Good Girls

Previously on "Good Girls"...

You didn't want your cool, fancy new friends

to know about your broke-ass mom, right?

You called them douchebags and date rapers.

You make fun of everyone,

but no one's life is a bigger joke than yours.

- Where are you going? - Dad's.

Something's not adding up here.

A few weeks ago, that thing with the bank truck

burning up? Crazy how much it cost me.

- So you steal from me? - It wasn't really from you.

It's still my ass on the line.

I got a family, man.

Should have thought about that

before you messed with mine.

What if they don't give me the money?

Don't come out till they do.

- Big Kahuna. - They want to meet with us.

Kahuna Spas would love to be part of the ride.

- I got the account. - That's great!

I also had to give them the books.

Dean Boland, you are under arrest.

Your husband pled guilty today.

He's protecting her.

- Tell me one thing. - Was he part of it?

There's got to be a way to get him out.

He's the perfect fall guy.

- Is Dean okay? - That depends on you.

- He'll kill me. - We'll protect you.

- What could I even get on him? - Looks like plenty.

- Looks legit. - Who made it?

We both know how hard it is to find a good artist,

- so I'm not gonna tell you. - Fair enough.

- So you approve? - Yeah.

All you have to do is make the exchange.

Unique New York, unique New York...

And what if he figures it out?

We'll protect you.

- Red leather, yellow leather. - Red leather, yellow leather.

His gun's the size of my arm.

We're Secret Service.

So?

Ever seen "In the Line of Fire"?

You'll take a bullet for me?

He will.

Betty Botter bought a bit of bitter butter,

but the bit of butter was too bitter for the batter.

And what if he goes crazy or something, like kidnaps me?

Already tagged his car.

You just do what you've always done.

It's not gonna do that, is it?

Let's hope not.

- He knows. - He doesn't.

Yeah, he does!

He might.

Seriously?

Tracker just went dead.

I want a cop outside my house.

That'll just draw attention.

So will my dead body in the Detroit River.

Let's not lose our heads here.

I at least want my husband out.

Not till we know where the money goes.

I did everything you said!

Except the only part that matters.

- That's not on me! - It kind of is.

Trackers sometimes glitch.

Wait, what is "a pet emergency"?

Because this is an actual emergency.

Nanny flaked.

- Where's Dad? - Chicago.

Some zit cream convention.

- Yes! - Samples.

Why do none of these freaking things work?

Well, how does tomorrow help me when the meeting is today?

Okay, okay, okay.

Why don't you just let me know about Gizmo's MRI?

Okay? Bye.

Why don't you just get somebody to cover for you?

Because it's not like your mini-mart.

I own the company.

So reschedule the meeting.

It's a whole thing with the bank.

I could take him.

Really?

You have school.

Well, can't he skip?

It's one day.

You always did, right?

Not happening, my friend.

Mom, what is she supposed to do?

- Uh, I don't know. - Find literally anyone else.

There's no one else.

What about the retired guy who sleeps on his front porch?

He's not allowed around kids.

Your pool guy's like family.

Smokes weed all day in his truck.

- Come on. - Alex'll bring me my homework.

I'll do it.

But Alex will be at school.

No, no, I...

I mean I will watch Dakota.

Sorry.

Why can't I do it?

You can't even take care of the turtle.

How was I supposed to know that that green stuff was mold?

You can't even change a light bulb.

Those are all duds.

Obviously, I...

tried that. Look, I raised you.

Barely.

Excusez-moi?

Auntie Beth took me every day.

Yeah, because I was finishing 11th grade.

- You know, it's fine. - I'm just gonna figure it out.

Drop the kid.

It's very sweet of you to offer...

Do you remember when they found that toddler

wandering alone in the woods?

He made it for three days on his own.

I'm only one day.

If anything happens...

Nothing's gonna happen.

Something's gonna happen.

Come on.

- Okay. - All right.

The wipes are under the diapers.

- Check. - The butt rash stuff

- is in the side pocket. - Check.

The binky is in a Ziploc with the snacks.

Checkity-check-check.

And Mommy will always, always love you.

So, so much.

- I think that's enough. - Go, go.

Go.

- Go! - Okay.

Guess I got school.

Hey, baby.

I forgot the sauce.

What are you talking about?

The chimichurri for your lunch.

- Ooh. - Doesn't need it.

Meatloaf, and no chimichurri?

- Don't worry about it. - I'll just drop it off.

- Nah. - I'm in the neighborhood.

- No, no, no, no, no. - It's crazy here.

You know how it is on Wing Wednesday.

I'm not getting on the pole, Stan.

I'll just put it in the fridge.

- I already ate it. - You did?

Well, I'm eating now.

- Not too dry? - Mm-mm.

Mmm, it's just as good sans sauce.

Mmm. Yep.

I find that hard to believe.

You want me to lie to you?

Just want to make sure you're taken care of.

Always, baby.

Cool.

- Cool. - Later, Hill.

Later, Hill.

Psst.

I'll take that sauce, if you offering.

Dean hides junk food.

Where were you last night?

What are you doing?

You better watch your back.

Maybe he doesn't know.

At a minimum,

he suspects.

I read about this lady

who turned on her drug dealer in Florida.

- Stop reading those. - Wired up.

Surveillance helicopter tracked her.

The whole shebang.

That doesn't mean it's gonna be us.

They found her stuffed in a suitcase.

I can't.

She was shot

with the gun that the cops sent her to buy.

I cannot.

At the airport.

How is this helping?

She was his carry-on.

It's like...

I give him the baba, 'cause he acts like he wants it,

but then he doesn't want it.

And then, when I take it away, he wants it again.

Like, what?

Why'd you bring him here?

I've tried everything.

Excuse me?

I mean, there's heavy machinery.

I mean, I've gone all Harvey Karp on his ass at this point.

I mean, with the shushing and the swaddling and the shaking.

Shaking's not one of 'em.

This is exactly why I need you.

Oh... oh, now you want it.

We have bigger problems here.

Will you just give it to him, please?