South Park

- # I'm goin' down to South Park #

# Gonna have myself a time #

# Friendly faces everywhere #

# Humble folks without temptation #

- # I'm goin' down to South Park #

# Gonna leave my woes behind #

- # Ample parking day or night, people spouting howdy neighbor #

- # Headin' on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind #

- # Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine #

- # We're goin' to the water park #

# The water park, the water park #

# We're going to the water park #

# Me and all my best friends #

# Except for Kyle, who I don't like #

- Okay, Cartman, you can stop singing now.

- This is gonna be so awesome, dude.

I haven't been to the water park in like over a year!

- What do you guys wanna do first?

I hear they have a new inner tube slide.

- No, dude, we gotta go to the wave pool first!

It's so dope.

As long as there aren't any minorities.

- What are you talking about, Eric?

- You know, there's always like five or six

minorities wearing their t-shirts in the wave pool.

Pisses me off.

- We're here! It's the water park!

- I'm gonna pick you boys up right here

at 4:00, you got it?

- Come on, let's go! - We got it, dad.

- Six adorable children, please!

Wave pool! Wave pool!

Wave pool!

Oh, what the hell?

All right.

What do you guys wanna ride first?

- well, Cartman said he wanted to do the wave pool first,

right, Cartman?

- Forget it. Just forget it!

Dude, this is awesome!

You guys wanna see

how long I can hold my breath under water?

- Hey, fellas! Fellas, hang on.

I gotta go to the bathroom.

- Okay. go ahead. - Okay. Thanks!

- I can seriously hold my breath longer than anybody.

Somebody time me, all right?

- Okay. - All right, check it out--

Butters--Butters! What the fuck?

Are you peeing in the pool?

You said go ahead!

- Come on, Kyle. Let's check out the fireboats.

- No, dude. Butters' pee is in there!

- Aw, come on. Look at all this water.

It doesn't matter if one person pees in it.

Yeah, come on, Kyle.

I am not the only person here who's peed in the pool.

Lots a people do.

- No, they don't. - Yeah, they do, Kyle.

To be perfectly frank,

I peed in the pool about 25 seconds ago.

Dude!

- Come on, show us how long you can hold your breath!

No!

- # What has happened to this place? #

# I don't recognize it anymore #

# It used to be so fun and special #

# What is life worth living for? #

# The dream is dead, our land is gone #

# There's a hole in my heart and I can't go on #

# There are too many minorities #

# Minorities #

# At my water park #

# My water park #

# This was our land, our dream #

# Our dream #

# And they've taken it all away #

# They just keep coming and coming #

# Minorities #

# I tried to go and tell the police #

# But even the authorities #

# Are minorities #

# At my water park #

# There's no place for me to sit anymore #

# And the lines just keep getting crazier #

# There are Mexicans all around me #

# The lazy river has never been lazier #

# It's a 40-minute wait to go down one slide #

# And the instructions are in Spanish #

# On the zipline ride #

- guarde sus brazos y piernas dentro del paseo--

Just do it in English!

# There are too many minorities #

# Too many #

# At my water park #

# Somebody do something #

# Where did they all come from? #

# Why can't they leave this land alone? #

# And it's such a tragedy #

# Feel a bit like dying #

# We've looked the other way too long #

# We've got to change our priorities #

# And get all these minorities #

# Out of my water park #

# Minorities #

# Mexicans and Asians #

# Black people #

# I think I even saw Native American #

# Gross #

# God, I'm asking please #

# Get all of these minorities #

# Out of my water park #

# My water park #

- After this, you guys wanna hit the hurricane slides?

You bet.

- I'm not getting back in the water.

Oh, come on, Kyle.

- Dude, I just found out that everybody pees in pools.

Why would I go back?

Not everybody pees in pools.

Do you pee in the pool?

Not today--yet.

Aw, come on!

- Well dude, what are you gonna do?

Just hang out here at the table all day?

- Most likely. - You guys!

You guys, we have got problems of biblical proportions!

- Dude, where have you been? - I've been counting.

Do you know there 205 Mexicans here?

And there are 190 black people.

So what?

So...

Guess how many white people are at the water park today?

143.

There are actually more minorities here than us.

- Well, then they're not minorities, are they?

What do you mean?

- Dumb ass, if there's 60% of them to 40% of us,

then who's the minority?

The black and brown people.

No, you're the minority!

- Do I look like a minority to you, stupid?

Now look, guys, I did some calculations.

Just last year there were almost 90% normal people

to minorities.

That's a 50% rise in one year.

- This is more math than I've ever seen you do.

Because it's important!

A 50% rise each year means that in three years

the world will be only minorities.

That's 2012. The Mayans predicted this!

- The who?! - The Mayans.

They knew that minorities would take over the world

by the year 2012.

And now it's happening!

- I'm gonna go on the slides.

- Whoopee! - You guys?

You guys, we have to do something to stop this!

Come on!

Well, looks like at least you've got some sense

left in you, Kyle.

So what are we going to do to keep the Mayans prediction

from coming true, buddy?

- Blow it out your ass, Cartman.

- Eugene! That is disgusting!

Did you just pee in the pool?

- Oh, come on! Look how big this pool is.

One person peeing in it isn't going to hurt anything.

Eww!

Oh, my god!

Ah, gentlemen!

I am with the Pi Pi.

How can I a help you?

- Pi Pi, we have some dire news

concerning your water park.

- I've just finished some tests.

The water in your park is now 98% pee.

- Yes, so what's the problem?

- Pi Pi, you know that acceptable pee levels

in any water park is 83%.

You have to shut down.

- What? I can't-a close down now.

It's my biggest-a weekend!

Everyone is having the fun!

- You're endangering peoples' lives.

If those pee levels hit 100%,

there's no telling what'll happen!

- And what proof do you have

that the pee levels will go up?

- One in three people admit they pee in pools.

Add another for people who do but don't admit it,

that's two in three.

You've got just over 500 people out there.

That's 332 people about to pee in your water!

- Gentlemen, please. I come from the Venice.

Venice is almost all pee,

and we do just fine.

We swim-a in the pee, we sing-a in the pee.

You can't-a barge in here and tell me

that I have to close down