The Adventures of Puss in Boots

- -El Gato!

I am Puss in Boots,

and I believe one solitary truth.

When it comes to being a hero,

there is no such thing as too much helping.

Trouble lurks!

Protect me, Felina.

Ha!

- -

-En garde! -

Back, mosquito!

Leave this man alone.

Hold still.

-Ah-ha! -

Victory is mine!

I am needed elsewhere.

-What is the soup of the day? -

Hold your horses, Old Pajuna's goin' as fast as she can!

Help has arrived!

I will distribute these beverages for you.

I can't get this carrot out!

Surrender, carrot!

Ah! Help is on the way, amigos!

Puss in Boots will eat a raw eggplant.

He does not care.

Puss in the Boots!

What is wrong with you?

What?

I am helping.

Helping?

If you want to help, you can go to the market and buy some lard. Here.

Unless purchasing lard is too small a task for a hero such as yourself.

Ha! There is no such thing as a small task.

Only small heroes.

One of which I am not!

- -I go!

Hah!

Here is a coin, in exchange for which I demand your largest container of lard.

Bigger.

Much bigger!

Bigger!

Hey, did you hear about the dragon?

A dragon?

Yeah! He's ferocious!

It guards a massive hoard of golden treasure.

It has wings like this!

And teeth like that!

And breath of fire!

I heard it burned down three villages in one day.

That's 21 villages a week!

A thousand and ninety-five a year!

Whoever will save us from this dragon?

- I will! -Huh?

I will ride into the desert and slay the dragon single-handedly.

And when I do, I will claim its treasure,

making me, El Moco, the wealthiest bandido who ever--

Not so fast!

Run! Run!

El Gato.

If anyone here is going to slay a dragon, it will be me.

But unlike you, I do not slay for treasure.

I slay for justice!

Yah-ha!

Would somebody please put my lard on ice?

Thank you!

Faster, Babieca! Faster!

We have justice to deliver.

Like a mail carrier who delivers justice instead of letters.

If I do not return from this heroic mission,

tell all whom you encounter tales of my legend.

Feel free to embellish.

Dragon!

I have come to slay you!

I am Puss in... Oh.

You are the dragon?

Oh, you are not such a bad guy, are you?

You are just a big softy.

Dragon!

Time to die!

Fear not, amigo.

No harm shall come your way on my watch.

Move aside, gato.

That dragon has a date with my sword.

Well then, it must be date night in...

wherever we are,

because my sword has a date with your throat.

Oh, really?

Yes, really.

- -

- -Ha-ha!

Dragon, not now.

Let me out of here! I'll tear you apart!

Ha! No chance!

You stay there and think about what you did.

- I'm going to kill you! -

Let me out!

Hello, Babieca.

I will send someone to claim El Moco.

He has a very large bounty on his head.

Yes... Well, farewell.

And you are not as awful as everyone says.

No, no, you cannot come with me.

Nice try. But I am the master of making that face. See?

You stay.

Fine.

We want lard! We want lard! We want lard!

Can I have a salad?

I told you, we are out of lard!

Then maybe we ought to eat you!

- Did someone say lard? -

Yay!

Oh, thank heavens!

Puss in the Boots!

Look out!

He followed me home.

Can we keep him?

...and then I locked El Moco in the treasure chest.

"Let me out, I cannot breathe! It is so dark in here!"

It was classic me.

I don't understand.

You see, the treasure chest had a latch and--

No, I mean, why is that here?

Oh, yes! The dragon.

Well, I rode out with the intention of delivering justice,

but when I arrived, I was met with this old, sickly creature.

Why, just look at him.

So sad and scraggly.

I must help him.

Look at that face.

Who is a good dragon?

Who is a good dragon?

You are the one that is a good dragon.

Can we name it?

How about Dragon Toby?

That is no name for a mighty beast such as this.

We shall call him...

Now all I can think of is Dragon Toby. Dragon Toby it is.

Yay!

You cannot keep a wild dragon here!

They are dangerous!

Oh, you say that about everything.

I do not!

Yeah, you kinda do.

You said it about me, and I'm as sweet as pie.

-Back off, Hamsack! -

Back, foul beast!

Leave us be!

You all underestimate the friendship between a cat and his dragon.

There is nothing to fear!

The fates have conspired to bring Dragon Toby and I together,

and I intend to nurse him back to health.

Because that is what a hero does.

I know just what you need.

Pajuna has the most hearty and restorative leche a sick dragon could ask for!