Monsters vs. Aliens

Oh, yeah, it's freaky.

1x18 - Screaming Your Calls

Behold! My crowning achievement!

Two thoughts: One, I love it. Two, where is it?

- Down here. - Oh, your new phone?

Is something wrong with it, Dr. C?

Because I think that's gonna void the warranty.

Yes, something's wrong! They advertize it as a smartphone,

yet it is incapable of independent thought.

So I did some tinkering and now...

This smartphone is a sentient phone!

It's alive!

Booting up. Stock market's down 15.4 points.

It's your turn on "wordzy."

And you've got three new texts.

Why, thank you, Smarty.

Doc, are you saying your phone is alive?

Like alive-alive?

Yep, and I'm jacked into the internet 24/7.

I know it all. Literally.

Oh, yeah? Then what's the atomic weight of rubidium?

85.4678. Nailed it.

I have no idea if that's right. I just wanted to sound smart.

- Is rubidium even a thing? - Ooh! Let me try.

If you're so smart, then what color am I?

Blue.

Guys, Smarty knows everything.

Of course!

Daddy made me fully functional.

Daddy?

I'll just put my bed next to yours.

That way you can read me bedtime stories every night.

Okay, Dad?

Fine, Smarty. Fine.

Susan, Link.

This is, not to put too fine a point on it, weird.

Maybe not. I mean, you created Smarty.

You gave him life.

- So you kind of are his father. - True.

And, unlike some of your other creations,

this one isn't trying to mangle, eat, or disintegrate anybody.

- Which I find refreshing. - Refreshing?

Look, he just wants to be your son. I say give it a try.

You make good points. Perhaps I will try.

What are we gonna do now, Dad?

A better question, Smarty, Is what aren't we going to do?

We could launch a modest-sized rocket packed with thousands of mirrors.

26,571 at a diameter of 21 inches.

With precise interval delivery timing,

we could, indeed, put a smiley face on the Moon.

Then whenever we looked up at the night sky,

we'd think of each other.

I like seeing Doc like this, all fatherly.

- It's a new side to him. - Uh-huh.

Though I'm still waiting on

the mangling-eating- disintegrating stuff.

'Cause you know that's coming.

The bug has started a family, eh?

I smell opportunity.

Yo, little Earth phone. I'm Coolverton.

Coolverton?

Yes, that's my name, yo. Coolverton.

And I'm very rad and... slamming.

Okay, Coolverton. Gotta go.

Say! Have you tried the latest extreme apps?

They are totally a bag of chips.

Ooh! Apps?

Carry the two and... ah, Smarty, there you are!

What's the square root of 37?

6.0827625303.

Thank you. Oh, and 42 cubed?

74,088.

Very good. One more. What's...

Gotten into you, lad?

A burp app, Dadster.

Look, I can do the alphabet.

A, B, C...

Child, where did you get such a grotesque app?

- A friend showed it to me. - Well, delete it now.

It's sure to corrupt your operating system.

- But I... - Delete it.

- I was...I... - Delete it.

Are your audio sensors not working? De-lete!

But it's not fair!

"Not fair." Classic. I used that one on my Dad all the time.

Life's not fair.

You live under my roof, you live under my rules.

Oh! I remember my folks saying that when I was just a tadpole.

More like I live under your thumb.

Don't get smart with me, young man!

Aw, my mom would have said the same thing.

If she hadn't been, you know, a tomato.

Can't help it, Dad. I know everything, remember?

Oh, and one more thing.

I... did you hear any of that?

- Unh-uh. - Nope.

Every last word.

Are your audio sensors working?

What's up, Smarty? Why you all... bugging?

Um, yo?

My Dad said I can't keep the burp app you gave me.

Sounds like he's up in your grill and dissing yo.

You. Yo. Which is ridonkulous,

because I bet you have mad "skills-zzz."

I bet you could even hack into Area 50-something's mainframe.

Well, yeah! If I wanted to.

Then you could drop in this awesome-sauce app I created.

It's called "Phones totally rule, OMG!"

Yeah, maybe I will.

Do it, I say!

Then your father will see you are slamming and rad.

Uh, what-what?

Mornin', Sam.

Beyond easy.

So when I say, "keep my seat warm," that's just an expression!

General, again, I want to apologize

for my unfortunate misinterpretation.

Tell it to my slacks, Sqweep!

Hello, everybody!

- Smarty? - Hey, Dad!

How'd that get on my screen? This is a secure connection!

Oh, I'm not just on this screen.

I'm on every screen on the base!

Smarty, you log out, right this instant.

Here's a notification, Dad. You're not the boss of me.

I've plugged into the computer core

and completely taken control of the entire base!

Everything on this base answers to me!

It's my house now, Dad. My rules.

Ow!

Emergency lock-down.

Uh-oh.

Lock-down? Doctor, get your phone in line,

or I'm gonna take it offline!

Smarty, you stop this at once

or I will put you in airplane mode for a week.

Dad, I'm not doing it. Not on purpose.

Something's making me.

Smarty's been infected with a malware program called

- "Phones totally rule, OMG!" - A virus? Can we remove it?

Negative. It blocks any attempts to disable it.

Perfect.

I mean, perfectly horrible situation.

Whatever shall we do?

Dad, help me! I'm scared.

Fear not, my boy! I'm on my way.

Ooh! Usually these slide open automatically.

There are other ways to the computer core.

You know how they say, "if you see 1 cockroach

there are 1,000 more in the walls"?

Tell me that's not even slightly true.

No, it's very true. Cockroaches love traveling by walls.

I just need to find access.

Hey!

- Dad! - Son!

Now, I'm just going to unplug you.

What?

If you do that, the virus will make the base self-destruct.

Seriously, we need to rethink this whole "base self-destruct" thing.

We come up against it, like, every other day.

Then we have no choice but to remove the virus from Smarty.

There's only one way to do that, Dad. Memory wipe.

You can't!

What a deliciously horrible predicament!

Sacrifice the base or erase his son!

Whatever will he do?

Doc, there must be some other way.

I'm afraid there isn't.

Bye, Dad.

Poor little guy.

So, who's up for ice cream?

How can you be so heartless? You just erased your son!

Yeah, Doc, that's way cold-blooded, even for a half-insect.

What kind of monster do you take me for?

Smarty automatically backs up every five minutes.

Rise and shine, Smarty.

Hey, Dad! What's up?

Mmm!

Good news, Monsters!

The top brass was very impressed with the virus infiltration.

Wait. They thought that was a good thing?

Proved our system is vulnerable.

That's why they'd like Smarty to be

part of their cyber-security task force.

Really? Awesome!

I'm proud of you, son. Be sure to visit.

I will, Dad. And I'll text.

A lot. Like, all the time.

Splendid.

1x19 The Time-Out That Wouldn't End

Greetings and welcome to another informative edition

of Earth studies! For today's entry:

Behold, a local classic. The baking soda volcano.

Built to scale.

- No. - Please?

- No. - Please?