Teen Titans

Long ago on a small, blue planet called Earth

there was a young alien girl who lived in a T.

She had many friends.

She was very powerful and very brave.

And although she never thought much of it,

she was also very beautiful.

Her life seemed entirely perfect,

until one day...

Huh?

Oh!

Starfire, hurry up!

You've been in there for 20 minutes!

And I'm not paper-trained.

One moment more, please!

No, no...

No...

I fear something may be terribly wrong with me.

I could have Erenian measles,

or perhaps my epidermis has become infested

with Steiner mites, or...

Okay. What are you talking about?

I caution.

What you are about to see

may shock and disturb you.

It's a zit. Everybody gets them. Deal with it.

Then I am normal?

Oh, thank you, Raven!

Now I shall no longer feel worried or ashamed or...

Just so you know, that's not really dealing with it.

But one little bump

was only the beginning of her worries.

Deep down inside,

something strange was happening,

something very strange indeed.

The next day, she grew tusks on her neck.

Ah...

The day after that,

her fingernails grew long and ugly.

And the day after that,

she developed bizarre cravings

for the most unusual foods.

Help me.

And with each passing day,

the strange little alien

grew stranger and stranger

and stranger still.

Oh, my friends must not see

how hideous I have become,

or they will surely think I am turning

into some sort of horrible monster.

I must never allow

anyone to see me, ever again.

Starfire, trouble!

We need to go!

Please proceed! I will join you shortly.

Is that a sewer pipe?

Ew!

I don't know what's more disgusting, Plasmus,

the way you look or the stuff you eat.

Titans, go!

Come on, boogerman, give me what you got!

I'm gonna be smelling that for a week!

Azarath Metrion...

Yuck.

Cyborg, time for the Beast Boy blitz!

Orange-flavored bad guy?

Gross, yet strangely refreshing.

- Booyah! - Awesome!

Way to go Star... fire?

Interesting fashion statement.

Yeah. Uh, nice slicker.

Starfire, you've been acting kind of strange lately.

Is everything okay?

Ew!

Just when you thought he couldn't get uglier.

Dude, that is sick.

And not in the good way.

No matter how nasty he gets, he's just a monster,

and like every other monster, he's got to go!

Oh.

Duck!

Whoa!

Starfire?

Ew!

Starfire, what's going--?

I am sorry. I have got to go.

Starfire! Wait!

I truly am a monster.

And so the sad, strange girl

flew far away

into the cold, dark loneliness of outer space.

"Surely," thought the odd little alien,

"a horrible, ugly monster like me

"does not belong on Earth

with such good and handsome friends."

But where was she to go?

Not even her home planet would take her in

looking as strange as she did.

"I must find a new world," she decided,

one with monsters as horrible and ugly as I."

Hello, fellow ugly monsters.

Gonk. Gonk.