LEGO Batman: The Movie - DC Super Heroes Unite

- Oh, after you. -Ugh.

- You worried? -Superman does not worry.

Lex?

Right here.

You diseased maniac.

I'll take it from here.

- Unh. -You feel okay, Superman?

Huh?

Hmm.

Huh?

Lex, I'm surprised you took time away from your presidential campaign...

...and came all the way to Gotham City for this.

Oh, dear lady, as a nominee it's my pleasure and privilege to be here.

- Especially if you win. Ha-ha-ha.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for.

We're here tonight to honor a great man.

A man who has proved time and again his first priority is helping those in need.

This year's Man of the Year Award goes to...

...Bruce Wayne.

Next year, buddy.

Despise that guy.

- Bruce, will you say a few words? -Well, there's not much to say.

I do what little I can, since every once in a while, everyone needs a helping hand.

Though I'm not sure I deserve an award for it.

You heard him, he doesn't deserve it.

Which is just as well, since we've got a last-minute entry.

Who has been there for you?

One man, who has made it his mission to improve the lives of people around him.

He has remodeled our buildings.

Helped keep our banks free of unnecessary clutter.

You have always shown your appreciation.

Ha-ha-ha! You're the best, Joker.

We'll do anything for you. -Hmm.

And why stop now?

A standing ovation? Did not expect that.

But I'll take it. And also everything else.

Excuse me, sir. I'm going to purloin your valuables.

Riddle me this. What's green and found in your wallet?

- Money? -Um, no. Not anymore!

Sorry to rain on your parade, my dear.

Thanks so much.

Well, well, Lex Luthor, presidential candidate...

...and Superman's least-favorite bald person.

No, thanks. I don't wanna get joy buzzed.

Oh, don't worry, I didn't want to shake hands.

I want your watch.

Nice running into you. Let's do it again sometime.

Oh, we will.

Speech! Speech! Come on, Joker!

- Tell us, come on! -Ha-ha-ha!

What a night. Such an honor. I'm speechless.

Aw, who am I kidding? When am I ever speechless?

Look at that face. It's like, "What's he gonna say?

What's going to come out of that mouth of his?"

Sorry to wipe that grin off your face, Joker.

You're not sorry. You're not sorry at all.

Riddle me this, Batman. What wears a mask and is unconscious?

You. Unh!

Let's get him.

Let's ask the coin.

Huh?

- Get going, Robin. I was waiting for you.

Ah! My kind of party.

Good food, good people, good goody bags.

Hey, Batlame and Slobbin.

Why are you guys hanging around? Ha! You see what I did there?

We're here to get those valuables you stole, Joker.

- And Bruce Wayne's award. -This is my award. It very clearly says me.

Joker!

You just... But you just stuck that on there.

- Whoa! -Robin, focus on your flying.

Sorry. Whoa!

Aw. I missed.

You like shark, Batman? Because I think they're going to like you.

[BATMAN GROWLS THEN SHARK WHIMPERS]

Oh, come on!

I can't keep up! -I'll take it from here.

Huh?

You like missiles, Batman? Because I think they're going to like you.

Huh?

Let's see. What do we have? Oh, good!

You like pie, Batman? Because I think... Ah, forget it.

Ugh! Where does he get these unbreakable toys?

Aah! Oh, come on!

Oh, see? Now you get out. You were afraid of a real fight.

Yeah. You're so scary.

Watch the suit, boys!

- Thanks for helping out, Batman. -Hey, you know, I also was a part of this.

- Hey, guys. Need a hand? -With what? Parking?

Huh?

Yeah, sorry, I wanted to be there for your award.

- Uh, I mean, uh, Bruce Wayne's award. -Me too.

- Kids weren't invited. -Mm.

- So I saw you put a big hole in the theater. I'll get it repaired.

I already did that. Also, I put your boat back in the water.

- Hey, thanks. Yeah, thanks.

You know, you should really try not to make such a mess...

...while you're fighting crime.

I can see you smirking in there. X-ray vision.

Aren't there people somewhere else that need your help right now?

Yeah, actually, there are. I should go. See you, guys.

- Bye, Superman. He's so nice. Yeah, he's great.

- You were kind of rude. -I was doing a systems check.

See you at the Batcave.

Scenes of chaos tonight at the Gotham City Theater...

...where the Joker has interrupted the prestigious Man of the Year Awards.

Watch the suit, boys!

This was the fifth annual Man of the Year ceremony to be held in Gotham...

...but only the second to be brought to a premature end...

-...by a gang of rampaging villains. -Computer.

I have an election to win.

Looks like another stay in Arkham Asylum for the Joker.

Hmm.

We love you, Joker!

I'll win in a landslide.

Huh?

Oh, come on.

First, Batman. Second, Superman.

Kryptonite.

Batman safely recovered all the stolen property...

...including Bruce Wayne's Man of the Year Award.

The only thing left for Joker?

A swift return to Arkham Asylum, along with the title Goon of the Year.

Heh. Ahem.

This is Clark Kent on assignment in Gotham City for Daily Planet Online.

Hey!

I was watching that.

Too much television is bad for you, pumpkin.

How does he sneak all that stuff in?

Clark Kent. Really despise that guy.

Coming all the way to Gotham City to insult me.

Me. A hometown boy who made good.

You're right. You don't deserve that.

That's right, I don't. Eh-- Uh, wait, who said that?

How would you like to be out of Arkham right now...

...and given a chance to take revenge on Batman and the rest of this ungrateful city?

Well, I'd have to be crazy to say no to that offer.

Unless you're just one of the voices in my head, in which case, I'm crazy anyway.

What?

Oh, hey, Lex.

Have you come to get your watch back...

...or did a bus from Metropolis get lost and break down?

First, I don't take the bus.

And second, yes, give me my watch.

- So, what you got there? -This, my friend, is the deconstructor.

It emits a unique energy...

...one that is absorbed so quickly by any shiny black object...

...that it causes it to pull itself apart.

Nifty. What's it got to do with me?

First, I need help replacing its power source.

- It doesn't run on double-A batteries. -Ha-ha-ha!

Kryptonite.

And second, I might need some of that Joker gas you're so good at making.

Oh, yeah.

I guess that could come in handy for someone running for president.

You help me, you can use the deconstructor to your heart's content.

Know anybody who has lots of shiny black unbreakable toys?

I don't know who you're referring to.

- Come on. Batman. Oh, you were... -Joking. I'm the Joker.

Prisoner escape.

- Repeat, prisoner escape. -We should be going.

Can I just have one try?

Joker, come on!

It's a shame. Now someone's going to have to fix this.