Briarpatch

‐ Hang on. I ain't wearing any pants!

‐ Harold.

‐ Yeah?

‐ You're still not wearing any pants.

‐ No. I don't suppose I am.

‐ Hey, who the hell is it?

‐ It's the landlady, Cindy.

‐ What the hell does she want?

‐ What the hell you think she wants?

‐ What do you think I want, Harold?

‐ Well, I could say conversation.

Or a blessed moment in the air con

you so generously provide.

Or a three‐egg omelet.

But I suppose what you want is the rent.

‐ You suppose right.

‐ Yeah, and I intend to get it to you, I do.

It's just that work is a little light just now.

Sure you don't want that omelet?

‐ The rent, Harold. I want the rent.

And I'm going to get it today,

or you're gonna find another place

to hang your little pants.

‐ Hey, you know what?

I like your hair like that.

I think it looks really nice.

‐ Well, thank you.

Today.

‐ You gonna round up the usual suspects, huh?

‐ Yup.

‐

Oh, shit.

Jesus, get back. The gas tank could go.

‐ What the hell happened?

‐ It appears someone just blew up the landlady.

‐ Good day, sir.

‐ Miss Dill?

‐ The one and only.

‐ First time in Saint Disgrace?

‐ I grew up here.

‐ Really?

Well, you sure ain't got the look.

‐ All right, stay back.

‐ What's this?

‐ Oh, there was a break‐in at the zoo

a week or so back.

‐ Break‐in?

‐ Yes, ma'am.

Well, more like a breakout.

Somebody blew the locks on the cages.

‐ Look at that thing.

‐ They've been making a mess of things ever since.

‐ Anyway, they've pretty much

got a handle on it now.

‐ Is somebody going to help it?

‐ Can I help you, ma'am?

‐ I have a reservation. Dill. Allegra Dill.

‐ Certainly, ma'am.

Made this morning.

May I ask how long you'll be staying with us?

‐ I'm not sure. A week, maybe.

‐ That's fine.

I'll need a credit card for incidentals.

‐ You're Pick Dill.

That's what they used to call you: Pickle Dill.

‐ Not since high school.

‐Your sister told me all about it.

Tenth grade, when you took down

three of the worst bullies

this state ever managed to cough up.

‐ My finest hour.

‐ After that, they called you Pick instead of Pickle.

And they stopped for good once you got to Austin for college.

But your sister...

she always called you that.

Pick.

‐ Yes, she did.

‐ I'm A. D. Singe. Like "scorch."

I'm‐‐

Was a friend of Felicity's.

I'm also her attorney.

‐ I didn't know she had an attorney.

‐ Yup. Me.

‐ Room 981.

I apologize, we don't have anyone here

to help you with your bag.

Cody called in sick again. Rosa too.

‐ I'll manage.

‐ Since I provided counsel to Felicity,

I thought the least I could do was be here for you,

see if there's anything that you need.

‐ I need a drink.

‐ Hey, A. D. ‐ Afternoon, Dusty.

‐ What'll it be?

‐ I'll have a brandy Alexander,

and whatever the lady having.

‐ A gin, please. Ice.

‐ Fruity kind or the dry?

‐ The dry.

‐ Did you know my sister long?

‐ Yeah, a few years now.

I was at the law school when she was undergrad.

No, it wasn't like that.

I mean, I wished that it was.

I'd be lying if I said otherwise.

But it wasn't.

We were friends.

You know, good friends, eventually.

First she was just my French tutor.

I just thought it would be useful.

‐ In Texas?

‐ Well, somewhere.

Anyway, we stayed close.

She'd quiz me on the imparfait,

kick me some cases after she joined the force.

You know, mostly cops getting divorced.

And I helped her buy the apartment complex.

And I drew up her will.

‐ Here we go.

Now, you let me know if you need anything else.

‐ Sure thing, Dusty.

Thank you.

I'm terribly sorry about your sister.

‐ Thank you.

‐ I know things were complicated

between you two.

I'd toast, but today's not a day for that.

‐ Actually...

today's my birthday.

Did she ever talk about work?

‐ Sometimes. ‐ Was she working on anything

that might've caused someone to put a bomb in her trunk?

‐ Not that she ever told me about.

But there is something that you ought to know, though.

‐ What?

‐ She worked for a man named Strucker.

‐ Chief of detectives.

He called me this morning.

‐ Two hours after she died, he rang me up.

He told me to meet him at Felicity's bank.

‐ Safety‐deposit box?

‐ I was there when they opened it up.

They brought it all out the box.

Her will, some photos of your parents

from before the accident,

and an insurance policy.

It's the first I heard of it.

It's only three weeks old.

A term policy naming you sole beneficiary.

I don't think you can smoke in here anymore.

‐ I don't plan to.

‐ ‐ Okay.

‐ Okay.

‐ How much?

‐ 1.7 million.

‐ 1.7 million.

‐ I'm Calvin Strucker, Miss Dill,

chief of detectives of the SBPD.

I spoke to you on the phone.

I'd like to say again how truly sorry I am.

This is Captain Gene Colder, Homicide.

‐ Ma'am.

‐ Please come in.

‐ Go ahead, Gene.

‐ Investigating or mourning?

‐ Both, I'm afraid.

Miss Dill, when an officer falls in the line of duty,

it's imperative to‐‐ ‐ Who did it?

‐ We don't know that yet.

‐ Why'd they do it?

‐ We don't know that either.

We're here for two reasons.

One is to try and answer any questions you might have,

and the other is to offer official condolences

of the department.

‐ Your sister was an exceptional person.

‐ How much did she make in a year?

‐ Fifty‐five fifty.

‐ And the annual premium on a $1.7 million

life insurance policy

for a 27‐year‐old woman in good health

is how much?

‐ You heard about that, huh?

‐ I heard about it.

‐ The lawyer?

‐ Well, if we're going to have this conversation,

I'm going to need a cup of coffee.

‐ It's not a smart investment

for a young person with no dependents.