have known her since kindergarten.

Is there something you'd care to share with us. Gentlemen?

So. No matter what you've heard...

over the last couple of months...

I know that you will be kind and considerate.

Isn't that right. Mr. Cooper?

Abby.

What the hell are you looking at?

What the hell are you looking at?

Gromberg. I am going to have...

the red-lined martine agreement...

in time for the meeting. Aren't I?

I am working on it as we speak. Barney.

- Just checking. - Sure thing.

Asshole.

- Alex? - Yeah.

I have your wife on line two.

What time are the martine people getting here?

- Any minute. - Shit.

Yeah. Hiya. Bec.

Hi. I have five minutes between patients.

I just needed a moment of sanity.

So you're calling me?

Am I on speaker phone?

I'm sorry. Honey. I'm up to my ass with this martine thing.

Oh. OK. Don't forget your parents are coming at 6:30.

Don't you dare be late.

And they're bringing Uncle Stephen.

Oh. My God. Better get out the body bags.

I'll pick up some matzo on my way home...

After the soup kitchen.

- OK. Bye. - Bye. love.

Got a minute?

Oh. Deb. Deb. Deb. Please.

This is Rosario. She's the sister-in-law...

to maria Elena. Who cleans my house.

It's very nice to meet you. Rosario.

- If you'll excuse me... - Rosario has a problem.

She lives with her four sons...

her sister. Her sister's husband. And their three kids.

And they haven't had hot water for three months.

And they just made it through the winter without heat.

Almost made it through.

Her father just passed away from pneumonia.

Sorry. I'm sorry about your dad...

but I don't know what you want me to do.

I haven't done public advocacy stuff in years.

Well. It's what you should be doing.

All right. Rosario. OK.

I'll take a look at this. I'll see what I can do. OK?

Gracias. Senor. Muchas gracias.

No problema.

Is someone coming to pick you up later. Mrs. Gromberg?

Yes. My grandson.

Oh. Well. You let us know if you need a taxi. OK?

You shouldn't be walking.

I have two grandsons.

Eli's the youngest. He's eleven. He's Pappy's favorite.

And Asher's the one who's picking me up.

I didn't want him to bother. But my son insisted.

Asher's very laid out.

Laid back.

Oh. Back.

Right. Laid back.

Are you among the living today. Mr. Gromberg?

Yeah. I'm here. Man. Ask away. What do you want to know?

I asked you if you had any thoughts...

on the progress of Mr. Stein's one-act play...

"Three Kikes and a Heeb."

Yeah. I mean. To tell you the truth. Sir...

I was completely blown away by this piece of material here.

I mean. Stein. Man. That part where you have...

you know. The antagonist antagonizing the protagonist?

- I mean. That was... - What is he talking about?

- That was rock-solid. Man. - This is ridiculous.

How many pages of mr. Stein's hard work did you actually read?

That's a good question.

I believe it was all but the last nineteen. Sir.

- Out of twenty? - Mr. Edwards.

Not bad. Yes. Ms. Maloney.

I am amazed at you people.

Did no one but I find the sickening display...

of anti-Semitism dripping from every page incredibly offensive?

- I did. I certainly did. - Would you... thank you.

I am sorry. But when you have a Jewish character...

playing charades. And you devote ten pages...

to his feeble attempt at acting out the word "Holocaust"...

and make no condemnation of the Nazis...

I'm sorry?

I mean. Do you have no sense of decency?

- Have you no sense of humor? - Humor?

How can I be anti-Semitic? I was bar mitzvahed.

Oh. I'm sorry about that. Guys.

It's my grandma. I gotta pick her up.

Could you possibly be any more unappealing?

You are like a zoo monkey smeared in his own feces.

Someone should follow you around with a pooper scooper.

Pooper scooper. Huh?

OK. Mr. Gromberg. Show a little class on your way out. Please.

Yes. Sir.

- Watch out. Man. - Yo. Dude!

OK. My beautiful ladies...

today. We are running a little bit of a special.

Two bags for ninety.

Nicky said he got two for one twenty.

Well. For Nicky. Two bags are one twenty.

But for Katie and Erica. Two bags are ninety.

Do you take checks?

Cash only. Sweetie.

I don't have any cash.

Oh. Shit. I gotta get outta here.

But I have to go to an ATm.

Don't worry about it. I'll get you guys next time.

You see. Dr. Gromberg...

in the window was this display of socks.

Beautiful. Fun socks.

Every color imaginable.

Cashmere.

Next thing I know...

the saleswoman is wrapping up ten pairs for me.

Forty bucks a pair.

That's a lot of money for socks.

Does Noah buy you special giFTs?

I can't remember the last time...

he came home with anything for me.

- Son of a bitch. - Sir?

No. No. Not you.

My ex-partner... Kipling.

He died.

At last!

We're here. Sir.

Stephen. Your brother is here.

Ahoy. Captain. Are you ready to go?

Where are we going?

Pesach. We're going to a Seder.

- Passover? - Yes.

Not yet. Not yet.

Gefilte fish?

Mama makes good gefilte fish.

Gefilte fish. Yes...

but not mama's.

Zabar's.

My daughter-in-law can't cook.

Ew! Ew! What are they doing? That's gross.

You don't know what that is? That's sixty-nine.

Sixty-nine's all right. But it's nothing like oral sex.

Get away! Get off. Shea!

Anybody wet their pampers today?

No. You?

Hey. You. You're in little Abby Staley's class. Right?

Well. You tell little Abby...

that she never finished what she started.

Tell her I've waited too long. And my balls are gonna burst.

Whoa! Miss Congeniality!

Jesus. Gromberg. Are you following me?

Following you? Why would I be following you?

You just called me a zoo monkey smeared in my own feces...

which I actually thought was kind of funny.

But. No. I'm actually just on my way uptown...

to go pick up my grandmother.

Your grandmother? Oh. Please. That is such bullshit.

No. I am. I am. Sometimes I pick her up from dialysis.

Oh. You are so following me. And I wish you would stop it.

You know what. Peg? You excite me.

You are so moronic it is unreal.

Oh. Screw me.

- I don't think so. - No. No. I gotta go.

But before I do. Let me get your digits.