Haganai: I Don't Have Many Friends (僕は友達が少ない)

He looks so pissed off right now.

Yeah, like ready to punch pissed.

I hate it when he comes here.

He so freaks me out.

Here we go again.

Same old, same old.

Same old attitudes about me.

Same old after school whatever.

Same old Neighbors Club.

Hey, guys.

Sorry about that.

Wrong room.

Hey, get back here, Kodaka!

Don't you like my hair?

Totally.

Yeah, it looks great on you.

Well, thanks.

I mean, no!

I'm asking you if you think it's funny!

If it's funny?

Obvi.

Don't you remember yesterday we were talking about

making friends by being funny and entertaining?

I remember.

So, you did this?

The sign at the toy store said this thing was guaranteed

to be a hit, so I bought it.

You take this stuff too seriously.

I couldn't agree more.

As I suspected, the distinguished art form

known as comedy is well beyond Meat's capacity.

Oh come on; not you, too.

Today, I'm dressed up as one of the most laughable creatures

ever to exist.

Tell the truth; you know I'm hilarious right now.

Okay, then how about this?

You hooker!

I'm gonna murder you.

Woe is me; I'm just so like rich and pretty and like oh no.

You're so stupid; I don't sound like that!

You're right I like so don't sound like that,

I sound more like this.

Oh, look at me; I need attention...

I am not a laughable creature, you big jerk!

Besides, you're not even funny;

you're just annoying like normal.

That's awesome.

Welcome to my world; now you can see how much fun your crying

and bitching is for the rest of us.

Shut up.

You're awful.

Hey, Yozora?

I'm surprised you're not embarrassed to look that way.

Anyway.

You know, girls, true comedy is more than just cheap gimmicks.

No one who looks like you gets to be condescending.

Yeah.

Since you know so much,

why don't you show us this mystical "true comedy"?

Oh, I can do that.

True comedy...

...now listen up...

...is about talking.

Talking?

That's what I said.

Now, get ready to laugh your faces off.

So here we go.

Two nuns walk into a bar.

And then the priest said, "Bless you my child."

And the bartender said, "Yeah, that's what she said."

Get it?

So lame.

Comedy, huh?

Rika agrees popular people do have a tendency

to be rather funny.

Big Brother.

Here is your tea.

Thanks.

I wish I had been around to hear you tell your funny story.

Was it great?

No. Count your blessings.

Truth.

It was way beyond bad.

Hey!

Well.

At least I did more than just change my stupid hairstyle

like you guys did.

Hush.

No one asked you.

Oh, speaking of hairstyles,

I recently heard something pretty fascinating.

What did you hear?

I read a magazine that said this style called a "pouf"

is really popular right now.

You know, for people with actual lives.

A pouf?

Well, you literally pouf up your hair to make it all big.

And after you've got that crazy volume, you're supposed

to put random decorations and stuff in it.

Weird.

But it does kinda sound fun.

Rika's seen pictures of that all over the internet.

They almost remind Rika of medieval European nobility.

Seriously?

Sounds like it's perfect for me!

There are historically super extreme versions

of the pouf, too.

Like they'd twist their hair up into an elaborate cage and

then put a real, live bird in there and get it to flap around.

For real.

Why would they do that?

Rika supposes they wanted to emphasize individuality

over functionality,

a concept not unlike that of the Warring States helmets.

So, basically, this "pouf" style, like the helmets

of the warring state generals, was designed to serve as proof

of identity for those brave souls who were tragically

beheaded in battle.

That way, their heads would receive the respect

deemed appropriate for their position, not to mention...

That is in no way accurate.

That's a real shame.

Okay.

I mean, I don't totally get it, but I'll assume you guys do.

If you ask me, only like a really exceptional person

would have the ability to pull off this look.

A boring old commoner would look ridiculous if they even tried,

am I right?

Sorry if I'm annoying you with all this talk

of something irrelevant to your life.

Anyways, the safest bet for an ordinary commoner would be

to get an ordinary hairdo at an ordinary salon.

Still, though, one day I hope I get the chance to see

a pouf in real life.

Rika does too, but it would be difficult.

There just aren't many people out there with the naturally

aristocratic and gorgeous aura needed to carry such a look.

That class of intense self-assuredness

is so hard to come by.

Preach, sister.

What a crying shame.

They couldn't be more obvious.

I could pull off a pouf!

It worked.

I'm an aristocrat who's like overflowing with awesome aura;

no one is better suited for the pouf than me!

Don't strain yourself, Meat.

She's right, Sena; the pouf is an exceedingly tricky hairstyle,

and we don't want you to accidentally hurt yourself.

I'm not gonna get hurt!

The aura of divinity I project from within is enough

to carry off anything, much less some silly, little,

fad hairstyle.

And this is why she's such an easy target.

Okay, well, if you're up for it,

I don't mind poofing your hair for you right this minute.

Good idea.

Rika has all sorts of tools in her lab and will go get them!

Tools.

What for?

Kay.

We're both ready if you are!

I'm ready; just don't go too crazy, okay?

Quit squirming, Meat.

This is gonna be fun.

Well, I have to admit,

it's pretty nice to have another girl brush your hair for you.

Oh wow.

Rika can't believe how shiny and smooth your hair is, Sena.

Rika can't see a single split end.

Guess I can give you credit for good hair, too, if nothing else.

Thanks!

Yozora, your hair is also very pretty.

Rika's way jealous.

I guess it's not horrible,

which makes it her one redeeming characteristic.

But don't sell yourself short,

Rika, because your hair is awesome.

I told you not to move.

Is it really?

Here, a refill.

Thank you.

All right, it's poofing time.

Any requests, Meat?

Oh, I dunno.

You could try to make me

look like someone who has a real life.

A "has a life" theme, huh?

Real lives make me think of... summer?

Yeah, that's perfect.

We can give it a whole

"girl who has a real life enjoying summer" feel.

First, let's wave the sides

to evoke the image of rolling ocean waves!

Yes. I like it.

Next, why don't we try putting in sassy little ringlets

that'll represent the swirling tides!

And this part can be a summer storm,

so kind of flashy frizz!

What do you think of it, Sena?