Glue Trap

Can I live?

I mean, you cropped me out of a photo.

Your eyes were closed and I was feeling my look.

Why do you have to make everything into life or death?

Did I say that? Did I use those words?

-I mean... -All right.

Come on, can I talk about how you hiding my existence

hurts my feelings without you referring to it as histrionics?

-Really? Histrionics? -Yeah.

You've used that exact word to talk about my feelings.

I think you even make a point of saying "his" trionics.

What?

That's... Okay. All right.

You guys are both making valid points,

and we all have feelings, and feelings are what matter.

See? Feelings are important. I agree.

Okay, so because you feel left out...

I didn't say that. I just said...

We don't have to do everything together, Dan.

Soup's on!

And yes, I did, in fact, make soup,

along with a divine casserole.

Anybody need a refill?

So, by this point, I'm three sheets to the wind,

and Jen here decides that it's the perfect moment

for me to say hi to her boss.

Yeah, I figured if Jenn was sated,

it would lower the odds she's going to yell at everyone

about me working all hours.

Hey, I didn't call out your boss

for trying to hide from his wife and kids, did I?

No, you didn't.

You told Robin my late nights were--

What was your phrase, babe?

Um, the biggest waste of time and resources

since the Spider-Man musical.

Yes, and have you been fired?

Not yet, but... oh, my God.

So, KJ, have you had any wild holiday parties?

Oh, I don't go to any of those.

I'm not really trying to work unpaid hours at the office.

You're welcome, by the way, for saving you

-from all that bullshit. -Oh, I wouldn't mind.

I also wouldn't mind if you went to

some of my label's release shows.

Well, why would I go to those?

Those are your work events. I don't know anyone there.

I don't know. Just, you know, for support.

Okay. How?

How would I help?

I mean, what am I going to do?

Do we have to think of some type of charming anecdote

to perform together?

Forget it.

Oh, I, uh, I saw your vacation photos.

-Norway. - Yeah.

Oh my God, they're less sad than I expected.

You know, hey, it was fun to get out somewhere

just like in the middle of nowhere,

even if all they do is solve murders and eat kipper.

I wish we could do that.

What? Eat kipper?

No.

Uh, get away.

I mean, maybe not...

Or maybe, but, you know, just somewhere.

Yeah, I could be into somewhere.

Oh, well, you should go to my family's cabin.

They would have a blast, right, Jenn?

Oh, yeah. Y'all would love it up there.

It's so peaceful and quiet, and nobody's around,

and it's just lovely.

Jenn, Jenn, thank you.

That's so nice of you.

I mean, that-- that would be great.

Yeah, thanks.

And no rules.

Well, one rule, please don't burn the place down.

- Easy enough. -Yes, thank you.

We'll have to check our schedule.

Oh, well, anytime. We're flexible.

Oh, and we can tell you where to hike.

Yeah, and it sounds-- it sounds great.

We'll just have to talk to each other about it first,

but I'm sure we will find a time to go, sometime.

How's next weekend?

Sure.

Uh, no one in my family has plans to use it,

so cabin's yours if you want.

Next weekend it is.

- You're gonna love it! - Of course!

So excited for you guys.

Yeah, do the hike with the waterfall.

Oh, there's waterfalls--

Do you mean the big one or the little one?

Can you turn it down? Turn it down.

I didn't mean that you had to turn it off.

Mm. It's no problem.

This will be nice.

Yeah, I think so.

As long as one night we end up curled

in front of a roaring fire, I will be happy.

What about you? What's on the docket?

Um... hmm.

Mostly just sit and enjoy the quiet.

Read, maybe get some writing done.

How about you? Anything else?

Well, I was just looking forward to cooking together.

Uh, the kitchen there's supposed to be great.

Maybe take some hikes.

Maybe... really, just hanging out together.

Yeah, yeah, hiking could be fun.

Maybe we'll run into a deer

and have some kind of nature moment.

Yeah, maybe.

Not a zero percent chance.

Oh my God. Wait, I thought you said that

-this was a private road. -Uh, it is.

Does he know that?

-Hello. - Hi.

Can I, uh, help you?

Yeah, we're friends of the Ramsays.

We're using their place. I'm Dan.

-KJ. -Oh, fun.

Two whole letters.

Uh, I'm Rick. I live around the corner,

just, you know, stretching my legs.

Yeah, sure. Of course.

Anyway, uh, you two have a blessed day.

-"Have a blessed day." -Wow.

I'm really glad that that is all he said.

We are really in the middle of nowhere.

-Yes, we are. -Hm.

You know what? Your goodwill.

Karate chops... for spider webs..

Can't just use a stick?

I guess you could do that, but that's...

I don't know.

Wow.

Here it is.

It's real.

Oh, thank God.

There's a TV in case nature sucks.

Mm.

Oh! Oh.

There's so much space!

Oh, my God.

What is it?

Glue trap?

-Are you serious? -

Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

-Just sit down for a second. -No, no, it's okay.

-How sticky is it? -I got it, I got it. Ew.

Okay.

Okay.

All good.

Oh, man.

Can't wait to get my Dagwood on.

Your-- excuse me?

You know, from the comics?

Oh. Uh, I don't--

Oh. Hm.

Hm...

Hey.

Thought I lost you there for a minute.

Oh. Hey, you found me.

You know, this bed is awfully big.

Do you maybe want to share it with me?

Are you sure?

I mean, I wouldn't want to intrude.

No.

No, I actually saved a spot, just for you.

-What? What? -Oh, I'm sorry, nothing.

It's just funny, because I...

I saved a spot right for you.

-There. -Oh.

Uh, just give me-- give me a second.

Are you okay?

Just a minute.

Okay.

Uh, I'm gonna-- I'm gonna go see if they left any snacks.

Okay.

Oh, God.

Yah!