1Up

Huh?

V, you there?

- V. V? - Where'’d she go? Mid lane'’s totally open.

- She ghosting us? - What is she doing?

Totally asleep at the wheel.

Hello?

- V? -

Good morning.

-Indy! -Sorry I didn'’t wake you. You looked so cozy

sleeping through one of your fantasy beatings.

Oh, um, wanna go to a silent disco tonight?

We get high, it'’ll be just like a regular disco.

I have practice.

-Do you ever stop playing? -Only to eat and sleep.

Okay. Well, never say I didn'’t try to get you laid.

Oh, breakfast brownie?

-Oh, okay. -Made them myself.

Cocoa, hazelnut, psilocybin.

-Oh, low-key bitter, right? -Low-key laced-with-shrooms!

I can'’t be tripping in class, Indy.

Why not?

A princess and a plumber? I'’m sorry.

-In this economy, it'’s not happening. -Hey.

-Oh, hey. -What'’d I miss?

The attendance sheet.

-Really? -

All right, settle down.

Settle down.

The history of video games stretches far back

to the early 1950'’s.

Novelty simulations by adventurous students

inadvertently formed the foundation of what is now

a several-hundred-billion-dollar industry.

Before characters like Donkey Kong, Sonic,

and Tomb Raider graced our screens.

Lara Croft is smoking.

Tits.

-What'’s your name? -Todd.

Todd. You'’re talking about her animated endowments?

I guess so.

Well, that is actually the point of her design.

It wasn'’t long ago that games were marketed entirely

to a generation of guys.

How many of you have played Assassin'’s Creed?

The publishers decided that playing as a female character

made the game un-relatable.

So gamers could not relate to this,

but they could relate to this?

But here'’s the thing,

as the gaming industry exploded in sales,

the profile of a traditional gamer has dramatically changed.

And now, gamers are everyone.

-Even Todd. -

So when some of you decide to make games of your own,

for the love of God, please consider giving

your female characters a pair of pants.

Or regular-sized tits!

Bingo!

I'’m Parker Nesby and this is the history

of video games.

Parker Nesby, I know that name.

All right, all right, and now with just the starters.

Yo, out support!

Out of here.

Okay, yo. All right, I'’m gonna stand like-- All right, you guys,

right here, right here, okay?

Smile,

raise your eyebrows, stop smiling.

-That'’s your model face. -Who opened the toolbox?

All right, cool, just like some singles now. Like of me.

-Solo, that'’s a single. -Oh.

- Single, me. - Okay.

Like, you know.

Just like a little bit quicker.

Dabbing is not a thing anymore.

Okay, dabbing is still a thing,

and literally everyone can hear you.

Oh, Ricardo, why aren'’t you in the photo?

Like, if you catch the muscle on accident.

Oh, who'’s this? Oh. Who'’s that?

Miami'’s on line.

Two minutes to game time.

-No mercy, boys. -Whoo.

I might have to sit this one out, Captain.

I think I flexed my thumb too hard in the warm-up.

Let me take a look.

Oh, oh.

How'’s that feel?

Has he ever touched you like that?

-One to ten. -Oh.

Ugh, he will never touch me like that.

Eleven.

-V! -Yeah?

You'’re in!

-Oh, my God! -

Okay, change of personnel, but we stick to the plan.

Points are great, but they only matter

in tournament seeding.

Destroy the orb, get the win.

V, you run support.

Don'’t screw it up.

Betas on three! One, two, three!

-Betas! -Betas!

An allied tower is under attack.

Dustin! They'’re flanking us.

I know what I'’m doing, support!

Then stop face-checking and let our casters blast at range.

V, I need a heal over here.

Okay, I'’ll be there in a second.

Yup, my girl.

Yeah.

No, no, no, ugh!

Dustin, pay attention. I need to heal the others too.

Quit squawking over the comms and let me run this.

V, seriously, chill.

She'’s literally keeping your boy in the game, Ricardo!

Whoo! I am crushing last hits.

-I'’m wasted. They got behind me. -

Everyone, listen up, they'’re outflanking us.

Charge straight up the middle.

Just said that.

I need a heal.

Running support means more than just healing you, Dustin.

Everyone else is dead.

The enemy has been slayed.

The power is mine.

Oh, victory!

That'’s what I'’m talking about.

Yeah!

And that'’s how it'’s done.

- Suck it, Miami! -But we almost lost.

You'’re not always gonna be so lucky.

V, I know you think you know what you'’re doing,

but you have a lot to learn, okay.

And you will, from the bench.

Seriously? I'’m a nationally ranked player!

With far more skill than most of you.

That'’s not remotely true.

It'’s kinda true.

Look, Dustin,

I need to have a role on this team.

You are support.

If you earn a better position, I'’ll give you one,

but considering we'’re the reigning collegiate champs,

I'’d say we'’re good as is.

Everyone let'’s just be cool.

We'’re all on the same team.

-I don'’t know. Are we? -Whoa, easy, V.

Don'’t get all emotional, '’cause I'’m not giving you special treatment.

Special treatment? I earned my gaming scholarship, because I'’m a good gamer.

Oh, hate to break it to you, V, but the only reason

you have a spot on this team is because you guys have...

-You know, vaginas. -What?

I actually uh-- I think it'’s vulvas, Dustin.

Yeah, come again.

Yup, vagina is just the birth canal

and the vulva is the all-encompassing--

Owen, please.

Vaginas.

I'’m done.

-V, come on. -No, I'’m done!

Oh, you quit?

-Oh. -I quit!

Do not touch that, Owen!

You all have some serious issues. I'’m out, too.

Wow! I'’ve never witnessed live-action PMS.

Clean up all that crap, Owen.

-V, wait. -Not now, Sloane.

I'’m done.

Come on, Barrett. Let me hear you!

You'’re freaking me out!

Please stop yelling.

You'’ve been sitting here comatose for like an hour

and I'’m really worried about your aura.

It'’s usually like a bright purple,

-but right now it'’s like... -My aura'’s fine.

Come dance with me. Let'’s go.

Wasn'’t getting me out of the dorm

victory enough for you?

Yes, but now you need to move your body.

Feel the energy of this magical place.