The Who: The Kids Are Alright

24, 26.

Oh, my God.

Joni, there are so many hotties in your class.

You are so gonna hook up the first week.

Just because you're a 24-hour drive-thru doesn't mean everyone else has to be.

Hey, she worked her ass off.

She deserves some hot jock sausage.

Gross. That's disgusting.

Why don't you guys just do it and get it over with?

What? I'm just saying.

Maybe because we're friends.

B minus in geometry, dude.

This shit is the bomb.

Add that shit up.

Don't be such a bitch, dude.

Yeah.

Hey, ladies! Come on, take it down a notch.

Hey! Hey! What did I just say, huh?

Come here. Come here, big boy. Let's see what you got.

Come on, get him!

Come on, what you got? Let's see it. Come on.

Come on, Dad. Your pits smell like burnt ass.

Burnt ass? - Yeah.

Get out of here. Take it to his house.

Laser, cut it out. That's driving me crazy.

I'm not doing anything. Calm down.

You calm down.

Hi, guys.

Hey, babe.

Hey, Mom. - Sorry I'm late.

No, don't worry. We just started.

Come on. That's enough.

Oh, my God. 27 fibroids.

All in the lining.

That's disgusting.

Yeah. We're eating.

Wow. Did they do that laparoscopically?

That's right, smart girl. We got them all.

Hey, whose truck is that?

Mine.

Yours?

Isn't it wicked?

Mmm-hmm.

For the business.

What business?

Oh, you mean the gardening?

Isn't it landscape design?

Thank you very much.

I got a great deal. It was super cheap.

Okay. Do we have any more of the Fiddlehead?

I don't know. I didn't look, honey.

Hey, what's up? - Yo, what's up, dude?

Laser, no phone calls at the table, all right?

Dude, I shaved my dog.

Are you still feeling it?

Yeah. Hey, let me hit you back.

For sure.

Who's that?

That was nobody. Just Clay.

Can I ask you something?

What do you get from your relationship with Clay?

What do you mean 'get'?

Well, we just feel like he's a little untended.

Do you think he's the kind of person who's gonna help you grow?

Hey, did you get started on those thank-you notes for the birthday presents?

Mom, you're windshield wiping. Come on.

Not yet, but I will. - Okay.

I just think it's better to knock them out when it's fresh.

Yeah, I'll do them tonight.

I mean, you don't want to have to start with an apology. You know?

Then it's embarrassing.

Mom, I know.

It's okay, honey. She got it.

Let it go.

Okay. I'll let it go.

I mean, if it was up to you,

our kids wouldn't even write thank-you notes.

You know, they'd just send out good vibes.

That's not nice.

Do you believe our baby's 18?

No, I can't.

You big girl.

Such a big girl.

Big girl. Big girl.

Mom. - What?

Oh. Thank you.

Hey. - Hey.

What are you doing?

Writing my thank-you notes.

That's good.

You know, you don't have to start with an apology.

Yeah, that'd be embarrassing.

That's terrible.

Hey, have you thought any more about making that call?

Yeah, I don't want to.

How can you not even be curious about it?

Look, I'm leaving soon, and I don't want to have to deal with that right now.

Also, that could really hurt Moms' feelings.

God, why do you have to worry about them so much?

They don't even have to know about it.

Look, you can do it when you turn 18, okay?

I never ask you for anything.

I just don't understand why you bought the truck now.

Because if I'm gonna start this business,

I need something to haul my equipment in.

Okay. It just seems a little cart before the horse.

What does that mean?

Well, sweetie, you don't have any clients yet.

You know,

you're the one who's always telling me to act 'as if.'

That's true. I do. You're right.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's good you bought the truck.

It's proactive. - Yeah.

Hey, you wanna watch a movie?

A movie-movie?

Yeah. We haven't done that in a while.

All right.

You know, I don't like the guys in this one.

They're too shaved.

Don't focus on it.

Okay.

Fuck. Oh, my God.

Hey, hey, I'm cold.

I can't breathe, honey.

Well...

Shit!

Shit!

Where's the remote? Where's the remote?

Oh, my God.

The whole neighborhood heard that.

No, they didn't.

Shit.

That was a vibe kill.

Hey, hey, Brooke, can you do me a favor?

Can you get that Swiss chard for me?

Sure, no problem.

Thanks.

How are you? - Hey, Paul.

Hey, foxy.

Hey.

Mmm.

Flapjack, you are smelling ripe.

Oh, sorry.

That's all right. I kind of like it.

Oh, yeah? - It's earthy.

I've been out in the garden hoeing.

How are we doing tonight? - It's gonna be tight.

Oh, really?

Go to work.

See you.

Hello?

Hi. Is this Paul Hatfield?

Yes, it is. Who's this?

My name is Wendy Mitner, and I'm calling from The Pacific Cryobank.

Okay, Wendy Mitner. What can I do for you?

I just need to confirm that this is the same Paul Hatfield

that donated sperm with us between 1991 and 1993.

Yeah, I did a little bit of that back then, sure.

Well, as you know, the Cryobank has a confidentiality policy

which prohibits us from releasing your identity

without your consent.

No... Yeah, yeah, yeah, I knew that.

Well, we've been contacted

by a young woman conceived using your donation,

and she's asked if you'd be open to having contact with her.

Yeah, I'd be conceivably into something like that. Yeah.

Great, Mr. Hatfield. I'll let her know and get back in touch soon.

Thanks.

Oh...

I mean, I was 19 years old.

It was, like, just so long ago. I totally forgot about it.

I never thought they'd ever use my stuff.

Why not?

Well, I'd use it.

Oh, baby.

It's weird.

There's a kid out there. I mean, I'm kind of curious, I think.

Yeah? - Yeah.

So what are you gonna do?

I don't know. What would you do?

I don't know.

You got to figure it out.

Yeah, no doubt.

All right, I got to go now. - All right.

Thanks for coming. It was really nice.

I'll see you tomorrow.

So, drive safe.

M-E-R. 'Zoomer.'

No way.

That is so not a word.

No, it totally is.

That's not a word. - If you're gonna zoom somewhere,

then you're a zoomer. A person who zooms.

So that would be... Let's see, that's 31...

Hello?

Hi. I'm looking for Joni Allgood.

Yeah, this is she.

Hey.

This is Paul, your donor.

Eleven points for Mommy.