Cowboy Bebop

Shitbag corporations.

They control everything now.

Food.

Medicine.

Fuel!

Even this place.

Just got to squeeze every last drop of blood

out of the little guy, right?

Now, I do not like speaking in absolutes.

But I've got to tell you, fellas,

I absolutely wish every single one of these corporate, cockroach assholes

be taken out to the woods, and the woods set on fire!

This is taking too long, boss.

Norman, how we doing?

We're close, boss. Yeah.

Carol, I worked in a casino once.

Until they fired me.

For stabbing a pit boss in the eye.

And then he got fired

because what's the use of a one-eyed pit boss?

Am I right, Carol?

You know who had me fired, Carol?

Hmm?

No?

The shit-bag corporations.

You tell me.

Who do you work for?

Huh?

Oh, for the love of freaking God! Who's covering the elevators?

Floyd was up there!

What? Hey, you with the headphones!

Yeah.

The hell you think you're doing?

Me, oh, I, I just, um…

I came here to place a bet.

God damn, Spike! You were supposed to wait for my signal.

I was wondering when you'd show up.

Hey!

Come on, Spike, we have to take them alive!

How many times have I told you?

Yeah, what was that about taking them alive?

Shut up. You didn't kill Tanaka, did you?

-Uh-- -Drop the guns!

Not yet.

I am walking out of here!

Or she dies.

Or she dies? Wait, that's…

That's your hostage?

-Spike… -What is she? Like 80?

I mean, she looks like she's led a very full, rich life.

-Haven't you, ma'am? -Spike!

You've got kids, right? You're ready to go.

What the hell, Frank?

Who takes a shit in the middle of a heist?

Goddamn pigs!

Stay back!

Jesus Christ, is that a Disruptor?

Listen, buddy, you can't fire that thing in here.

Watch me, asshole.

Uh, Frank, let's take it easy with that thing, all right?

We're all going to be sensible, right?

Right, Spike?

I ain't screwing around, cop.

See, that's your mistake.

I'm not a cop.

And you're not worth that much.

Piece of shit, cowboy!

Damn.

So rude.

Hold on!

Jet!

Shit!

-I got him! -Go!

The shielding switch! Where is it?

It's over there!

You okay?

Yeah.

Just to be clear…

We don't get paid if we bring them in dead,

but damaged is okay?

I'd say very badly damaged would be A-okay.

Huh?

Who are you?

Just a humble bounty hunter, ma'am.

Transport Class Designation "BeBop."

We have you on approach.

Astro Gate toll will be deducted from your account.

I'm going to take a piss in transit.

Wanna charge me for that too?

We already do, BeBop.

-Read the fine print. -Jesus.

Papers are good. You are clear for travel.

We'll turn Tanaka in on Europa.

Assuming you don't kill him before we get there.

That's a big assumption.

I hope his price went up.

Kimmie has a birthday coming up

and you wouldn't believe how much a kid's doll costs.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Be nice to be out of the red for once.

Hmm.

All the shit you've been through,

you're overdue for some good luck.

-Am I right? -That's right, smart guy.

That sounded like you, admit it. Come on.

They can grow you a new arm, you know.

You know, sometimes when you lose something,

there's just no getting it back.

Any more fortune cookies you want to crack open, or can we eat now?

You work at being an asshole?

No, actually, it comes naturally. Unlike your arm.

Eat your damn peppers.

Yeah.

Are you sure this is the place?

Everything's going to be fine. Trust me.

May I have a glass of water?

No water today.

Does it look like I should be drinking tequila?

You look like you should be drinking nothing but tequila.

Got something for me?

Red Eye.

I can get you a hundred vials today.

Bullshit. You're wasting my time!

Listen.

You don't know what I've been through to get this.

It's real.

I need proof first.

If it is what you say it is, then we make a deal.

Then, we have cupcakes.

Cupcakes?

Yeah, who don't like cupcakes?

Show me.

Asimov.

Tell me. Tell me, what does it feel like?

It feels like I just mainlined God!

Hey.

You screwed up bad, Asimov.

You shouldn't take what's not yours.

The Syndicate wants their Red Eye back.

Shit. He's using!

Are you kidding me with this shit?

You know the drill.

Credit goes into your account, minus expenses.

And the station fees.

-Lookie here, buddy, you put-- -Next.

Next!

No.

Hey, buddy.

Is that Tanaka?

Kudos! But I could have sworn he had a crew of six, Jet.

I'm only seeing one here.

Thought you were working a case on Ganymede.

Well, my plans changed when I heard you were coming in.

Good haul?

Ah, pocket change for hauling in an anal fissure.

Piece of shit, cowboy.

One that walks with a limp.

That's pretty funny.

I'd say it's good to see you again, Chalmers,

but it wasn't.

Yeah.

Ah, shit.

Hey, Jet! Hold up.

Listen, there's a bounty coming up.

It's not on the wire yet. Some asshole shot up a bar on TJ.

Yeah?

Why are you giving it to me?

Personally, I wouldn't cross the street to piss on you if you were on fire,

but your ex-wife asked me to throw you a bone every now and again, so…

While you were throwing her your own bone, I bet.

Take it or leave it, pal.

I could give a shit.

-A hundred thousand? -Yeah.

Barely covers fuel. Never mind food.

I thought you said this bounty was going to go up?

Well, it did! Tanaka was worth $1.5 million!

We got charged for half the goddamn casino

floating out into space!

Hey, it's not our fault somebody brought a Disruptor to a robbery.

If you would have waited, like I told you, we could have controlled it!

Just a few of Tanaka's dogs could have offset the property damage.

But you had to kill them all, Spike.

In my defense, you tagged the guy with the gold grill,

just as you were telling me to take him alive, right?

See the look on his face, though?

He did look pretty shocked.

He was shocked and then he was dead.

Come on. I got a lead on a bounty.

Asimov Solensan.

Post-Earth refugee.

This is the big lead you got?

Doesn't look like he'll keep the lights on much less buy me a lobster dinner.

What about the Doleac bounty? I hear he's still out by the Belt.

I told you. Running after ship-jackers is a wild goose chase.

And this guy's right in front of us.

Last seen in New Tijuana.

T…

TJ, no. No TJ.

What now?

Do you know what I got the last time I was on TJ?