Hard Rock Zombies

Well, come on!

Put your hands together!

You know, this ain't music.

Sounds kinda like shit.

Poo?

What?

- No, John, it's shit!

Do we really want the...

children of Grand Guignol listening to this kind of garbage?

Noop.

No.

Noop.

Well alright!

Now!

Yeah!

- Jessie... I need photos.

You know - girls screaming, climbing all over you.

Don Matson is Columbia Records, man!

He wants to see those kids insane.

- Listen, man, we are musicians,

you know, not daycamp counselors.

Now, look it...

I've busted my ass a year for this!

In three months you'll be national.

No more shit towns and shit bands.

Come on, man!

I need those photos and I need them tonight.

So you get your butts out there!

Forget it.

Suit yourself.

Okay, girls...

Come on in!

Let's go.

Oh, don't fall in love with these hunks there, chicks.

We're famous!

- Yay! You're totally gross.

- Beautiful! - Where?

Oh yeah, right there!

Put the 'O' in the middle!

- Oh, my goodness! - Beautiful, beautiful!

- Alright, what am I supposed to do?

- Jessie, sign those luscious nubile tender under-age tits, man!

Right.

Don't dot the 'i' too hard...

One time for you.

Two inches is far enough away.

Alright, what's your name?

Donnie, you're a fixer!

Picture, Ron,

there's enough room here for the Gettysburg Address.

- How much, sweetie? - Yeah-ha!

- Hey, you know, girls...

Soon, I'm gonna be a mormon and you'll all be my wives.

That's it, freeze!

Good, good, okay.

One more. Jessie, just one more.

- That's enough! - Come on, one more...

I said 'hi'.

Hello.

- Wanna come in, meet the band?

Autograph?

Strange kid...

- Tomorrow night you're supposed to play at Grand Guignol.

You'll be there, little girl?

Don't come.

Why not?

They don't want you.

Who don't?

Just don't come.

My father...

- Jessie, it's time for juggs to get wet... - ...T-shirt contest!

The winner gets in your pants, man.

Ha ha ha ha! - Wait a minute.

Morte ascendere, Amen.

Ominus ascendere, Amen.

Morte ascendere, Amen.

Signes ascendere, Amen.

Ominus ascendere, Amen.

Morte ascendere, Amen.

Signes ascendere-- - Sounds pretty weird.

What is it?

Got it from a book.

A who?

- A book! You know?

Boooook?

Shit.

- Said, in the middle ages they used its music to raise the dead.

Raise the dead?

What for?

Probably to mop your floors...

Or uh, paint your house,

...fuck your wife?

Ominus ascendere, Amen.

Shit!

How many times I gotta kill that sucker?

Well, if I'm not mistaken,

...it looks like this music might be bringing it back to life.

Then quit!

Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron...

Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron!

Oh! Geez Louise! Pull over!

Auuuuuu!

Mama!

Lord, have mercy!

You live around here?

Not far.

- Last night, some other girl told us to stay out of here.

- Strange town... Strange little girls.

Strange big girls!

Maybe...

Why'd she want us to stay out?

Can't imagine.

- Is this town kinda weird, or something?

Nothing weird here...

Turn right!

What for?

Home.

Might as well stay with us. Beats the motel.

Well, I don't know...

Oh, come on, Ron!

- Yeah, it's free. She's a fine mama!

Okay...

- Hey, can I give you a hand? - Yeah, sure, thanks a lot!

Bobby!

Jesus!

- Enchanted. - What's that?

It's only a toy, look.

- Mickey? Mickey!

Now, what did I tell you,

about keeping your toys in your room, hmm?

- I... don't wanna be impolite, but...

What's that screaming?

- It's just my mother's primal scream therapy...

Quiet, mama! Guests!

You see? We're very accomodating to our guests.

Won't you come in and make yourself at home?

- Real damn peaceful out here in the country...

- Make all the hands one hand.