MacGyver

MacGYVER: You never know where life's going to take you.

This is especially true when you've got a friend

like Penny Parker.

So I wasn't too surprised when she called one day

and told me she had inherited a mansion,

and would I mind coming to look the place over?

But she only stayed there one night,

and after that she had the place locked up.

Wouldn't tell anybody what happened to her.

That was almost 20 years ago.

So, Uncle Fred told...

MacGYVER: There was a long story

behind the way Penny came into her inheritance

and she was in no hurry to shorten it.

In high school geometry, I learned

the shortest distance between two points is a straight line,

but when telling a story,

Penny always takes the scenic route.

Hold it.

I think I hear a point coming up.

Anyway, he told me how Aunt Betty's estate

goes to the nearest female relative

on her 25th birthday,

and today is my 25th birthday,

and I'm the closest female relative

and before I know it, I'm an heiress.

Isn't that wild?

And it was Pembroke who told me that the house is haunted.

Uh! Now, we agreed...

Okay, okay, I won't say any more.

Just talking about ghosts gives me the shivers anyway.

Penny, I'm sorry.

The supernatural is just an easy way

to explain what we can't understand.

Well, at least it won't be so scary with you there to look after me.

Trick or treat! Trick or treat!

See anything?

It's too dark.

Oh, sorry. Thought you folks were trick-or-treaters.

Hi. We're here about the Parker house. I'm Penny.

The lawyer told me you'd drop by.

This is my friend MacGyver.

Sylvia Lange.

I've got the keys to the house right back here.

The gas and water have been turned on

and the water's working,

but the pipes are liable to be a little rusty.

Folks sure take Halloween seriously around here.

The kids like it.

Oh, by the way, the phone company says

they won't be able to send out a man until next week,

but I have a friend over there, and they may do better.

Pardon the rush, but I've got to finish

the sheriff's re-election ad in time for the next edition,

or he'll be steaming.

Did you know my Aunt Betty?

Oh, everybody in town knew Crazy Betty.

Crazy?

You mean, like, fun-loving and carefree?

I mean crazy. Loopy as a loon.

Oh, Betty was a nice sort of crazy,

but she was crazy -- especially near the end.

When did she die?

Well, nobody knows for sure.

You see, Betty disappeared a couple of years

after her daddy was gunned down by some gangster friends

who tried to muscle in on his business.

Aunt Betty's father was a gangster?

Bootlegger. Made the best white lightning in the state.

When they repealed Prohibition,

he moved into the gambling racket

and got blasted full of holes for his trouble.

Oh, how awful.

Pushed Betty right over the edge.

She stayed shut up in that old house all alone.

One day she just... left town for good.

That was in '58.

30 years to the day, in fact.

On Halloween night.

- They never found her, huh? - Not a trace.

Even called in the FBI.

After seven years, they declared her dead.

Have you ever heard any...

weird stories about the house?

You mean about it being haunted?

I told you.

Every child in these parts

tells stories about the old Parker place being haunted.

Of course, they outgrow it eventually.

Sounds good.

Thanks for your help.

Can we stop and pick up some things at the grocery store?

Sure.

Betty?

What a creepy place.

MacGYVER: Oh, it's just an old house.

What's the matter?

Uh...

Just my imagination. I...

I have a right to be jumpy.

I'm an heiress.

I guess I am nervous.

Here, let me try.

You first.

Hey, Penny. Come on in. Take a look.

See? Told you.

Nothing to be afraid of.

That's easy for you to say.

I'm the one who found out that I'm related to a gangster

and a madwoman.

Well, you know, that doesn't surprise me.

What?

What I mean is...

every family's got a black sheep in the pack.

There any black sheep in your family?

You're looking at him.

Why don't you take a look around?

I'm going to unload the Jeep.

Promise you won't be too long?

I'll be right outside.

Aw, man.

Penny!

Penny, I'm locked out!

MacGyver! Wait till you see what I found!

I bet this was Aunt Betty's room.

Look at the wallpaper and linens.

Everything's so beautiful and feminine.

It's like nothing's been touched in here for years.

MacGyver, we could be the first people

to set foot in here since she disappeared.

I don't think so.

There's not enough dust.

Looks like somebody's been keeping it up.

But who?

This is spooky.

Look at all these dresses.

Oh, these are beautiful.

Boy, Aunt Betty had expensive taste.

Looks like she could have used a good diet, though.

Huh.

Where have I heard that before?

[THUNDER ROARS, MUSIC BOX CRASHES]

Oh, no.

Oh, wow!

MacGyver, look at this.

MacGyver?

This isn't funny.

MacGyver?

Surprise!

For the birthday girl.

You shouldn't have.

Oh, yes, I should have.

And you even made it yourself.

How can you tell?

Well, it's a little crooked.

Yeah, I guess it got a little squished underneath my pack.

I wanted to surprise you.

Mmm!

Chocolate mint and banana icing.

You even remembered my favorite.

Yeah. Who could forget a combination like that?

Happy birthday, Penny.

You know you didn't have to do this.

I mean, just being here

so I don't have to be in this creepy old house by myself

is the best birthday present I could ever ask for.

Just make a wish, please.

Yeeeeee... yay!

Thank you.

Oh, the diary!

- What diary? - This diary.

I found it hidden in my Aunt Betty's music box.

By the way, are you any good at fixing music boxes?

"A Penny For Your Thoughts"?

My name is on it. This is getting really weird.

It is only a book, Penny.

No, it's not just the book.

It's this whole house.

Haven't you noticed how it closes in on you?

Like you're being watched all the time.

It's thinking like that

that's going to drive you absolutely nuts.

Now, repeat after me:

There's no such thing as ghosts.

There's no such thing as ghosts.

Come on. There's...

There's no such thing as ghosts.

There's no such thing as ghosts.

What was that?