SurrealEstate

Look out!

-There’s no way this ends with you staying in this apartment.

-This was supposed to be my forever home.

-Zooey, this is, ah, Rochelle.

The power -- it’s all back?

-It was my mom. I touched her hand

and it was like plugging into a 12-gauge speaker wire.

You don’t need them anymore, Susan.

Susan!

-Let’s storm the castle. And get our girl back.

Gang’s all here!

Your office?

-Do you want to get that? -Oh! No, it’s okay.

-As I was saying, after this time off,

I am just a totally different person.

I’m picking up on that.

-I read a little, traveled a little

and just hung out.

Can you picture me just hanging out?

-I’m trying. -And now I’m back!

Ready to strap right back into that co-pilot seat

and play that second fiddle like Jascha Heifetz!

We hired a new agent.

Her name’s Lomax and she’s excellent.

-Can’t wait to work with her.

That is, if I’m still welcome.

Susan, you are family.

It’s just, this is really all of a sudden

and I just want to make sure--

Excuse me. Can we help you?

Yeah.

I could tell you were getting to the part where you wipe

Susan’s tears off her shoes with your perfect hair

and I just had a quick question first.

Bitch, what the actual hell?

Where were you when I was getting

squeezed out of your house like a festering zit

on prom night, huh?

-You were in my house? You just walked in?

-No! I jimmied the back door and then I walked in.

Your house kicked the shit out of me and then spit me out!

-I have no idea what you’re talking about.

-It happened. We saw her.

I told you I was traveling.

It must have happened when I was gone. Weird!

I saw you in the mirror...

and I know you saw me.

-Let’s figure this out tomorrow. But I’ll be honest:

You got a lot of fences to mend around here.

That’s what I do.

I’m a people person!

-I don’t believe it. -It’s true!

-A linear accelerator capable of creating electron beams

up to 35 mega-electron volts

that weighs less than 75 kilograms?

-It’s less than half a meter in diameter!

-Unbelievable. -Mm.

A doctor can throw it in his back seat,

drive to a rural hospital and deliver

precise radiation treatments.

Hm.

-This stuff is being developed by people

not half as brilliant as you.

But they have support, they have resources.

-Shell, I’ve been out of the game too long.

It would take me ages to catch up.

-All the more reason to start now.

Mmm...

-August, you can’t be happy duct taping a VCR to a...

a blender so you can frappé some evil spirit

and calling it science.

Come back to ASDRA, Augie.

Promise me you’ll at least consider it?

Lomax, right?

I’m Susan. Ireland.

It’s-it-it’s nice to meet you.

I saw you the other night.

No one introduced us

which I thought was rude.

-I-I suppose you want your office back?

-No rush. I won’t be around much.

I have appointments today.

New listings. Prospects. Possibilities.

A real estate agent who hangs around the office

has no reason to live.

-Darkest motivational poster ever.

-Phil! -Welcome back.

-I am literally dying for that boundary confirmation

on the Matthews place.

-Matthews? Matthews, it’s a... That’s a normie.

I have a couple things here that can’t wait.

-What makes you think I’ll wait?

I’m driving there this afternoon. You can come along.

-No, no, I can’t. Felicity has a doc appointment.

-Sounds like a "you" problem.

No, if it was a "me" problem

we’d have something to talk about.

This is a "her" problem and those aren’t negotiable.

Look, I’ll do the research tonight

and I can do the site visit later.

Fine.

Hey, Dad.

Sorry I didn’t get here sooner.

The, uh...

I know they’re gonna be opening any minute, uh...

Luke!

I am your father.

I always wanted to do that.

How are you, Dad?

-Still dead. Otherwise I’m good.

I, uh, geez! Let’s see.

Uh, when last we left off

I thought I’d found mom, but really it was-

-Doesn’t matter. It’s all in the past.

What matters now is the future.

-I talked to mom. -I know.

The real one, I...

We didn’t, like,

run into each other’s arms or anything, but I think

we started towards... I don’t know.

An understanding?

That’s good, Luke.

You needed that.

-But, hey, got my fastball back.

We could pick up where we left off and--

-Yeah. Things have changed.

You were my unfinished business.

I raised you alone, making it up as I went along.

And I think I did a fairly good job.

But, I didn’t want to leave you behind

with you blaming yourself for family things

that were not your fault.

Now you need to move on in your life.

And I need to see what’s next.

No.

I still need you, Dad.

-You know it’s not natural for me to be here.

Take away my rugged good looks,

I’m just like one of those things you find

in your clients’ attic.

Now, you know better than anybody

what I need to do.

Absolutely not.

-Luke! The last thing I want--

Just a second!

If they could open any--

minute.

Megan. Hi!

It’s Luke... Roman.

Uh, I saw you called.

Try me back. I’ll try you back.

We’ll try each other... back.

[approaching footsteps

I’m going to the Hennessy closing.

Have fun.

-You haven’t talked any more to Susan, have you?

I know. She’s been a little--

Heinous?

Off.

Zooey, she had a moment where she wondered

if her life was really going the way she wanted it to.

It happens to people,

like you and the whole agent thing.

And the law school thing.

Law school takes, like, three years.

And that’s if I went full time.

-It’s what it takes. -And what if I hate it?

-Zooey... -It only took me a few weeks

to learn real estate. And then a few more days

to realize that I would rather exfoliate with drain cleaner

than do it every day for the rest of my life.

So, you’re just giving up?

-Technically, I never started, so...

What?

Nothing.

Just play nice with Susan, okay?

-Not going to toss her out the door or anything.

’Cause that would be wrong.

Welcome back.

Augie! Thank you!

I got your, uh, email

regarding the Gunderson homesite.

We don’t generally do PKTs on raw land.

-Marvin Gunderson is very superstitious.

He wants to make sure the dirt is clean

before he builds. How ’bout Thursday afternoon?

-I’m evaluating a new Lomax listing at three.

Could we make it five?

-I don’t work past five anymore.

It’s part of my new work-life balance.

How ’bout tomorrow? It’s a beautiful place,

up on a cliff, amazing views.

Gives you chills.

Tomorrow it is.

-Zooey, I need you to clear my calendar

after five and on weekends. I’m taking time for us.

Who’s us?

Me, myself and I.

Drop that off at the dry cleaners. No starch.

What?