Portal in the Pines

All systems green.

Collider core stable.

Portal detected.

Portal detected.

Oh!

Pull the plu--

Hey, you rockers and rollers.

You're tuned in to the one and only Midnight Metal Hour on 96X with me,

Midnight Mike Steel. We've got some breaking news

hotter than a pyro malfunction at a KISS concert.

[power outage sound)

I'm being told there's a significant explosion near the military base.

An 18-wheeler has jackknifed on Cooper Road,

Which is now closed

Going both ways.

So you're going to have to find yourself a detour

on the way home from the wet T-shirt contest at Flamingos.

- -Sorry, fellas.

If you got the 411, hit me up.

Lines are lighting up already.

Call number one.

You're on with Midnight Mike Steel. Go!

There ain't no jackknifed 18-wheeler.

That whole damn place is on fire.

Maybe a fertilizer explosion or something.

Yes, because nothing says top secret military base like a rogue bag of

manure! Caller number two,

what's your scoop?

Fertilizer explosion, my ass.

I heard they're testing new weapons down at the base.

I don't live too far from there.

And my ground shook like Nagasaki.

Ha!

Okay, so far we have flaming cow poops and nukes as the cause.

Caller number three,

what do you say about all this?

Hello?

You there?

I'm here.

What's your name, man?

Oh, it's it's Clint.

Well, Clint, did a bomb blow up out there or what?

It-it's much worse than that.

I saw it myself, Mike.

Yeah? What did you see, Clint?

Some kind of...

portal...

in the pines.

You mean a portal like Star Trek?

It looked like some kind of doorway to hell.

And how much did you drink before you went out there, Clint?

I saw people covered in blood, burned down to their bones.

They were being sucked up into the sk--

Okay. Thank you, Clint.

Bar's must have closed early tonight.

This sounds like a good time to roll out some Sabbath...

Welcome to the fire tower, boys and girls.

Your first stop before the real thing.

Now, a burning building is not a place most sane people want to be.

But you crazy idiots signed up for this, and somebody's got to do the dirty work, right?

Yes sir.

Your back-end man will find the plug.

Your priority is to clear the building.

Now, primary search gets tough in zero visibility.

That's where your training comes in.

And under no circumstances are you to remove your mask.

It is a matter between life and death.

Do you understand?

Yes, sir.

All right, all right, Duke. Light her up.

Lighting her up!

Piece of cake.

All right, you have one minute to get in and get out before this place is hell on earth.

Let's go.

Move move move move!

Time is of the essence.

Let's go! Up the stairs. Move move move!

We are in a burning building.

It is important to remember your training.

You are here to find the bodies.

And remember, do not, under any circumstances

touch your mask!

All right we got 10-seconds to get out of here.

Let's go down the stairs. Move!

Get that body down.

Let's go.

Move!

Emory, whose alarm is that?

It's the Rookie.

Emory, help me move him over.

Pick him up. Here we go.

One. Two.

Three.

Get him out! Let's get him outside. Go!

Come on, let's move, move, move!

Jesse.

Jesse.

Jesse!

Jesse, you got this?

Fire tower to dispatch, we need the damn medic now, please!

Send the medic.

Breathe, damn it!

This is why we don't take our masks off.

Hey! Found the culprit.

Seal's dry-rotted. Smoke just went right on through.

You know, these are supposed to be training exercises, right?

Yeah, it spiced up today, didn't it?

I'm gonna put a spicy incident report on the chief's desk.

I've been telling him for months that this gear is ancient.

And the new stuff keeps coming up missing.

Sure, that's a good idea?

He stuck his neck out for you.

You might not want to be a thorn in his ass right now.

Yeah, alright, I hear you.

Watch this.

Hey, Smokey!

Hey...

Cap, thanks for saving my ass out there.

Yeah.

Piece of cake. Right?

Sweet kid.

It happened again.

What?

Cut the shit, man.

You saw me freeze up back there.

Yeah, but you pulled out of it.

This time.

Shit, I'm late.

Oh, whoa whoa whoa whoa...

don't tell me you finally decided to go out and have fun without me.

No, I got Charlie this weekend.

Oh, shit.

So Ashley finally decided to come through.

Yeah, well, trial run. So we'll see.

Just keep doing what you're doing and everything will work itself out.

Oh, hey...

Bring him by Herby-K's tomorrow. Crew's going for lunch.

Be great to see him.

Yeah, I could do that.

But only if you wear that red dress I like.

Oh, it's a date.

See you, bud.

See you.

You're an hour late.

Look, there was an accident at the fire hou--

You want unsupervised weekends, but you can't show up on time?

He needs you, Jesse.

I need you

to step up.

All right.

Okay.

It won't happen again.

Hey, buddy.

Bye, mom. Love you.

I love you, honey.

I need him back Sunday morning.

He's got homework to finish.

What are you listening to?

A podcast.

What's it called?

Strange, Dark & Mysterious.

So you're, still into Bigfoot and all that stuff then, eh?

It's cryptids.

Cryptids?

Cryptids.

Okay.

All right.

Cool.

I will then, just...

get home, thaw out the steaks...

Just, maybe...

rub them in some dirt first.

What are you saying?

Huh? No-Nothing. Nothing.

I was just...

Seeing if you were listening to me.

Can I borrow your phone charger? I left mine at home.

Yeah, give it to me.

I'll go plug it in.

Holy shit.

Dad, dad!

What the hell are you going on about?

Look!

What in the--

It's like those UFOs you're always talking about.

They called UAP's now.

Oh.

Looks like it went over by the old military base.

Look at this!

The heck is it?