Ugly Betty

In 1907, a professional swimmer named Anethe Kellerman

dared to wear a fitted one-piece swimsuit

On a beach in Boston,

Instead of the cumbersome dress and pantaloon combination

That was popular for women at the time.

She was arrested for indecency.

As someone who has always been known

To make daring fashion choices,I see a lot of myself in her.

So what Ms. Kellerman designed was

the precursor to all modern swimsuits.

So not only would she be a fascinating feature subject,

But we could do a whole accompanying photo spread--

A hundred years of swimwear.

And...

I got the suit.

Unitards don't really scream sexy.

More like,um...

1970s magician.

That's the first smart thing you've said

Since half the staff had to rescue you from a cult.

Snap!

I'm sorry. We'll be keeping that a secret.

Betty,write the feature. No photos,please.

And since we are on the subject of the swimsuit spread,

Everyone knows we're shooting in the Bahamas.

That is essential employees only.

Matt Hartley will be drawing up the list.

So stop sending me tacky flowers,

And do your sucking up to him.

I am fine with tacky flowers.

Or,uh,better yet,cupcakes.

Basically,I can be bought.

That's all.

This will be my last shoot at "Mode".

I've told you many times before

That people will die at my hands if things are not perfect.

And this time,I ain't playin'.

She ain't playin'!

Oh,that was fun.

Scaring the minions for sport one last time.

It's not for sport, Marc. I'm serious.

Oh,okay.

I thought you just might want to take it easy in the Bahamas,

What,with the Connor and Nico fallout.

Fallout? My daughter betrayed me,the love of my life died.

All things considered,a bad day.

Oh,I'm sorry, Willie. If you want to talk about it--

Do I look like a girl?

Now is not the time to take things easy.

You're only as good as your last shoot.

The magazine business is shrinking.

And I am not cheap.

Ugh,one of the only "C" words in the english language

Never used to describe you.

The other's "cuddly".

Well,fortunately,the Editor-in-Chief Of "Isabella"

is stepping down due to life-threatening health issues.

And I have it on good authority

That the job is between me and Penelope Graybridge.

Penelope Graybridge? Oh,I've heard of her.

She's beautiful and unstoppable.

And she's a junkie.

well,try to get her picture on

one of those "I lost me to meth" billboards.

This job is my only option.

I didn't really mean it when I told people to bribe me.

Didn't you,a little bit?

Well,maybe a little bit.

But with one spot left,I thought I'd get some better stuff.

This is just stolen office supplies.

Hey,that's my stapler.

Not anymore.

I'll trade you.

Oh,my god. You,too?

It's not a bribe.

I mean,yes,I would love to go to the Bahamas.

But I'm not essential to the shoot.

This is just a thank-you gift

For helping me get Daniel out of the cult.

You're a good friend.

So we're really friends?

Yeah. I think we're friends. Don't you?

Yeah,definitely. Friends. Great.

I've gotta get back to work. Thanks for the pail.

Yeah. Thanks for the stapler.

Bus driver... Move that bus!

Justin, you gotta come in here.

They just gave these people their new house,

And there's,like,18 people shaking uncontrollably.

Hey, Bobby. What are you doing here?

I just came to get some water,you know?

Oh,no,no,not this show, Hilda.

This makes me cry like a baby. Turn it off.

You know,chicks kinda dig it when you cry,right?

Hey,don't call girls chicks. You hear me?

All right. I'm gonna go do my homework.

So why did you drive Justin home?

Ah,high school can be rough,you know?

I just want to make sure nobody bothers the kid.

Not on my watch.

See?

Try to act all tough guy,

But I've always known there's a big softy under there.

Ooh. Bicep. It's not so soft.

All right. I got my water. I'm gonna go.

Okay.

Okay.

Come back if you get...

Thirsty again.

You're a good friend. Betty

I left something out of your gift.

It's all of your favorite colors.

Wait. Where's Betty's stapler?

Okay,you can use that bikini but not that model.

You know what? You came in at the perfect time.

I'm just finishing my list for the Bahamas,

And I've got one spot left.

- How'd you like to go? - But--

You can be an associate stylist for the shoot.

Oh,my god. Oh,my god. A promotion! Thank you.

Okay,but... I have to ask you,is this just a work thing?

'cause you're kinda big on the mixed signals.

I know. I'm sorry.

Look,I have a great time when we're together.

But sometimes it's hard to think about you and me

When other people are around.

So it might be nice to get together away from other people.

I totally agree.

We're talking about Betty,right?

Bahamas Personnel

Amanda Tanen Associate Stylist

Amanda? Amanda?! Amanda?

Amanda's going to the Bahamas?

I wonder what she's gonna do there.

I guess she could not answer the phones at Atlantis

As well as she doesn't answer them here.

Did you not notice how I hunched my shoulders

And averted my gaze upward when you approached?

Learn how to recognize social cues.

Just getting coffee.

Co-worker coffee, Not "I want to sleep with you" coffee.

Subtle.

Okay. That was weird.

Is something going on between them?

Here's another social cue.

That means,"I'm not going to talk to you".

Marc,you know something.

And you might as well just tell me,

Or I'll just chase you out of the elevator and through the streets.

Okay,fine. But only because you have sturdy legs and I'm in heels today.

I will tell you one thing and one thing only.

Amanda has wanted to tap Matt for a while now.

And they went on a date recently.

And they're probably gonna hook up in the Bahamas.

Hey,look at that. I told you everything.

Ugly Betty S04E08. Major Edited by Jazli.

Yeah, Amanda and I were a roommates.

It is a girl code that you can go after your ex-roommate / ex-boyfriend.

She's not a hell since you left.

So that it's obvious that he kept me off the list,

Because he didn't want to feel guilty about sleeping with her.

Yo. Language.

I've heard the word "sleep" before.

I thought you were over Matt.

- I am over Matt. - She's not over him.

Well,you know,if I was you,

I would get myself to the Bahamas,

Grab a fistful of that skank's hair and take back my man.

I don't want to go to the Bahamas.

That way,I don't have to have their relationship shoved in my face.

I wish me and Archie could go to the Bahamas.

A little island vacation--

That is exactly what we could use to...

Get the juices flowin'.

Okay,that I don't need to hear.

I can get you the "Mode" rate if you want. You'd love it.

They're putting everyone up at the Cove Atlantis.

Oh,my god. You have to go.

- Shakira's gonna be there this week. - I love her.

She goes under the name Sidney Lumpkin,

And I need you to get this signed for me.

- "My life with Shakira". - Yeah.

Is that cute?

You got married!

My photoshopped life is so much better than my real one.

So cute.

I'm not going to the Bahamas.

Is it just my imagination Or is everyone around me

pointing and whispering?

Oh,don't worry. They'll stop once it grows back out.

I was talking about the cult,but thanks.

- Now I know how you feel about my haircut. - Sorry.

I should probably just lay low until this whole thing blows over.

Oh,come on, Daniel. Who cares?

You're about to go to the Bahamas.

Given everything you've just been through,

I think you should do the exact opposite.

Get out there. Try and be your old self again.

But wait. You used to be pretty judgmental of my old self.

Wait. In fact,you're the one who coined the term "man slut".