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That's kissing!

More champagne!

Mmm!

Mmm!

Give the boys another 20 bucks.

When you start running low, holler.

There's more where that came from, isn't that right, girls?

- Yes! Oh, yeah! - Yeah!

And open up a bottle for yourselves, too.

It ain't every day when Goldie opens a new joint in Denver

And gets married to boot.

Wish we could get off the train with you.

That's one wedding I'd like to see.

Sure would.

I wish you could too, boys.

Isn't that right, girls?

- Yeah! - Yeah!

Did you ever see...

such a bunch of beautiful bridesmaids

in your whole damn life?

Penny for your thoughts, Lat.

They ain't worth it.

I was just thinking better get some sleep.

We got a busy day in Denver tomorrow.

% A busy wedding day %

% Ah dee dah %

% Dah dah-dah dah %

Grrr!

Ah, good night, baby.

- What's the next stop? - Purgatory.

Purgatory?

Mm-hmm. Mining town. It ain't much.

Well, wake me when we get to Purgatory.

Just me. Not miss Goldie.

Yes, sir.

Midnight on time, Ez?

See what I'm writing?

Midnight on time, Ez?

I don't know, mr. Barton,

But it seems high class to write down that she is.

Don't look like you're wearing a gun under that coat.

Smart.

Heard of a man gettin' into trouble minding his own business, Ez?

Mind my own business, how? I sent the telegram.

Telegrams are supposed to be private!

From the telegrapher?

I sure would feel better with weight on my hip, pa.

If that party mentioned in the telegram is on the midnight,

You best be unarmed.

I said to mind...

The sidewinder!

Your sister's name is Patience.

Patience!

Stay out of this, pa!

What are you doing?

I'm teaching them jackass miners a lesson!

Give me that gun!

I keep telling you not to shoot at people!

They had it coming!

One of them said something vile. He said...

"Does your mother know you're out, Cecilia?"

You consider that grounds for shooting up the whole town?

I knew what he meant!

I sure don't!

They're trying to ruin my good name.

I've sworn I'm going back east

To miss Hunter's college on the Hudson river, New York,

For young ladies of good family,

And nothing's stopping me!

Except maybe you killed somebody!

I only shoot at riffraff.

You shot at us. I missed you.

Couldn't hit a bull's ass with a banjo.

Smart mouth! Hit him, pa.

I'd hit you first. Take her home, Oriville.

Don't you order me! You heard me! Home!

No stopping by the chinaman's for a beer!

She gets mean when she drinks!

How come you ever did call that girl Patience?

Yeah.

Can hear her a long way off when the wind's right.

Ain't enough late to make it worthwhile changing the board.

Sounds downright peaceful, don't it?

Calm before the storm,

If that certain party's onboard.

Yeah.

Well?

We'll say we know you didn't get off at Purgatory.

We don't know where you got off,

But we know it wasn't Purgatory.

Don't open up, boys. Nothing but mail for Purgatory.

No passengers getting off here.

Be bad manners to call the conductor a liar, so let's not.

No sense opening up.

Nobody's getting off at Purgatory.

Evening. Or morning, rather. It's 1:00 in the morning.

I got a watch.

Just get off the train?

Did you ever hear of an eagle picking up a grown man and

carrying him cross-country?

I can't say that I have.

Well, you have now. I come by eagle.

That's him.

If I had my rifle,

I could nail him between the shoulders.

That's murder. So.

It might be the wrong man.

Got to be him... big, mean, and ugly,

And sneaking off the train.

He gets a room, we ask him questions at the hotel.

Good. Let's wait in the chinaman's back room.

Pa, she's going to get her another beer.

So am I!

Can't you read?

That sign says, "take a key. Go to bed".

That sign?

Go to bed.

Sign must've gotten a few strays.

We got lots of shooting in this town.

Here. Register.

Your handle and your hometown.

Already did.

"Smith".

Is that your real name? Not that I'm nosy.

Give me a room.

Aw, keep your shirt on.

Ooh, say, that's real silk, isn't it?

You must be rich.

Well?

- Well what? - You rich?

Not that I'm curious.

Is there another hotel in this town?

Aw, keep your shirt on... your silk shirt.

Ha ha ha ha! That's a good one.

Ha ha!

Come on.

Ha ha! O.k.

Ha ha!

Just as good a service

As in the Palmer House in Chicago.

Come on.

Watch your step here.

Turn right. Come on

Up at the top of the stairs.

Ha ha! Your silk shirt!

If you hear a lot of screaming, don't pay no heed.

One of the miners has delirium tremens every now and then.

His name's Smith, too.

Ha ha! Maybe you're related.

Ha ha ha ha!

There's 2 ways you can have the windows...

opened or closed.

Closed is hot.

Open, there's flies eat you alive.

Let me help you unpack.

Never mind.

Oh, no trouble. No trouble at all.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

What's them?

Grabbed the wrong suitcase.

What are these things?

That's a kewpie doll.

I won one once at the state fair

time I went to Denver.

And got rolled by some floozy.

Shut up.

Stop it!

Let's go ask Martha Perkins about this man.

Got change for a $100?

No, I haven't.

I'll get change and pay you when I get back.

Patience Barton, you get away from there!

I could tell by that stupid face

He wouldn't have any imagination. Smith.

You couldn't expect him to go round signing

his own name in his business.

Aah! Patience Barton,

You give me my key back!

Mister?

Want to buy a pair of spurs?

No. I wonder if...

They've hardly been used. Lots of wear left in them.

Outlast a dozen horses.

I don't ride.

This town got a doctor?

Big husky fella like you,

What you need a doctor for?

I figured I'd tell the doctor that. If I tell you...

I'd get tired of repeating it.

Now, this town got a doctor?

I don't know what I'll tell the man

When he sees this suitcase.

You'll put something together.

He might have secret compartments.

I've been through it 3 times.

I told you, he got the wrong suitcase.

I'm telling you, the man got the wrong suitcase.

Hey! Pa, make him let go!

I got him! I got him, pa!

You promise to marry that girl