Almost Family

Previously on Almost Family...

You have all your new sisters.

That must be a plus.

Yeah, except one is dating a coworker of mine,

and the other one is sleeping with a woman, which is great,

except she's married to a man.

- Tim wants to have kids. - So what do you want?

I don't know what I want.

I think that you two

are very different people.

- Wow, you are jealous. - I am not.

Oh, ooh, so you're the gay one.

Wait. You're gay?

- What the hell is wrong with you? - Everything.

I just wish you guys wouldn't keep secrets from me.

- You are seriously damaged. - I'm sorry.

I'm taking the subway. Good night.

Taxi.

I've always wanted to do that,

hail a taxi in New York.

Congratulations. Where to?

West End Avenue.

I'm going to see my father.

I still look like that, right?

_

Morning.

The silent treatment. I deserve that.

Look, I...

What I said about you,

I didn't mean to hurt your feelings,

and I clearly did, and I'm so sorry,

and I got you some of those yogurt drinks that you like.

Oh, wow. Okay.

They're gross anyway.

Rox, I'm so sorry.

These people will talk to me.

Don't you love the city this time of year?

Fall is so busy for me, though,

but you gotta find time for your personal life.

Am I right?

It beats unwinding with a glass of wine

or a bottle of wine.

A whole bottle.

Am I right?

It's just me alone,

which is how I spend most of my time.

Or at least that's how I feel lately because

everyone I know is... is mad at me.

Dating apps? Like, who does these?

Desperate. (LAUGHS)

Is this a Blue Hawaiian? Aloha.

Take me to the beach.

You're, like, too good-looking.

- (LAUGHS) - It's making me uncomfortable.

It's hot in here.

But when I saw your picture, I had to swipe right.

Not left, right. Swipe right.

Swipe right. Swipe right.

Swipe right.

This testimony from Roxy's mom is so brutal.

No matter how many times I read it...

Do you realize we haven't figured out

which train we're taking to D.C.?

For my grandmother's 80th birthday party.

I forgot. I'm so sorry.

If you're nervous, don't be,

because I told everyone, "No baby talk".

No, it's not that.

It's just that is it really smart for us

to both be out of the office

after Amanda just handed our asses to us?

That's nothing compared to what my mother will do

if we miss Nana's 80th birthday party.

You're right.

I don't wanna mess with your mom.

Right?

I'm scared.

All right, well... (CLEARS THROAT)

I guess there's a world where I can go

all the way there by myself.

If it wouldn't be too much trouble.

When you're ready to sing "Happy Birthday", call me.

I'll sing along.

It'll be great. It'll be just like I'm there.

Just like you're there.

Yeah.

Welcome to Round Offs. Breathe it in.

You smell that? That is the smell of victory.

Did you really train here?

Yeah, I did, and you will too.

Remember, you're only ever in competition with yourself.

Roxy? (LAUGHS)

Roxy Doyle?

Nina Bennett.

Wow, it's been a long time.

What are you doing here?

Just signing up my little grasshopper for tryouts.

- You? - Uh, yeah.

Same.

Oh, what a coincidence.

You know, truth be told,

we almost didn't sign up at all.

I mean, we weren't even sure we were gonna need this program

after our big win at Montclair Classic last week.

Oh, Montclair.

Wow, you're still doing that?

Well, we can't all be like you, you know,

in the big leagues, shilling for energy drinks.

Oh, that's right. They dropped you.

- Mm. - Ouch.

Yeah, well, uh, we're really busy,

but it was so good to see you.

You too. Good luck.

I really hope you stay healthy.

Who was that?

That was the enemy,

and the enemy must be destroyed at all cost.

A minute ago you said I was only in competition with myself.

Yeah, well, our lives were different then.

Now it's game on.

Let's get to work.

Oh, good.

Mrs. Peavy's coming in at 3:00 for counseling.

Uh, actually, it's for a referral.

Uh, we found a surgeon who's confident

he can resect her uterine septum.

She didn't want surgery.

She was considering other options,

even surrogacy.

What changed?

I talked some sense into her.

The procedure's hysteroscopic, minimally invasive,

takes an hour, tops.

She saw the wisdom.

That's a professional ringtone.

It's just a dating app. I thought I had it on silent.

You back on your dating app?

The paint's not even dry from the brother humper scandal.

- That's brave. - Oh, it's brave?

- I'm just dating. - No, I mean, you're right.

It's... it's nothing to be embarrassed about.

Wait, now it's embarrassing?

I don't know.

Look, I am a modern woman in New York City

and, yes, I'm dating,

but I'm dating judiciously,

and don't put too much pressure on Mrs. Peavy.

It's her choice, not ours.

Dr. Bechley?

Can I help you?

I'm Brian. Brian Madison.

You treated my parents at your clinic.

I found out that you're my biological father.

Oh?

I took the train from Des Moines to meet you

and... and the whole way I imagined

what this moment would be like.

Well, uh, as you know, there's a pending court case,

so I have to limit my interactions with...

That's what you have to say?

Some stupid legalese after everything you've done?

You don't just understand my position and...

My parents haven't stopped fighting after they found out.

- Very sorry to hear that, but... - They're splitting up now.

- Right. - You broke my family.

Well, okay, I made some mistakes, uh, Brian.

Many of them.

Uh, I was always just trying to help.

I... (BLOW LANDS)

We should have a description from the eyewitnesses soon,

but in the meantime,

we need two plainclothes officers

in front of Dr. Bechley's building.

- Yeah. - Hey.

What happened? Is he okay?

Yeah. He's a little shaken up.

Um, why is he not at a hospital?

He was. He left.

- They discharged him? - No.

He just left.

Got it.

Edie, I'm so sorry about what I did.

Why don't you get in there and make sure

Roxy isn't planning any vigilante justice?

I've got my hands full as it is.

No, no, no, no.

I don't want any trouble. I mean it, Julia.

- Are you okay? Yes.

- Who did this? - Oh, just one of my...