Teen Titans Go!

Go!

Oh, dang.

Bonjour mes amis.

Ha-ha-ha.

My name is Napoleon Bonaparte.

- What did he say? - Those aren't even real words!

They are real to French people.

Ha-ha-ha.

What's going on with the hand there?

You got an upset tum tum?

Sacrebleu!

Don't you know anything about me?

This is how Napoleon stands.

That is why I'm here.

To teach you the importance of istoree.

Man, we don't wanna learn about no "istoree".

Knowing istoree helps us with the issues we face today.

Now, let us begin.

Napoleon was a leader who stood above the rest.

Ha-ha-ha.

Who grows tall over challenges

and reached heights only dreamed of by others.

Wait a second. Are you doing this whole Napoleon thing

'cause we called you short?

Or is it because we said you got baby hands?

I'm doing this because history is important.

Also, I am not short and I do not have baby hands.

And neither did Napoleon.

Come on, everyone knows Napoleon was short. Like you.

Actually, Napoleon was the average height for his time.

Some might even say he was tall.

Ha-ha-ha.

Napoleon!

Yo, yo, yo, yo, Napoleon.

We're starving mon frere, dude.

We cannot reach the baguette.

So the cheese is upon the high shelves.

Ah, fear not my countrymen for I am not short.

Yay!

Regarde, look upon the length of his reach.

He does not even need to go up on his tippy toe.

Also, he was some kind of war general

or maybe an emperor. Well, whatever.

The main thing is Napoleon was five-foot six

and that wasn't short for his time.

Yeah, but it's short for nowadays. Doink.

History says I'm not short.

Now, as punishment for your ignorance

we are going to spend the rest of the day

learning about history and me not being short.

What's there to learn? We already know it all.

If you knew it all

you wouldn't think Napoleon had baby hands.

Oh, he's got some baby hands.

Obviously, you don't know anything about history.

Prepare for me to take you on...

A trip through time, time, time, time...

Ha-ha-ha.

Travel with me back in time where the ancient Egyptians

were beginning construction...

Oh, you're talking about the Pyramids.

I know all about those.

It all started with a Pharaoh who had a crazy idea.

Look, four sides like a square

but pointy on top.

I'm telling you Pharaoh Mama we can't build these.

But they're so cool. Look! A pointy top.

I know, I love those pointy tops.

But this is ancient times.

We don't have trucks or cranes.

Just those guys.

So hot.

There has to be a way.

What is that?

Hello wonderful friends. I am the alien.

Your flying thingy is super neat.

Ooh, thank you. Your hat is also the neat.

I'll let you wear it if you can help us

build this pyramid.

Yay.

Whoa-ho-ho...

Whoa. Whoa.

Okay. Aliens did not build the Pyramids.

Not by themselves.

Thank you alien lady, bigfoot and Loch Ness monster.

This is a dream come true.

Aw...

And that's pretty much everything you need to know about the Pyramids.

Bigfoot is the man!

Wow!

That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

The history is often ridiculous.

History is the runner that steers mankind

to a better future!

Forget Egypt. Let's move on to American history

and its 16th President.

Ooh-ooh-ooh.