Skins

Sid!

Yeah, sorry. It's just there was a...

Now, this is exactly what I'm talking about, Sid.

Ok? Lack of concentration, inability to focus, nada commitment.

Now, this piece of coursework I have marked "ungraded".

Ungraded? What?

I can't pass him with this mark.

Fucking hell!

- Mark... - Mark, please. With this mark...

Not you, Mark, this mark.

You have failed the entire year.

He's what?

He's failed the entire year.

Sod, you... sidding... idiot!

Ah, hold on, there's no need to panic. Because I fought for you, Sid, I really did,

and got you an extension.

It was hard, but I worked at it, and I got it.

- Right? - Got what right?

No, I got it. Right?

Thanks... Tom.

So... 2,000 words on Lech Walesa, Solidarity and the collapse of Soviet power.

Jesus Christ!

You've got two days. Get your head down.

You better fucking believe he's getting his head down.

You can say goodbye to sunshine, Sunshine. You are grounded.

Put it this way. Let's change and develop. Ok?

Thanks, Tom. We're all very grateful for this second chance. Aren't we, Mark?

Yes. Thank you very much.

Oh, yes, my boy! We're going to do this my way now!

You hear me? The gravy train has terminated!

Terminated! You lazy little fucker.

- Mark! - Did Tony fail this?

No.

No, of course not! And why? Why didn't he fail it?

He doesn't do history.

Right!

You are going to get something... something right,

if it's the last thing I ever do. What's your next class?

- Drama... - Right. Drama. Home. Coursework.

Fucking perfection! Or else.

Why are you talking in very short sentences?

Emphasis! Drama! Fuck off!

Honestly, Sid, you know this upsets people.

Sorry.

Just... give it a try, ok?

Ok.

Ok, everyone. Everyone reach.

Oh, Christ...

Reach up. Stretch out your leaves.

That looks so crap, doesn't it?

Go on.

Fuck that.

Why don't you go to the green and get stoned instead?

No. No, you mustn't.

That would be bad. Bad, do you hear?

And you're a good boy really. Good. Drama. Fuck it... be bad!

Be good. Drama!

- Fuck it! - Drama...

Shut up... will you?

- Pretty nice gear, huh? - Yeah, very funny.

- Where you going? - I gotta go to this lesson.

Fuck it, man.

- Fuck it? - Fuck it.

Yeah, let's go.

Right, Donny, you fart once more and you're out.

Sid?

Hi. Wow, Maxxie, you look all horny.

You can tell?

Sid... I just wanted to remind you of our date tonight.

Oh... Shit.

Thing is, Cass, my dad kinda grounded me.

I gotta do coursework.

Oh, wow.

I was really...

I didn't eat for three days so I could be lovely.

Er, sorry.

Maybe I'll come over and say hello.

I dunno. Maybe.

Safe.

Wow.

Go on, give her one.

That would be so bad!

I bet she bangs like a ferret on acid!

- Hey. - Hey.

I didn't know which one to get. They were both so pretty.

Anyway, I got them both.

What do you think? Which skirt? This goes with my slutty green top.

This one is more virgin.

Yeah?

Tony? Which skirt?

Hmm?

Oh, yeah, it's nice.

Are you listening? I'm asking what to wear to Tribe Of Frog tomorrow?

Did you ask Chris about pills?

We can have Mitsubishis.

Is that OK, Tone?

Tone?

Wear that one to Tribe Of Frog, and that one to my choir concert.

- Choir concert? When? - Tonight.

You and Sid are coming to hear me sing.

Are we? How come?

It just occurred to me how much fun it could be.

Russia... was... a... superpower...

and...

Er... Lech Walesa...

was a...

Polish... Er...

man... who...

What the fuck did he do? Erm...

Bollocks.

Fuck it.

Right, you have been warned!

Oh, yes, I warned you! This is what happens.

No telly.

No stereo.

No... Asian Fanny Fun.

That should be enough to help you concentrate. Is it?!

- Yes, Dad. - Yes. Thank you.

You'll thank me for this one day.

Oh! Oh, fuck!

What's happened?

I've fallen down the fucking stairs, you silly cow!

Bugger.

Ah, for fuck's sake.

Ah, yeah. That's better.

Oh, yeah. Ah, yeah.

I'm just gonna go out and come back in again. Ok?

Would you?

- Hello. - It's Tony!

Yeah, er, come in!

All right, Sid? Thought you might need a hand.

With your coursework. Shall we let some air in here?

Yeah.

That's better. Is that a picture of my girlfriend?

Wondered where that went.

Right then.

Russia... Lech Walesa...

Jesus, Sid.

The USSR model could be described as a relationship

of control and manipulation, but events in the G...

Gdansk.

shipyard in the autumn of 1980 was the beginning of a...

That's some really good bullshit.

Not a problem. Ok, let's go.

Where to?

My choir concert.

Don't tell me you forgot.

I can't. I'm grounded.

Don't be such a fucking vagina. This is gonna be special.

Anyway, I need someone to keep Michelle company.

Michelle's coming?

Oh, yes. Nips'll be there.

And you'll wanna see this. Trust me.

Sorry about that. You won't tell her, will you?

She thinks the world of you, Sid. Really.

And things run their course. You get bored.

Are you gonna tell me what you're talking about?

You'd better be doing some fucking work. Hi, Tony. How's things?

Not bad, Mark. Is that landfill survey finished? I'd really love to see it sometime.

Yeah, no problem. Yeah.

Actually, it's quite an interesting analysis of decomposition rates.

But look, actually, er, Sid's got some work to do now, so...

Ok. Hope to see you very soon, Sid.

Nice to see you, Mark.

- Bye, Liz! - Bye, Tony!

What?

Why could you not be like...

Why did I?

Ow!

* I got a date with the night

* Pullin' out my finger

* Gonna catch the kids dry

* Gonna walk on water

* Buying out the fight

* We're sweatin' in the winter

* Both thighs squeeze tight

* Both thighs squeeze tight

Ohl

'Mega Dog to the rescue! Attack, attack! Woof-woof! '

I'm not being aggressive...

Yes, you are.

You're the aggressive one.

Look at you, the Virgin Mary with your fucking little looks and sneers.

But that's you. Never saying anything.

Leaving it to me to deal with Captain fucking Calamity up there.

Never backing me up.

That's not true.

The boy's useless, completely fucking useless.

I sometimes wonder if he's even mine.

Oh, he's yours all right, Mark.

'Mega Dog's trying to tell us something!

'Woof, woof, woof! Woof, woof! '

Hi, Sid. We're just talking.

Right. Talking, yeah.

Get on with your coursework. We need to do some more... talking.

You see what you've done now?

- What I've done? - Yes, what you've done.

You stupid, stupid man.

What do you mean, stupid? Don't call me stupid.

I am not a stupid man. If you would listen for a second to what's...