Ugly Betty

Papi, I am so excited about our Christmas dinner tonight.

I've been telling Matt all about

Your traditional homemade tamales

How do these look?

What is that supposed to be?

Potato latkes swimming in oil.

Apparently, grandpa wants me to be a house by new year's.

Ugh, what's that smell, papi?

Oh! That's even worse.

Since when do you make potato latkes?

Since I'm inviting someone to join us tonight,

And I think she'd appreciate it if we celebrated

Christmas and Hanukkah. Someone?

She? Hanukkah?

Well, there may be a certain Jewish lady

I'd like to get to know better.

What? After a long distance relationship,

It was nice to meet someone in the neighborhood.

And she's excited to be having dinner with a councilman.

Oh... yeah. Archie's really busy, so... I just called him. He's coming.

Oh, great. Yay!

Now Archie and Matt can finally get to know each other,

And then we can double-date.

Nope. Nope, I'm not gonna do that thing that I always do,

Which is get way ahead of myself

And start projecting into the future. Could you project into this afternoon

And have him bring drinks? Turns out,

Cooking Christmas and Hanukkah dinner is quite a schlep.

I'd help, but I have model U.N. Until 7:00. I'm Sweden.

That's great, mijo.

Come home when you can. See if you can get us a discount

On a Volvo. As Sweden, you get a lot of that.

Oh, Papi, don't worry.

I promise I will start helping you as soon as I get home.

Me, too. No breakfast?

No. Actually, I'm feeling kind of queasy today.

Oh, that's weird. Me, too. Really?

I hope we're not coming down with something.

All right, I'm off to work. Love you all.

Have a good day. Okay, bye.

Bobby! Chipmunk!

Hey, hon, you know you're gonna get over your crush on me

One day, right? You're so funny. Bye.

See ya. Have a good day.

Bobby.

Hey. What are you doing here?

I came--

No! I know exactly what you're doing here and I don't like it.

What happened between us-- That cannot happen again, okay?

I came to give Justin a ride to school, okay?

He's got a bulky project. He does not have a bulky project.

Oh, thanks so much, Bobby. Who knew that

Nobel prize winners and what they wore could be so heavy?

Hey, Mr. Suarez.

Hey, Bobby. I was just about to put up the manger.

Do you like our baby Jesus?

We've had him since someone stole our original 14 years ago.

I had nothing to do with that, I swear.

Can we go?

Jimmy Carter's cardigan just slipped off the hanger.

Let me give you a hand with that. Thank you.

It's official!

Jumpsuits are back... again!

Thank or curse

Former "Mode" evil queen Wilhelmina Slater,

Who started the trend after being spotted about town

In other news, Connor Owens,

Former "Mode" finance-wiz- turned-caged-con man

Is behind bars for stealing the Meade fortune.

Officials are searching for the missing monies.

Let's hope enough of it turns up to buy Willie a belt.

After all, Ms. Slater,

A waist is a terrible thing to waste.

What was she thinking?

I've seen actual blueberries look less round.

I think it's quite flattering.

Oh, Marc, she's gone.

You don't have to defend her anymore. Mom, leave him alone.

He's just working through a little Stockholm syndrome.

She was the Symbionese Liberation Army

To my Patty Hearst.

She even bought me a beret.

Speaking of accessories, the ascot's really working.

You think so? Trust me.

Mom, we really need to move on a new creative director.

I don't like how Hartley's dragging his heels

On that list of candidates I gave him. He's considering a few other ideas

That are a little more... "outside the box."

Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it.

My mom's letting her soulless new boyfriend call the shots.

That seems like good, solid business sense to me, hmm?

Look, Daniel.

It's Cal's money that's keeping this company alive.

And if you'll recall,

Our money is gone because of your friend.

God, I hope he rots in jail.

That traitor deserves whatever he gets.

How on earth did you manage to swing

Daily conjugal visits?

Well, having a senator as a father

Certainly has its perks.

Willie, as fun as this is,

We didn't have you turn me in for nothing.

I know you want to be back at "Mode,"

So you do your part, I'll do mine,

And we'll have you back there in no time. Well, I hope it takes longer than that.

These past three weeks have been heaven...

aside from my tailoring bill.

You have got to stop literally ripping my clothes off.

I can't afford to be caught sneaking out again

In one of your ridiculous jumpsuits.

It's a miracle I could pass it off as a trend.

You know, some idiots will wear anything.

How long do we have to keep hiding from her?

Well, until we're less obviously happy.

Hmm, that could take awhile. I know. I love our new thing--

No labels, no expectations, just living in the moment.

Oh, by the way, will you bring drinks to dinner tonight?

Something fancy. My dad's trying to impress a new lady friend.

Some guys never stop trying too hard.

You wanna see me break dance? Not now.

But no expectations.

What are you thinking about?

You're glowing.

Nothing.

I guess you make me glow.

Mrs. Meade!

You'll be landing at

The Sioux Falls regional airport at 2:35.

I'm sorry I didn't book it sooner,

But those dopes at the international terminal

Kept telling me I was calling the wrong place.

Amanda, am I doing the right thing,

Chasing after my lost son? I mean, what if

He has a terrible life because I gave him up?

What if he doesn't want to know me? What--what if he hates me?

Mrs. Meade, you're putting way too much pressure on my hand.

Look, you just have to show up and see him.

And you'll know what to do next.

Thank you, Amanda.

But not looking like that.

You're going to South Dakota. You have to blend in.

Less "money," and more "food stamp."

Come on. We're gonna give you a make-under.

I've got the silver fox on the move.

Oh, the decorations are so beautiful.

Yeah.

Hey, you okay?

Yeah. I don't know why I'm so emotional these days.

Hi, welcome to Macy's believe station.

For every letter mailed to Santa,

Macy's will donate $1-- Up to $1 million--

To the Make-A-Wish Foundation. That is so nice!

That's great. Now I'm gonna ask Santa

To make sure that one day every child is happy and healthy.

Sure. And I always ask for world peace.

And what did you ask Santa for?

Well, I can't tell you. Then I won't get it. Your wife's very superstitious.

Oh, she's not-- I'm not his wife.

Wow! January Jones for our March cover--

That's exciting!

Ugh! Enough "Sad Men." Isn't she a little played out?

I love her. I love her, too.

You know, Marc, it's okay.

You can totally disagree with Daniel and he doesn't hit you

Or psychically shame you in any way. It's confusing.

By the way, your tie is really wide.

Yeah, it's, uh...it's an ascot.

We're playing.

You realize that's, uh, kind of my bagel you're eating?

I'm sorry.

I've been feeling sick all morning, and now I'm starving.

You can have it. I'll go get my own.

Hi, honey. Hello.

Uh, Daniel, Marc, I would like you to meet

Denise Ludwig, our new creative director.

Denise, this is Daniel meade, our editor-in-chief.

Hey, it is great to meet you.

Are you ready to kick this thing in the ass?

Uh, Denise here was head of development

For White Line pictures.

This little lady is gonna bring a touch of tinseltown magic.

And you sure as hell could use it. I'm here to commercialize your message,

Just like I did for White Line.

I was the one that took them from yawn-fest indie darlings

To back-to-back blockbuster tent poles.

I get back-to-back tent poles just thinking about it.

I'm kidding. You can't sue me. Actually, you can try. I'd like to see that.

Cal, we need to talk for a minute.

Uh, why don't I show you the tanning bed?

Solid.

Okay. What are you trying to pull?

My mother and I submitted

A list of top candidates in the business.

You hire someone not even in the business

Without discussing it with us? Well, I'll discuss it with your mom

When she gets into bed tonight.

And with regard to your problems with Denise--

My money, my choice.

Please.