Palm Royale

Talent. In the pageant world, who you are is defined by what you can do.

And while my competition twirled the baton,

I excelled at something more mysterious, more magical.

The time-honored art of escape.

Harry Houdini could barely get himself out of a dinner reservation

compared to me.

Très jolie.

- Is it too young? - Please. You are positively a fetus.

Grayman! Assistánce, s'il vous plaît .

Is that Evelyn Rollins?

She has frozen shoulder and can't reach her zipper.

Back in a jiff.

Shoes, shoes, shoes.

Bonjour.

- Finally. Up top. - Oh, my goodness.

In Palm Beach,

Evelyn Rollins had been copied more times than the Bible.

It was always tasteful. Never out of step.

I wanted what she had and more.

Be still my brocaded heart.

Grayman, can you please bring me the brocade?

Is that Maxine Simmons?

Don't worry. I dressed her like a baby dock whore.

I changed my mind. Let me see the Malcolm Starr.

Back in a jiff.

"Baby dock whore"?

You said young and supple.

Listen, Grayman, whatever she's wearing,

I need you to help me keep up.

- Okay, please. - Of course, of course.

- Grayman's word is gospel. - Thank you.

Mr. Starr's new maxi.

Well, look at us. We're like a couple of twins.

Our outfits are made of the same fabric.

I do love this skirt. Or do I love these pants?

Do I love the skirt or do I love these pants?

It's palazzo.

Galanos, Grayman. Get me the Galanos.

- Fabiani. - Fabiani.

Can y'all make me a Grasshopper?

Yes, it's divine. Wrap it up and bring me the Oscar.

Oscar!

I love Grasshoppers. You ever had one?

It's the crème de menthe. I love how it makes your mouth feel so cold.

Divine.

Garçon.

- Don't step in the doo. - Why not?

- Don't step in the doo, Maxine. - One in every color.

Grayman.

Who do I have to kill to wear that?

Hold your fire, dear.

I was having it built for Norma's end-of-season Beach Ball, but, alas.

How is dear Norma?

That is so sweet of you to ask.

But it's not looking good.

Douglas and I pray for a miracle twice daily.

How Catholic.

Anything for family.

Even family you haven't seen in 20 years?

We have kept up our correspondence with Norma religiously.

Of course you have.

Isn't your husband down the hall from Norma

at Destiny Vistas?

How's he finding the food?

Grayman, have my packages sent to the house.

Oh, yes, of course. Immediately.

What'd I say?

You brought up her senile salami slice of a husband.

I really stepped in the doo, didn't I?

Can I make it up to her?

Tip to the wise. Make up without sucking up.

That's a needle I can thread.

Evelyn's either your best friend or your worst enemy.

Stay on her good side.

With Norma sadly embolized, as Evelyn Rollins goes,

so too does Palm Beach.

And how will you be paying?

You take a check?

Maybe as many as a million, mostly young people,

are expected to participate in today's moratorium against Vietnam.

Well, that's the last of it. Evelyn's taste is exquisite.

You know, it's so pricey.

Otherwise you'd know I'd never.

I just don't want to embarrass myself or you.

- Hello. - Good morning.

Your aunt had a rough night.

The doctor said the embolism has traveled to her lungs.

You and your husband should be prepared.

Didn't think it'd be so fast. We were just getting to know each other.

That's the last of 'em.

I'll be back for these.

Ticktock.

Where have you been? I was worried.

I stopped by to check in on Norma.

How is the old girl?

Well, we should be preparing.

Clearly you have been.

You bought out half of Worth Avenue.

There's so many events at the club. Different outfit for each event.

But you don't have to prove yourself, Maxine Simmons.

About that proof.

What do you say we just drop the Simmons and go by Dellacorte?

- But I'm a Simmons. - You're also a Dellacorte.

Don't you just love the way it trips off your tongue?

Dellacorte. Dellacorte.

That name has got a lot of baggage, Max.

Well, you stow that Samsonite, my dashing pilot.

It's your turn.

We don't have the money yet.

Maybe we should go back to Atlanta until the time comes.

I'm not going back there.

Okay.

I've just got into the club, Douglas.

And of course I wanna stay here to look after Norma.

I've only suggested the name change to help smooth our path.

You don't want your little wife going back to tawdry old Atlanta

with a budding better future on the horizon here.

Whatever makes the missus happy.

Excuse me, Ms. Simmons!

Ms. Simmons!

I'm sorry, we're going to the airport.

I've been ringing your room. There's the matter of the bill.

- Mr. Dellacorte's got to fly! - Mrs. Simmons! Mrs. Simmons!

Bon champs , pals!

Good afternoon, Ms. Simmons.

It's Dellacorte. Mrs. Douglas Dellacorte.

Get used to saying that.

Why don't you go ahead and make me a Grasshopper?

- You remember how I like them? - Of course.

So, you're planning on staying for the season?

Suffice to say,

you should order a case of that crème de cacao.

I plan on consuming a swarm of Grasshoppers.

Aren't you getting a little bit too comfortable for a conditional member?

- Pray tell? - Well, first month's a trial,

a chance for everyone to look you over to see if you fit in.

Then you'll need two sponsors to make it official.

And no one to blackball you.

Thank you.

I'll take this by the pool.

Here you are, Dinah. Page two.

You're here too, looking so lovely.

Is that the new Shiny Sheet?

Do we get an early delivery?

Is this seat taken?

This is Franco, and this is his chair.

Mrs. Rollins.

Well, wouldn't want such a beautiful bag on the ground.

It's bad luck in some cultures.

Hey, pal, wanna share your Shiny Sheet?

You wanna make sure...

That's tough.

Just leave me be, please and thank you.

Well, if you're not gonna read it-- Do you mind?

Hello, friend.

Mary!

Are you coming tonight?

Tonight?

FibBid, my auction for fibrosis.

Yes, those poor fibs.

I understand it's like breathing underwater.

That's cystic fibrosis. This is for fibrosis of the liver.

Cirrhosis was already taken.

It says here you've raised quite a sum, Dinah.

Proud to say we grossed $200,000.

- Impressive. - Thank you.

Where are you, Mary?

Yes, where are you?

We are at 190,000 so far.

But we're going to make much more on the auction items.

You guys make it sound like it's a competition.

What a ghastly thing to say.

Do you loathe generosity, Maxine?

No, I don't loathe it. I love it. I love generosity.

I'd love to donate something to your auction, Mary.

To donate, you have to buy a table. I'm sorry, I don't make the rules.

Well, I'll buy a table. I love tables. How much can a table cost?

Ten thousand dollars because it's last minute.

Of course. Last minute.

Not a problem.

- Got my checkbook. - Good!

Always a good idea when you're at the club.

I do believe this puts you at 200,000.

If my math is correct.

- Thank you. - No, thank you for your sponsorship.

Thanks to you, I now have two beautiful backers.

Just need one more.

It would be my pleasure.

Feels good to give.

At the Palm Royale, the more you gave, the more you got.

And I'd gotten a seat by the pool,

but what good was it if no one wanted to sit with me?

Ahoy there!

What's Dougie Simmons's wife doing sitting all by her lonesome?

No, no, you sit. I'll come to you.

Well, I'm Perry Donahue.

Dinah's better half. Yeah.

I missed you at her gala.

Yes, Douglas said you guys went to prep school together.

Congratulations on your appointment.