The Slumber Party

Oh, watch out!

Hey, I'm Megan Bernadette Brookman.

And before you even ask, yes, you did just see

three teenagers riding a giant hedgehog.

So I'm sure you have a lot of questions

like, "Hey, Megs, how did you lose your eyebrow?"

Honestly, I wish I knew.

So let's just start at the beginning

and hopefully we'll find all the answers we're looking for.

That's Anna Maria, the birthday girl.

She's my best friend and the reason

I'm currently flailing mid air toward a smelly dumpster.

High school starts in one week

and there's no way I could do it without her.

Anna Maria. Your dad's here to see you.

Please excuse her teen angst.

She's going through a lot right now.

This is my other best friend, Paige.

See you tomorrow, Shroomy.

She's fearless and loyal.

In second grade, when Mia Thomas bullied me

for not having a mom,

Paige convinced her to cut off her own ponytail at recess.

Mikey, I need a ride.

Not happening.

Fine. Don't be surprised

when Mom finds out who prank-called Grandma

and told her she won the lottery.

Get in the truck.

This is Veronica.

Our friendship is fairly recent.

Hey, this is me.

But seriously.

How cute am I with symmetrical eyebrows?

I tend to overthink things.

Some would call me cautious.

I just like to be comfortable. Who doesn't?

But I'm working on it.

I do not wanna bring the limitations of my youth to high school.

Okay. Now you're like,

"Geez, Megs. You really know yourself for only being 14."

Yeah. Well, self-awareness

is kind of a given when both your parents are therapists.

Dad. Why are you calling me from downstairs?

Oh, just making sure your phone's charged.

Paige is here.

- I know I'll be right down. - Okay.

- I love you. - Love you.

The grasshopper phone.

According to my parents, screen time is more harmful

than being the only teenager in Atlanta without a smartphone.

This little device is powered by sheer humiliation,

which is why no one has ever seen this phone of shame

and no one ever will.

Love what you've done with the place, Conrad.

Dr. Brookman. And thank you, Paige.

Hey, Paige.

Hey, Megs.

- Bye, Dads. - Mmm. Remember to make good choices.

You are strong. You are smart. You can do hard things.

Man. Do you guys always speak in inspirational quotes?

You're like the clearance aisle at Home Goods.

Have the most fun ever.

But not too much.

Auditions for freshman flute solos are next week.

Flutiful. Really?

I knew she would love it.

Pretty sure my dads would call an Amber Alert

if they knew your brother was driving us.

Relax. He's allowed to drive siblings,

and you're basically like a sister to me. So it's cool.

Hey!

Respect the ride, thank you very much.

Okay, cool. Thanks.

Seriously?

Knock it off, turd!

Oh, my God. It's Jake Ramirez and his perfect teeth.

Oh, my gosh. He's wearing his famous skull hoodie.

I bet it smells like him.

Did you see that? His teeth are like toothpaste commercial teeth.

Plus he's a whole year older than us at school.

So he's basically a grown man.

Okay, Megs. Be cool.

Do not stare.

Can you hear me?

Your skirt is caught in the door. Hello?

Your skirt is stuck in the door.

Your skirt's caught in the door!

Oh, my gosh!

Didn't you hear me saying your skirt was caught in the door?

It's... Okay. It's fine. It's fine.

I'm sure no one saw.

I've tried to...

I just... I can't keep having this c...

- Please, you talk to her. - I know. I've tried.

- She's your daughter t... - I've tried so many times.

- How many times do I have to explain... - Mija, we talked about this.

Veronica is going to be your stepsister.

Now, she seems like a really sweet girl,

so I appreciate you including her in your slumber party tonight.

Is this a joke?

Isn't it bad enough he's getting remarried on my birthday?

Oh, mi amorcita, please. Look, we tried.

We tried to find any other date.

This is the only one that the venue had available

before your new baby sister is born.

Don't remind me.

The last thing I need is another little sister.

Hey.

Your father having this baby is a real blessing.

At his age, it's more like a miracle.

Well, she's not wrong.

Okay, I'm gonna go.

Uh, I will drop Veronica off a-after her park our lesson.

- Whoa. - And thank you very much, Anna,

for keeping your park our comments to yourself.

And I will be by early tomorrow

to pick you up for our annual birthday hike.

Don't bother. I'm not going.

Hey, we go every year.

- Well, not this year. - Anna, that's enough.

Well, why should he have anything stay the same

when he's the one making everything different?

Hey, who is the parent around here? Hmm?

You keep this up and you are not gonna like what happens next.

- Okay, viejo, relájate, please. - You let her...

Haven't you been reading those gentle parenting books...

No, cállate.

You don't talk about our daughter that way.

Can you both just stop?

You can force me to go to your wedding.

You can even force me to have your new kid at my party,

but you can't force me to go on some stupid hike

on my birthday.

Anna…

Why'd you do that? Obviously they're in the middle of something.

Because I was ready for it to be the end of something.

- Hello, girls. - Hey, Mr. Guerrero.

For a second, I forgot you don't live here anymore.

Sorry.

I have pants in my bag.

Okay.

Have fun, girls.

- What just happened? What'd I miss? - Nothing.

Just some minor, unnecessary awkwardness.

Welcome to the casa de Guerrero . That's our specialty.

- Let's do our warm-up. - What are you doing?

Let us be your personal trainers today.

If there was an offbeat, you're, like, offbeat the offbeat.

Guys, how is clapping and walking so hard?

Seriously, this was not my plan for our epic night.

We're just getting warmed up. Literally.

I'm done.

All right, birthday girl says we're done.

Ooh, give me the Oreos.

New shoes? Those are awesome.

Thanks. Guilt gift from my mom.

- Well, I mean, they are Jordan 3s. - True, true.

Come on, guys. We need to do something big.

We're in high school now.

What if we break into West Oak and free those baby ducks from the science lab?

- You're obsessed with those baby ducks. - Oh, my gosh.

What if we connected the shopping carts at Target together with zip ties

like a giant, red centipede?

Ooh, remember when Mikey woke us up at 2:00 a.m.

to help him fill your sister's car with watermelon?

When did we do that?

You guys had a sleepover without me.

Whi... Which is fine.

It's... It's totally fine.

It was a long time ago.

We were going to Six Flags the next morning, and we know

- how you feel about Six Flags. - Exactly.

Does anybody truly enjoy being at Six Flags?

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Okay. It was one time.

I didn't know the drop was gonna be that big.

And technically, I didn't even ask them to stop the ride.

They just got all worried when all the crying stopped

and they thought I was dead.

How many other things do you guys do without me?

Not that many.

"Not that many"? What does that mean?

Look. Megan.

- Megs. - Megsters.

Meggie Poo.

Don't take this the wrong way.

You're kinda scared to try new things.

- Yeah, I know. - Wait, what?

My dads are therapists.

I've been talking about this since I was four.

You know, but tonight? Tonight's gonna be different.

Tonight, I'm gonna get out of my comfort zone.

Try new things.

Anna Maria, we're gonna forget all about your dad and the beast-troll.

And, Paige, we're gonna make a name for you

before we even step on campus.

Okay. We're gonna be so ready for freshman year.

- You're serious? - Oh, yeah.

Tonight's gonna be epic.