Utopia

Life begins.

Life begins.

I can't believe your grandpa left you a whole house.

Well, I was the only grandkid.

Well, my grandpa left me his shoes.

We're not married yet.

Okay. Well, then, you're Mrs. Almost Ethan Lander.

A little elbow grease, we'll be good as new.

Well, grease we got.

Fungus and mildew and probably some killer mold.

What the hell is this?

Don't look, just dump.

"Utopia."

It's like a comic book or something.

Crap. What was your grandpa into?

Fucked up.

Fucked up. Ugh.

Really fucked up.

Ugh.

- Just throw it out. - Wait, hang on, hang on.

"Utopia, the conclusion to Dystopia."

So there's more of this shit out there.

- What are you doing? - This could be worth something.

Some guy last year found an old Batman comic in his attic.

Sold it for, like, a million bucks.

We sell this for a fraction of that,

we can pay off your student loans,

I start my podcast.

A little nest egg for a family.

Ethan.

Fanboys are gonna go nuts over this.

It's happening. It's happ...

It's happening!

Exactly. And like I said, according to CDC,

tick-borne illnesses, such as Lyme disease, have tripled...

Well, that's probably a question for your doctor, but, uh...

Yes, aches are awful.

Aching is ruthless.

Yeah.

Way to go, Ian.

One more score for the home team.

Let's go. Come on.

Once upon a time there was a little girl

named Jessica Hyde.

Jessica Hyde had a daddy who was a genius scientist.

Now, Jessica and her daddy were held

by an evil villain named Mr. Rabbit.

He made Daddy Hyde create horrible viruses,

until one day a hero named Artemis

broke out Jessica and her daddy.

Mr. Rabbit sends his henchmen, the Harvest, after them.

The Harvest kidnap Daddy,

so now Jessica Hyde has to save him.

But that's just the mythology.

Dystopia appeared in 2014, and if you're smart...

If you're really, really smart...

You can study it and decipher

all the real-life epidemics it predicted.

Yeah... Ebola, MERS,

Heartland virus, just to name a few.

See, that's why we need Utopia.

Because who knows what horrible things are coming next?

I mean, why do we keep feeling like

it's the end of the fucking world?

Because someone is ending the fucking world.

Y-You're not getting it.

Look, look. Microcephaly.

Mosquitoes. Hmm? Hmm?

Zika.

We're gonna find the next Zika!

- What? - It kind of reminds me

of what you say about God.

If the ignorant want to believe, they'll find a way.

Go pester y-your parents, doubter.

Look at that...

Just... Ah, ah, germs. Germs?

Seriously. Please, just go to your room.

Coming through.

- Vaping's still smoking, Carla. - Whatever.

Flight 592 clear direct to Muni.

Leave at your discretion.

Hey, so, uh, Fringecon's tomorrow.

Can I borrow 30 bucks?

You borrow 30 bucks for the train

so you can spend 200 bucks on a comic.

Priorities.

Got to see what that naughty bunny is up to.

Mr. Rabbit is just a metaphor, Dad.

- Come on, I've told you this. - I know.

You're too easy to tease, Wilson.

Crackpots have to have a sense of humor.

Take it from me.

Thanks. Thanks, Dad.

Don't forget to have a good time.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Okay. Okay.

Okay, okay, okay.

Shit.

You couldn't go to the climate rally

and call it your good deed?

Rallies don't work.

They make us feel better about doing nothing.

Samantha Gloria Steinem Jawalsky, that is not true.

We protest agriculture policy after half of Africa starves.

We ration water after we drain our aquifers.

We debate climate change after the world is on fire.

I want to do something ahead of time for once.

Besides, I think they'd be kind of lost without me.

I know the feeling.

Aw.

My save-the-world girl.

The fires have destroyed more than 40,000 acres

and counting, with just ten percent contained amidst...

And it's estimated that 390 billion tons

of glacier ice are melting each year,

a crisis that ultimately threatens

every coastal city in the world.

...is experiencing a flu outbreak

that has so far killed four children.

All victims were students at a local...

Here's Jessica Hyde.

She's kind of cute.

Totally cute.

Whoa. Careful with the merchandise.

Okay, who's got the vodka?

Finally.

"Wilson..."

- Wilson"? - Not a title.

Just my name.

Please sit.

Just...? Yeah.

Hey.

Hi.

You guys having a... you having a rocking time?

I just came to party, too, but I thought, you know,

I'd come in and just take a look at this crap.

Uh, just... just one page.

Uh, well... Can...?

Sure.

This is the original manuscript.

And how did you guys get a hold of it?

Through a collector.

Where'd the collector get it?

From the artist.

Really? Who's the artist?

- You know, we're on a schedule, so... - Oh.

Just write down, uh, your contact info, your bid

and your room number right next to your name.

You got, um, you have a lot of interest?

It's like a pilgrimage for some.

You're late.

This car? I love her.

But she's trouble.

'74 MG, four-cylinder.

You're very late.

And sometimes, she glitches.

She'll get us there in style, though.

I wanted to get there on time.

The only thing slowing us down now

is you standing in the road, not getting in the car.

Okay. You ready?

Yeah. Let's do it.

- Please come in. - Oh. Watch your...

Please, come in.

Hey. How's it going?

Hi.

- Hi. Nice to meet you. - Thank you.

Wow.

Uh-huh.

Have a seat.

- Come in. Sit down, just, right there. - Okay.

Actually, uh... Please.

Where do I sign?

I got a couple websites, a couple .orgs, a couple .nets,

- if you want to join the list. - Yeah. - Sure.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Oh, watch your head.

Thank you.

Great. Thank you.

Bye, ladies.

Bye.

- Hi. - Hi.

Wow.

Good old Artemis.

Uh, I was actually wondering if there's anything