Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Hey, Gina, you got that file I needed Captain Holt to sign?

Uh-huh.

Mm.

Gina hasn't taken her eyes off her phone in two hours.

First person to make her look up wins the pot.

I'm in.

A bet which improves someone's manners? Double score.

Sorry, guys. I got this in the bag.

I used to have to distract her from her phone

all the time when we were smooshin' booties.

- Ugh. - Yeah.

Hey, girl...

Catch you later.

Mid-morning dance party.

She's dancing even better than normal.

Oh, my God, did you hear that George W. Bush died?

Who dat?

Ooh.

Gina may never look at another real human being again.

She's unbeatable.

Oh, I don't know about that.

Terrence Jeffords, are you kidding me?

Changed my relationship status to "it's complicated."

Pony up, y'all!

Whoo!

It's my wife.

Hey, baby.

No! No, no, no. It was a mistake.

My thumb slipped and... I have to go home.

Ladies and gentlemen, today is the greatest day of my life.

Guess who just got murdered!

That's right... it's Carl Mather.

What? I'm the only one gasping?

Guys, Carl Mather? Did 25 years in Attica...

Sor... sorry.

Just point at me when you want me to gasp.

Will do.

Mather is part of the Fulton Street Four.

Oh!

They stole $21 million from an armored car depot.

Feds caught them but they never found the money.

- Until now. - You found $21 million?

Oh, God no. Not yet.

I can see how that would be confusing though.

I'm sorry. But I'm going to.

Over the past six months,

all four of these guys have been released,

and now one of them shows up dead.

Someone's after that money,

and they're willing to kill for it.

You're getting ahead of yourself.

You don't know that Mather's death

is connected to the money yet.

Don't turn this into something bigger than it is,

not with Madeline Wuntch watching us at all times.

Ew. When'd they put that in?

Right after Wuntch got promoted.

She had it installed at that height so she'd,

I quote, "always be looking down at me," unquote.

Treat this like a regular case.

Sir, with all due respect, this is an epic case.

It's the reason I became a cop.

I mean, hunting down a murderer,

recovering millions in stolen money,

rappelling out of a chopper with a knife between my teeth.

Why would you jump out of a helicopter

with a knife in your mouth?

It's called a chopper, and the knife is in my mouth

because both of my hands are holding giant machine guns.

And that's how it's going down.

Okay, reminder, tomorrow we are hosting

a field trip for the Brooklyn Park Magnet School.

Sorry, Sarge, I can't be around magnets.

Pacemaker.

I'm actually not gonna correct you on that.

Guys, I really need this to go well.

My girls are on the wait list for their preschool

and it's twice as tough to get in with twins.

Why don't you just get one of them in

and then let them take turns going to school every other day?

Diaz, that's crazy.

I asked my wife and she said no.

This field trip has to go well.

This is my chance to impress the principal.

Sarge, you're in luck.

I went to a magnet school where I was voted

"most likely to befriend a school administrator."

Oh, Amy.

Preteens are my people.

I speak their language.

They are gonna have an amazing time.

Thanks, guys. That's great.

If you want, I can show them some of the cool stuff

we have in the evidence locker.

I'm pretty sure there's a bag of hands in there.

Whoa! No. No.

We got to make this place kid-friendly.

No crime scene photos lying about.

That's not a crime scene.

That's a boudoir photo I'm having framed for my wife.

That's me underneath the mask.

Oh, God!

Next, let's get statements from the neighbors.

Ah, hello, Captain.

Quick update: Another one of the Fulton Street Four

was murdered here this morning.

Huh, I'm surprised you're not celebrating inappropriately.

This is a crime scene and I'm a professional.

You did it before I showed up?

Yeah, that is exactly correct.

So two of these guys murdered in the past two days?

It has to be tied to the missing money.

Admit I was right.

Circumstances do suggest a connection.

Admit it with more gusto.

- You were right. - Yes! Did you get it, Boyle?

Oh, the camera was in selfie mode,

but I look super proud of you.

Unfortunately, because this case has turned out to be important,

that she-skunk Madeline Wuntch

has her hindquarters pointed right at it.

She wants to see us in her office,

no doubt to give the case to Major Crimes.

No, no, no. We can't let that happen.

Sir, we have to do something.

Fine. I'll seduce her.

I'll just put on my bike shorts

and give her a glimpse of the quad cities.

No. No. That's not what I meant.

I meant we have to fight her.

We're not gonna fight her. She's the devil.

And you don't dance with the devil, because you get burned.

Also, because in Madeline's case,

she has no rhythm and her hands are like little rat claws.

If she wants the case, it's hers.

For the record, you're turning this murder scene

into a real bummer-scape.

Tell me you got that zinger.

Oh, the camera was in selfie mode again,

but I was really laughing hard.

Okay.

Okay, kids, this is where my detective squad solves crimes.

- Wow. - This is my desk.

You can tell by the framed 200-piece puzzle

my three-year-olds put together on their own.

That's very advanced, Sergeant Jeffords.

Is it? I wouldn't know what milestones

are impressive to a school admissions officer.

They can count to 20 in English and Mandarin.

Hi. Detective Santiago, magnet school alumna.

Well, I appreciate that you used

the proper declension of alumnus.

Well, some say Latin is a dead language,

but I say it's just taking a long nap.

Okay, you two are obviously the alphas.

Let me guess.

You're dating the blond kid and you like Filipino Bieber

but you're worried he's still into

Little Miss Side Braid Janky Purse.

How did you know?

I know so much.

Hi, I'm Gina.

Hey.

Hello, Raymond.

How do you like my new office? 20th floor.

Yes, I never thought I'd see you this high

without a broom under you.

Enough niceties. Have a seat.

Thanks, but I'm actually fine standing.

I could stay in these bad boys all day.

So two members of the Fulton Street Four

have been murdered... sounds like a big case.

No, it's actually the opposite.

Pretty much an NBT sitch.

No big thang.

The word is "thing," and the thing is big.

We believe someone is after the missing $21 million,

and solving this murder could lead us to the money.

Sure, but that money's, like, 25 years old.

It's probably not even good anymore.

Sorry. Cramped up.

This is a very important case, Raymond,

to me, and to the city of New York.

I'm not sure the Nine-Nine has the resources

to deal with something of this magnitude.

I understand the politics.

This is a high-profile case.

Do what you must.

What I was going to say is,

since you don't have the resources,

I'll give you anything you need.

The case is yours. You have my full support.

What?

He meant that more excited. Like, "What!"

Okay, two of the Fulton Street Four are dead.

My hunch... one of them is killing off his co-scums

so he can keep the money for his scum-self.

We'll start with Reggie Bludsoe.

He listed a Brooklyn address with his parole officer.

We're gonna nail this son of a bitch.