Hap and Leonard

Come on.

It's time to be a bird.

Go on.

Come on, get.

You got your whole life ahead of you.

We didn't intend to cut you out.

There wasn't enough money to go around.

And this...

wasn't what we banked on.

So this is plan B.

And whose plan is that?

We made a pact.

There wasn't enough money for our needs.

We'd have to appropriate your share.

Howard says it's just a matter of priorities.

Huh. Oh, for a minute there,

I thought we were just getting screwed.

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

You want to keep that good eye, keep your hand off my shit.

Shut up!

Does Trudy know about this?

It's not personal, Hap.

Oh, good, good.

What is it, then?

Sacrifice.

Speed it up.

At this rate, we'll be here all night.

Come on.

Who the hell buries money anyway?

Y'all been reading too many damn caper books.

With all these cops around, it's called being smart.

Maybe you two ought to try it some time.

If you're so smart,

why are you burying this in front of us?

- Hey! - Hey, hey, hey.

It's an awful lot of rough housing for a peacenik.

Now, look, you had that coming.

Ow.

Look, I never said I was against violence.

Sometimes the ends justify the means.

All right?

So why don't you come over here and try that on me?

Shove that gun so far up your ass

you's taste gunpowder.

Come on!

Chub,

put the box in the hole.

Go ahead. I got it.

All right, Leonard.

You fill it in.

Pretend it's a rose bush or something,

whatever the hell you two do for work...

- They got fired. - All right.

Whatever... you know, whatever you did for work.

So this how y'all do, huh?

All peaceful-like.

Get your gun up.

Hey.

Look like you gonna have to use that thing, Howard.

Ever kill a man before?

I did.

Paco, fill it in.

These fellers have stepped in the wrong pile of shit.

Let's not rub it in.

They've been riding me since they got here.

If I'd have known I was coming...

Hey.

I'd have ridden you a hell of a lot harder.

This is everything.

This is... this is the total.

The rest is unusable.

Well, it's... it's not enough.

If we're smart about things, efficient,

no more mistakes from here on out.

Y'all already made one mistake:

pissing me off!

You gonna use that, Chub?

Just let us do our thing. We'll let you go.

Howard doesn't want anybody to know about us yet.

You ain't got to worry about me telling nobody.

No, sir.

Think I want the world to know I got suckered

by a bunch of idiots?

What is this thing?

You zip it, Chub.

Not supposed to say.

Come on.

Who we gonna tell, the couch?

We're gonna buy some drugs.

Oh.

What, like, like grass?

- Uh-uh, cocaine. - Cocaine?

- Chub! - Chub!

You stupid shit.

All right, okay.

What the hell does buying cocaine

have to do with making a difference to this world, huh?

That wasn't part of the big pitch you sold me.

If we're gonna launch a sustainable movement,

we need sustainable income.

They're gonna use cocaine to fund their cause.

How do you think the Mechanics survived as long as we did?

By selling sweet Mary Jane to college students.

Cocaine's a bit different.

- Don't you think? - Exactly.

- Who buys cocaine? - Cokeheads, mostly.

People who can afford it.

It's a luxury drug.

Consider us a luxury tax.

We're gonna take it from the rich,

and we're gonna use it to help the people that need it.

Like Robin Hood.

Last I remember, Little John didn't have no pager.

Y'all just a bunch of goddamn drug dealers.

No, no, we use the system to beat the system,

and then we change the system.

You can beat my meat and preach about the system

and the seals all you want...

Who said anything about the seals?

What's with the seals? Why does he keep saying that?

Whales, elephants, whatever.

You know what happens to drug dealers, hmm?

They end up in prison or in a ditch

with a bullet in the head.

Actually, that don't sound like a bad idea.

Paco's done this before.

He's got the connections.

Yeah, look at him now.

They handle the traffic. We handle the income.

We stay clean.

Yeah, and then we have the power.

Power?

You lost your drawers in the swamp.

What the hell you gonna do with any damn power?

What makes you think we need an economics lesson

from two out-of-work field hands?

Technically, we're Rosarians, not field hands.

You two ain't thought this shit out, did you?

Ignore him, Trudy.

You might have saved a couple of lives,

but you're gonna ruin a bunch more.

Think them drugs just gonna reach the hands

of some Hollywood big shot or up the nose

of some Wall Street scumbag?

They're gonna end up on the street

in the hands of some kids don't even know

what they hell they doing.

Don't listen to him.

He's just being derisive.

- Oh, that's a big word... - Quiet.

For such a little asshole to fart.

All right, that's enough.

That was impressive.

You rehearse that?

Nice girlfriend you got there.

Got more faces than a diamond.

Okay.

I admit that.

That took me by surprise.

And here we are,

gun in face, duct-taped to a chair.

Mm, mm, mm.

Glider.

What?

- It's a glider. - It's my damn porch.

- I know what it is. - Just saying.

You said enough, talking me into this mess.

- My nose itches. - I don't care.

Oh, shit.

Shit.

Maybe we didn't think this through enough.

It's a little late to start second-guessing ourselves.

I thought this was what we wanted.

Of course it is, babe.

Of course.

I just want us to stay sharp.

We've never done anything like this before.