Saikō no Rikon: Special (最高の離婚Special 2014)

Do you know the number one reason for divorce?

It's marriage. You get a divorce because you get married.

Tough. It's tough when I open my eyes in the morning.

I go sleep at night while thinking it's tough.

Our dinner last night was deep-fried horse mackerel.

When I was going to add some soy sauce, she added worcester sauce!

There are three things I'd like to say.

First, deep-fried horse mackerel only goes with soy sauce. Second, if she want to add worcester sauce,

she should have just add them for herself. Third, on top of that,

why did she have to add mayonnaise too? Can you believe it!?

Marriage is an endless torture session.

Like when you go to Hawaii and it's raining everyday there.

Like when you go to a zoo but the animals are all sleeping.

Like when you go to watch a movie, but it's Part Three already.

I think Toy Story 3 was the best one, though.

I cried watching Toy Story 3, though I didn't get to watch the first ten minutes.

Cause my wife came late... Why do you think she was late?

She said, "I fell asleep for the third time (san-do-ne)"

San-do-ne? Sound like a place name in Mexico or something.

Falling asleep for second time (ni-do-ne) is normal, but third time is not.

Como estas sandone shita?

Buenas tardes sandone shita? Eh, what's that...

Please don't move.

I'm into fortune-telling lately.

Ah, you'll break up with your wife soon.

No, no, actually we already broke up.

Since we divorced, we're living together...

...and one year has passed.

But somehow... we're thinking of getting married again.

There are things we finally understand after we divorced...

In the end, the reason to get married is divorce.

Don't you think such a couple exist?

So, when should I submit the marriage papers?

This is difficult... / Ahh, so cold.

So cold...

Ahh.... cold....

I'm so hungry.

This is not working.

Hey, I'm hungry.

I'm trying to make fire here.

You better use this!

Here. / No, no, no!

This is camping, we have to work with the nature... we don't need this.

Where's the electrical stove?

You were the one... you were the one who insisted to bring that.

Why are we going for a camp on December 30th, anyway?

It was you...

Watch out! Watch out!

Movies are better to be watched on the movie theater, curry tastes better on the second day...

Those things... those kinda things... / Okay, okay, okay.

Nothing good will come out from being picky about these things...

Here you go!

Ah, it's on, it's on!

Thank you very much.

Hamasaki-san!

I came!

What is that? Looks like a spy vehicle.

He gave me a ride when I was in trouble at the station.

Uehara-san, we have beer!

Thank you!

Here you go.

You must be feeling lonely without your wife and child around.

They'll be back from Aomori tomorrow.

I really can't wait to see my daughter!

You've totally become a father, huh.

Would you like to see?

Not this one, not this one...

Here she is! I'll zoom in!

So cute!

Seconds? Okay.

Sorry.

Hot, hot, hot!

Hamasaki-san, the woods aren't enough...

Don't touch them with your wet hands!

Yuka-san, you look like EVA eating it's kids.

So good! / Delicious!

Ah, a bug.

What now... a bug is coming in.

Uehara-san, Tokyo is raining.

We only have this kind of umbrella, though.

Thank you!

Be careful on the way. / See you again!

Yuka-san, see you again. Thank you.

Hey, they said they have all gathered!

Why must we spend New Year's eve at Fujinomiya?

I want to fly like a bird...

3.02 PM? Okay, I'm going out now.

How's Kaoru?

Asleep? So, she's asleep. Okay, okay.

I'm going now!

Uehara-kun?

Shiomi-san?

Papa is so late.

Shall we get a taxi?

Akari-san!

Sorry! / It's okay.

You must be tired. Let's go home by taxi.

What's wrong?

Oh, sorry. I must've misheard the time.

Kaoru...

Yes, sorry. Welcome home!

Don't cry. Here, here...

Kaoru, don't cry, don't cry.

Welcome home! / Ah, here... it's...

Dad, here! / Here they are!

Come here, come here! / What? Wait, what?

Yasashii dake no aitsu wo wasurete Forget about that nice guy

Hey, hey, hey!

Hageshii toki wo yume mitetai yoru That one great time, the night we were dreaming

Yay!

Tamerau dake de udauda shiteiru Hesitant and long-winded

Hey, hey, hey!

Aitsu to kurabete ore wo miteru nara Just look at me, forget that guy

Yureugoku kakehiki to hajirai no shareta yoru Shaky tactics and the embarrassing, unforgettable night

Sonna poozu nante kyou wa nakutte ii You don't have to pose like that today

Me wo tojite oide yo Close your eyes and come to me

So many things happened in 2013.

True. / Were there?

So true. / I don't really remember.

Some people divorced early in that year.

One year has passed since the divorce, huh.

You even troubled Mom because of that.

But I had fun.

Yuka-san became close with such a young boy.

Mitsuo was into idols on his 30 years of age.

They look like they've become closer than ever since they divorced.

That's true...

What are your plans from now on?

When will you stop dragging on this relationship?

Are you two going to keep dragging this?

We're going to get married.

We'll end this divorce!

Oh, my!

What are you crying for? / I'm not crying.

Ah, time for countdown!

So, what will happen next year?

You want some?

How unusual of you.

I will become a big-hearted man next year.

Oh? Can I expect a New Mitsuo? / Definitely.

Brand New Mitsuo!

Then I want you to take me to the zoo next year.

I can only go by myself to the zoo.

That's not 'brand new' at all!

Cheers!

Hold it...

Toilet...

It's time for countdown!

Here we go! 10, 9, 8, 7

6, 5, 4, / Ouch, ouch...

3, 2, 1!

Happy new year!!

Yay! Happy new year!

Ow... owww!!

Ambul... ambulance... it hurt.

SAIKOU NO RIKON

Subtitles by yanie

It's a stone. / Excuse me?

Ureteral stone.

Please take off your underwear and put them inside the basket.

Underwear!? Okay...

Oh... okay...

In the rabbit basket, please.

Happy...

New Year...

Awesome!

I know it's not a big deal,

but I'd like to hear your experience about it.

You better get ready. It's like the most painful thing in life,

will come sliding toward you from now on.

But my back teeth was once removed

without anesthesia, by mistake.

Trust me, it felt 1000 times more hurt than when I was fighting a bear.

It will change your life.

My face became like my face now because of the stone, you know.

In any case, just drink a lot of water.

Drink the water of the whole bath tub everyday.

Hey!

Heyy!

The Neighborhood Chief told you to gather in the park at 2 o'clock.

Huh? What for? Trash collection? Grass cut?

I can't do that now.

Go there for me. / I have work.

Okay, see ya! / Hey!

Ouch, ouch!

Ow!

Good morning. / Oh, hello.

I'll leave the rest to you, then.

Wait. I haven't heard anything.

I heard you have experience in baseball.

So, yeah... Please guide them.

Oh, right. Here you go.

Here's something for you. Alright then, I'm leaving it to you.

No way...

This is impossible.

I can't...

What? / Someone took over the swing!

Why don't you wait for your turn?

I was lining up just now.

When you grow up, other people will get ahead of you many times.