Heels

Previously on Heels...

Man, we are losing money.

We are losing so much fuckin' money.

I'm such a fuckin' failure.

What's going on here, Willie?

Tom and I made an agreement years ago

that we would do whatever we need to do

to keep this place alive,

and you don't need to worry about what those things are.

Are they legal? -Some are.

Well, whatever those other ones are,

we're not doing 'em anymore.

For those of you wondering what was that,

that was The Condamned.

Ace Spade is back.

Dystopia was supposed to end the night up with a ring invasion.

Instead, we end the night down in front of a thousand people.

I am not used to having to run everything by a partner.

Get used to it!

Or the lawsuit is back on!

So I have some thoughts on how this should go.

Why should I let you book what happens in my ring

and trust that you're actually gonna go through with it?

Well, first off, you get to punch me in the face.

Yay, Dad. -Yeah. Yay, me.

Last year, total revenue

from professional wrestling was 1.095 billion.

I guess I could grow to love professional wrestling.

Brooks Rizzo just texted.

He's gonna be a little bit late.

We're not gonna start the show without him.

So meet him out there for will-call,

sit next to him during the show.

If he needs anything, get it to him.

You were right about the women's league.

We'll make Gully put you in a match with one of his women.

You get in that ring at Dystopia

and just say, "Shove it up your ass.

I'm here to sparkle."

And I'll be there to protect you.

Hey, listen up, Crystal.

This right here is a two-year contract for you to join FWD.

You get the hell away from her.

You cannot buy Crystal Tyler.

She's no sellout...

like you!

Nice writing, Jack.

Wherever you are, Jack Spade,

this isn't over.

Dystopia for life!

Excuse me.

Somebody told me that you work with Crystal Tyler

and the Spade brothers. -I do.

I'm Brooks Rizzo.

I would love to know more about them.

Like what?

Everything.

Number three on the Dick Valentino

"Top Ten Swerves of the Week" is not out of WWE,

Ring of Honor, or New Japan,

but Florida Wrestling Dystopia.

In the build-up to what's shaping up to be

a hot cross-promotion, "God of Chaos" Charlie Gully

has stolen DWL's Crystal Tyler

away from Jack Spade...

and signed her to a new contract.

Visit Dystopia's Instagram

to see clips of this one, folks.

This gal's a star!

The Duffy Wrestling League out of Southwestern Georgia

has had a notable run recently,

with the defection of Rooster Robbins,

the injury to Bobby Pin,

and the addition of Rabid Ricky Rabies

and Hall of Famer Wild Bill Hancock to their roster.

Absent in all of this

has been the Luchador Diego Cottonmouth.

Maybe Jack Spade just is not a fan

of Diego Cottonmouth anymore.

But the big story is The Condamned,

the DWL's new hooded hell-raiser

on a vengeance tour.

Watch out for this guy, folks.

Your friend Dick Valentino will invite The Condamned

to discuss the drama at work and play

in the hallowed halls of the DWL.

If you're making a mess, make sure you clean it up.

I'm making a vision board.

It's a tool to help me

manifest my goals for my new gimmick,

"The Condamned," in the ring

but also my own personal goals in life.

You seem to distractedly be doing

a lot of very uncharacteristic stuff.

Not distractedly. Intentionally.

Mama, I'm realizing that...

I always looked at my mistakes as like...

malfunctions instead of what they are--

choices, made by a dude who's led an unexamined life.

Unexamined because I've always been preoccupied,

playing four sports a year,

always in the car going to practice,

at practice, from practice, from a game,

working out, recovering, resting,

always trying to improve so I can compete,

leaving no room for just...

thinkin',

contemplating, reflecting.

How can I be a part of a greater good?

How can I be a light and help.

And if we don't do that, then we're just...

wingin' it.

I don't wanna wing it anymore.

That's all fine.

But you appear to be

wildly swingin' from branch to branch like a monkey.

Leaving Duffy, returning to Duffy.

Hatin' wrestling, rediscovering it.

Merging a gimmick with real life,

callin' that the result of reflection.

So while you are transforming "winging it" into your vision

for who you should be, consider the following:

earnin' a living.

Now, unless you're certain that that glue

isn't gonna wind up all over my dining room table,

you lay some newspaper down.

Need us for background, Chief?

Uh, no, I'm good.

Wait. -Don't lecture me.

One word is not a lecture. -It is from you.

Please wait till we get good news.

We may not get good news.

Then save it until we get bad news

so there's more for us to drown our sorrows with together.

I gotta say, Bill, it's all so excitin'!

Amen! We are on the verge, Willie.

What do y'all think Ted Turner's really like?

Ted Turner's just a good ole boy.

Stop movin' 'less you wanna get real stuck like a pig.

I can't believe Ted Turner's

even talkin' about us wrestling on TV!

Because his man Eric Bischoff's seen what we do.

'Cause word's out about how we do what we do.

Now Ted's about to pay us to do more of what we do.

W-C-W!

W-C-W!

W-C-W!

I'm gonna go ahead and stash the liquor in the bathroom.

People get judge-y about booze at work nowadays.

Good idea. -I have them on occasion.

Hey. Just be yourself.

Seems to be workin' for me.

I was talking to Jack.

Ace, look at you, all geared up.

Very method.

It's what he came to see, ain't it?

Damn it!

What? What's wrong?

I forgot the crown. Should I go home and get it?

I think we're good.

Okay. He's here.

Brooks? Hi. -All right.

Deb's gonna bring him up.

Well, good luck to the both of you then.

Every question he asks, ask three of him.

People love talking about themselves.

So, ferme la bouche.

Always a good strategy. -Yeah.

Ferme la bouche, la douche.

Okay. Well, you text us if you need rescuing.

Oh, we got this. -All right, good, good luck.

That's pretty wet--you're gonna wanna wipe that off.

You think he's gonna be all right?

Time will tell. -Maybe we should go back in.

We weren't invited. -Exactly my point.

Here we go again.

Stay present and preoccupied.

Focus elsewhere for more productive ends.

Let's rustle up the troops.

If we're gonna take this promotion to the next level,

we gotta get a whole lot better at this one,

tout suite!

Staci Spade, lookin' sharp. -Morning, Bill.

Morning, Willie. -Morning.

Did the meeting start? -Just about to, I believe.

Do I have any food in my teeth?

My eyes are terrible.

You're good. -Thanks.

Fingers crossed.

I don't get it. Jack doesn't invite us,

the two people who made this possible, and he invites her?

Why?

First of all, because she's his wife.

Second, same reason I'd invite her

if I was having that meeting.

A smart woman makes any man look smarter and stable.

Just like you do for me, ravishing princess.

I gotta get in the Dome.

My master class is about to begin.

Yesterday, in a surprise verdict,