Imposters

Previously on "Imposters"...

- Oh, my God. - Mazel tov!

Yeah, I think we've been robbed.

My wife's car is here, but she's...

I'm worried she's been kidnapped or...

Hi, Ez.

Credit cards, the checking account, cash.

It's a shock.

You will replay every moment we shared together,

think about every person we met along the way.

Who the hell are you?

Federal Burro of Investigation.

Did you say "burro"?

Who are you?

I am her husband... just like you.

We married the same woman, and she took us both.

She's out there, probably working some new guy,

looking like some new chick.

I'm supposed to fall in love with this guy?

Gary Heller... managing director of the Pacific Bank and Trust.

I bet his bark is worse than his bite.

That's what the last two girls said.

What do you know about facial-recognition software?

- So the initial fee is... - 1,000 American dollars.

You will never find me.

Mr. Heller?

Hi. I'm Saffron Keyes.

Every few years, I like to try new places, new faces.

Hi. I'm Saffron Keyes.

Showtime.

He's ready to see you now.

Mr. Heller?

Hi.

I'm Ms. Keyes. You can call me Saffron.

Yes, Ms. Keyes... Saffron.

- Please come in. Take a seat. - Thank you.

As you know, I'm looking for a new assistant.

- My job is a very big one. - Assistant?

I thought I was here to sell you Girl Scout cookies.

Would you like to try one? They're very delicious.

You're being funny. You're funny.

- That's good. - Good. I'm glad I can be funny.

I usually get "adorable" or "cute" or "hot."

Blech.

Yes, well... Let's see.

Uh, Philadelphia Savings Bank, Montclair Insurance.

These are all excellent references.

What brings you to Seattle?

Well, I guess you can call me somewhat of a free spirit.

Every few years, I like to try new places, new faces.

- A free spirit in banking. - Mm-hmm.

I'm not sure that that's a thing.

Oh, don't get me wrong.

I can be quite serious.

Funny again.

Thanks again.

Boy, if you keep flattering me like this,

who knows what will happen in here?

- Excuse me? - Uh...

- Do you think I'm an idiot? - I was just joking.

Do you think you can just waltz in here,

bat your eyelashes, and get this job?

- No. - Do you think I've never f... ed

a pretty girl in my life before?

- Mr. Heller, I didn't mean... - You can leave now.

Now!

Someone must've really done a number on you.

What did you just say to me?

I said...

whoever broke your heart

must've really done a number on you.

You don't know a damn thing about me.

I know what hurt looks like.

I see it all over you,

and I know how it can harden a person.

But you see, I made a choice to not let it get to me.

And you, mister, well, you or some people...

they let it make them mistrustful...

I mean "mistrustable."

M-mistrusting... whatever that stupid word is.

I think it's mistrusting.

- Don't you laugh at me. - I'm not. I'm not.

I swear, Ms. Keyes, I'm not.

I suppose I just... "mistrustabled" you.

Right?

Look, I may have overreacted,

and for that, I apologize.

Apology accepted.

Would you still like to be my assistant?

Really?

I thought I totally blew it.

You were right about one thing.

I am untrusting.

Professional hazard, let's say.

So be loyal.

Yeah?

Absolutely.

You can count on me.

15 months, 2,000 miles,

and I finally found her.

5 1/2 weeks and 9 miles, and I finally found her.

Yeah, I also got my life ripped apart.

Oh, and by the way, the spy shop was my idea,

so I guess I really did find her.

Yeah, but I found you first, bro... you didn't find me.

- I didn't know you existed. - Exactly.

First I found you, and now I found Alice.

And now I'm gonna take her ass back to Scottsdale,

and after a few special nights

which remind her of this thing I do with my pinkie,

she's all yours.

Nice. Very classy.

What, you don't want one more night with Ava?

There is no Ava.

I want to know who she really is.

Oh, that's her.

Thank you. This... this is great.

Yeah, but it's all crossed out.

Where's the intel on her 20?

Her location.

Oh, I have her 20, full address...

Take you right to the front door... all right here.

- Can you get it for us, please? - Relax, man.

I'd love to get it for you. You got $5,000?

- What? - What?

No, no, no, we gave you $1,000 to find her.

You must be the smart one.

And the pretty boy here is the muscle.

$1,000 to find her,

$5,000 if you want to see the intel.

- You've got to be joking. - That's bullshit, man.

- Knock, knock. - Who's there?

I don't do jokes. See you when you got $5,000.

Hey, man, I don't think you...

- Whoa! - Hey, whoa, dude.

Everyone just relax. Everything's fine.

If everything in this world is fine,

I'd be out of business.

You see my titties?

Do you see my titties?

- I don't see no titties. - No, no, no, no.

That's right, bitches, 'cause I ain't your mama.

Now, until you have my 5 large, get the hell out of my store.

- Okay. - Okay.

- We'll do that. - Okay.

Just throw that down right here.

Thanks for the help.

You could use a little upper-body work.

I made a projected inventory,

price-inflation- towards-reduction chart.

According to my calculations,

we should clear 7 to 10 grand, no problem.

Really? Good. That's great.

Yeah. Just let me do the selling, all right?

Once I'm on a roll, try not to get in my way.

Yeah, God forbid I should keep you

from getting shot in the face.

Oh, did you keep me from getting shot in the face,

puppy-dog eyes?

That dude's an asshole.

He needs to learn a lesson.

Okay, I get it. Just keep your temper.

All right, last chance, man.

Anything you want to save?

Sell it all.

Who wants to buy some goodies?

You do.

What's up, man?

All right, let's go see this.

Five bucks more, and it's all yours, buddy.

All right. Awesome.

Awesome, ladies.

That's a good find.

Yes, ma'am.

Enjoy that purse. I'll take it.

Thank you very much, ladies. That is such a beautiful dress.

I think it would look great on you.

You know, you can go try it on, if you'd like, right inside.

It's really nice.

Do you like it?

I bought you that dress.

I know, chéri.

Perhaps you want to keep this one.

Little memento, no?

- What do you think? - You look incredible.

You can't not buy it.

I'll take it.

- Good call. - How much?

Actually, that one's free. Take it.

Oh, are you sure? Let me give you something for it.

Take it right now, and it's free.

Otherwise you can deal with Glengarry Glen Ross over here.

Okay. Uh, well, thanks.

You're welcome. Have a good one.

Dude, if you let emotion get in the way of selling...

I bought Ava that dress,

and I needed it gone, so let it go.

- I don't care... - Let it go.

- Fine. - How we doing?

Well, with 79% of our inventory gone,