Neon Joe, Werewolf Hunter

Previously on "Neon Joe, Werewolf He-Yump"...

My name is Neon Joe.

I dedicate my whole life to hunting werewolf in the hope

that one of these time it turn out to be my daddy.

Hello, son. You know what these are?

The severed heads of all the werewolf I kill!

This here right here gonna go right here.

You chew the math.

Aah!

So what are you gonna do now?

Suppose it's time

to start following my dreams.

As for hunting werewolf, I'm officially retired.

Hey, Joe, looks like

the margarita volcano needs a new batch.

Oh, yeah? He-yump.

I made one this morning.

Added a little extra 'rita.

Gonna call it the more-garita.

- Get it? - No, I tell you what to do.

Moon is alive.

Yeah, we hear you. Moon is alive.

Okay, Uri, it's closing time.

She doesn't understand.

You don't understand.

Mm-hmm. The moon is alive.

We got it. Closing time.

Good night, Uri.

Man, oh, man, that one drunk Russki, huh, Cleve?

It's last call, ma'am.

That's, uh, Neon Joe, Werewolf Hunter, right?

Yeah, but he doesn't really go by that name anymore.

That's who he is now.

Neon Joe, regular everyday duck hunter.

Start off as more of a gimmick

to draw customers, but it didn't really work,

and so that's when we thought of the margarita volcano,

but that didn't really work, either.

So we're looking for a new gimmick.

So you're his sidekick.

Yeah, I guess I am his sidekick.

That's hot.

I'm into number twos,

if you know what I mean.

Can I get a selfie? No.

Joe doesn't like selfies.

No.

With you.

Oh, okay.

Hey.

Hmm. Thanks.

See you around. Okay.

See you later.

Number twos?

Hey, Joe.

That girl was so into you

that she wanted to take a selfie with me.

No, I think it sounded like she into you, Cleve.

What? No.

The only reason she would ever date me is

so she could have an affair with you.

Look, I'm gonna go tally receipt.

Why don't you clean up? You got it, boss.

Hey, Joe, do you ever think of me as your sidekick?

What?

Nothing.

What are you, moon?

Huh? Huh?

Coming!

I see moon.

I love moon.

Oh.

Oh, babe.

How did we do tonight, Joe?

Yeah, not very good, Cleve.

Somebody tipped with a half-eaten sandwich.

Ooh!

Bar ain't doing too good, Cleve.

All my tropical dreams

is slowly turning to tropical dust.

You mean sand?

Need new gimmick.

And don't be bringing up that wet t-shirt contest again.

I told you I ain't comfortable showing my nips.

Joe, you think maybe if you told people

you were the world famous werewolf hunter...

That ain't my life no more.

Well, that girl Ashley recognized you.

I bet there's a lot of people

that would love buying drinks

from a world famous werewolf hunter.

Do that again.

Do what again? That...

That... That little, teeny, tiny drink you just did.

Do... Do it again.

Yeah, that's it!

Sips!

We gonna start charging people by the sip!

That's our new gimmick!

Listen to this. Oahu Joe's...

Just one sip, it worth the trip.

Or loose lips drink sips.

Oh, that pretty good! Now we're talking.

Oh, you know what, though, man?

I can't really afford that right now.

Listen.

You're Neon Joe,

and you can do anything.

As they say, where there's a will, there's a...

He-yump!

Let's do this!

Let's give people the sip they never knew they needed.

All right.

He-yump. He-yump, he-yump, ah!

He-yump!

Can I get four more sips?

Coming up.

Cleve! Come on! Do a naval sip! Come on!

No.

Where you been, moon? I've been looking.

Oh, baby.

Yeah, I told you those were gonna be for, Cleve, right?

Teeny tiny sip cup. People go crazy for that stuff.

People weren't even ordering drinks sometimes

'cause they were just watching you, Joe.

Yeah, a little bit of he-yump, a little bit of he-yump,

got the he-yump on the he-yump, and a little bit of he-yump.

All right, we got 10 plus 5.

Carry the he-yump, and we got a he-yump.

What is it, Joe? How much did we make?

Uh...

A little under $15.

Guess Joe got to show his nips after all.

I'm sorry, Joe. I'm the one who gave you this idea

when you saw me sipping the beer.

You know what? Let's cheer ourselves up with some gossip.

"Tip of the Buzz"

"Tip of the Buzz."

How's this for a load of buzz?

Sources say Hollywood is ready to take

a bite out of famed werewolf hunter

and international playboy Plaid Jeff

by bringing his life story to the big screen.

And it was confirmed today

that he will be played by Kids' Choice Award nominated

actor Jason Sudeikis.

I'm really, really excited about this role.

It's got everything. You got werewolves,

you got guns, you got cool clothes.

It should be a hell of a good time.

I mean, and this guy's a trip.

You camera guys, you better watch yourself,

'cause Jason just asked me

if I'd be willing to do part-time work

as a paparazzi hunter. Uh-oh!

The film will be financed by Elon Musk-type

billionaire inventor Vance Dontay.

What the hell was that?

Oh, uh, hey, guys, sorry,

but the bar is closed.

Come back tomorrow around noon for a sip on me.

Tomorrow at noon?

We just got into town.

We're ready to drink.

How you been, Neon Joe?

Looks like retirement's...

done you pretty good.

I'm sorry, but, uh...

the bar is closed.

Oh!

That's no way to treat your former rival

and new number-one hot-shot werewolf hunter.

Yeah, I'm glad to hear things working out for you okay,

Plaid Je-yump.

It's Plaid Jeff.

And I'm doing more than okay.

I just had my 100th kill.

I suppose you didn't see the tweet tonight.

Taye Diggs retweeted me.

That's why we're here, Joe.

We're here to celebrate my 100th kill.

Yeah, I tell you something, Je-hump,

you like an Olympic sprinter.

I mean, yeah, sure, you... you fast,

but the only reason you got any gold

is due to the retirement

of the real fastest guy.

Usain He-yump.

Ooh!

Hey, Plaid Jeff, do you need some ointment?

Because you just got b-b-b-b-b-burned!

Ssst!

This is Vance Dontay.

He's my Elon Musk-type associate.

I think he can make keeping your bar open worth your while.

How does $500 sound

to keep the bar open for the night?

How do 500 "no thank you he-yump" sound?

How about $200,000 to keep it open permanently?

I mean, this place is worth, what?