I Love Lucy

Philip Morris presents Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz in I Love Lucy.

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And now let's join Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz in I Love Lucy.

They're working frantically over him.

They're trying to get him on his feet in the next round.

Yeah, Fred, he looks like he's going to owe me five bucks.

No, that's pure luck.

If they get him on his feet, he'll murder that Daniels in the next round.

They're working furiously over Schultz.

His seconds are fanning him.

He doesn't seem to be responding too well.

Sit down, Fred.

That won't help him.

Come on, sit down.

There goes a 10-second warning.

Schultz is on his feet and ready to answer.

The bell.

Pardon me, fellas.

There's a show I got to see.

Hey, hey.

We have the very latest creation in evening wear.

Ethel, we were watching the fights.

What's the matter with you?

Now, just a minute.

If I'm nice enough to babysit while Lucy goes shopping, the least you can do is look at the show I want to see.

But, Ethel, it's only three more rounds through the fights.

Why don't you go downstairs and watch your program?

You go downstairs.

I'm babysitting.

Well, look, we'll babysit until you get back, huh?

All right.

The next group of original creations features the very latest in...

Well, friends, there it is.

We don't have to tell you what happened.

You saw it with your very own eyes.

That's the beauty of television.

What happened?

What happened?

Now we return you to our studios for seven minutes of organ music.

Oh, nah.

Organ music.

This time I'm going to go to the fights in person.

You want to come with me, Fred?

Sure.

I do.

But how are we going to get out of the house?

You know how crazy the girls get when we go to the fights and leave them sitting home?

Oh, you're saturating.

I'm not saturating.

How about our anniversary when you and I wanted to go to the fights?

Which anniversary?

Oh, two or three years ago.

We had tickets for the fights, but Ethel was all keyed up and wanted to go to some fancy place for our anniversary.

Yeah.

Here, you missed something on this one.

That's a design.

It is?

Sure, can't you see?

Flowers against the background of gravy.

I've been meaning to talk to you about Monday night.

We want you and Ricky to help us celebrate.

It's our wedding anniversary.

Oh, yours and Fred's?

No, me and Gregory Peck.

We've been married for 18 years, and I vowed that at least once before I

died, Fred was going to take me to a nightclub on our wedding anniversary.

Well, that sounds reasonable.

Now, this is my plan.

We'll go in there, and I'll say, I know what let's do next Monday night.

Let's go to a nightclub.

And you second the motion.

Then Ricky will bow to his feet and say, that's great.

Then Fred will have to take me, because if Ricky... Ricky bounds to his feet and says, that's great?

Right.

Wrong.

Ricky hates nightclubs.

But he works in one.

Your life should be just one gay round of nightclubs.

Yeah, that's what I thought when I married a bandleader.

But ever since we said I do, there are so many things we don't.

Well, it was a good idea while it lasted.

Gee.

It was gonna be the Copacabana.

The Copacabana.

Uh-huh.

Gee.

Well, don't you worry.

We'll go.

We will?

Sure.

I want to go as much as you do.

But don't forget you can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar.

You mean beer?

We'll be nice to the boys?

Yeah, we'll be so lovey-dovey to them that they'll be sitting in a nightclub before they know what hit them.

Oh, that ought to do it.

Hey, Rick, are you doing anything Monday night?

I don't think so.

It's my night off.

Why?

I'd like you to join me in commemoration of an 18-year-old tragedy.

What do you mean?

Well, it's our wedding anniversary.

Oh, you want us to join you in a celebration?

I prefer to think of it as a grim reminder.

I'd like to go over to Charlie's Steakhouse and then take in the fights.

Oh, you dreamer, you.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

I don't know, Fred.

If you want to go to the fights, I think you should.

After all, it's your anniversary.

There must be some way we can get the girls to go to the fights.

Yeah, we could tie them in sacks and carry them in.

I tell you what.

As soon as they come into the living room, we'll be real nice to them, see?

See?

Soft-soak them a little.

Smoosh them up.

Smoosh?

Ethel?

Now, look, everybody knows you can get around a woman with a little sweet talk.

Yeah, well, that's all right for Lucy, but it's a little longer trip around Ethel.

Do you want to go to the Pfizer dungeon?

All right, all right, I'll smoosh.

Okay, now, lay it on... How do four people use so many dishes?

I don't know.

What's the matter?

What you standing up for?

Because two gorgeous ladies entered the room.

They did?

Where?

They mean us.

Oh, you great big Latin lover, you.

Ah, you sweet, handsome man, you.

You gorgeous, exciting woman, you.

I pass.

Isn't he cute?

Darling, why don't you sit down here?

Oh, yes, you sit down too, baby.

Well, you sit down in my lap.

You'll be more comfortable.

All right.

You sit there, darling.

This chair's more comfortable.

Oh, but if it's so comfortable, I want you to have it.

Ethel, the one thing that I ask you, will you please?

I said sit down!

Don't you think you're overdoing it a little?

Oh, watch it.

Oh, sorry.

Thank you very much.

That's all right.

Isn't she sweet?

Oh, thank you, Lucy.

Lucy, thank you very much.

It's all right.

Light, light.

Would you like it?

Yeah, I'll get it.

You know, Ricky, baby, there's only one time you look handsomer than you do now, and that's when you wear a tuxedo.

Oh, yes.

I think a tuxedo is the best looking thing a man can wear.

Unless he's wearing boxing trunks.

Speaking of boxing, there's nothing more exciting than a ringside seat.

Yes, sir, a ringside seat at the Copacabana.

Yeah.

Well, look, Lucy, Monday's Fred's anniversary, and he wants to go to the fights.

Yeah, well, Monday's Ethel's anniversary, too, and she wants to go to a nightclub.

Yeah, well, Fred is not going to go to any stuffy nightclub.

Well, Ethel's not going to any stale fights.

Lucy, don't push me too far.

It's the fights or nothing.

Well?

Is that final?

Final.

Well, you brought this on yourself.

Ethel wants a divorce.

Good.

No, she doesn't.

No, I don't.

Well, honey, you said you wanted to go to a nightclub.

Yeah, why don't you mind your own business?

I mean, maybe the fellas want to go.

Wait a minute, will you?

Everybody be calm.

We'll figure out a way to settle this thing.

I know, the Democratic way.

We'll put it to a vote.

Couldn't you guess how it's going to come out?

Well, try it anyhow.

All right, everybody wants to go to the fights, raise their hand.

One, two.

Everybody wants to go to the nightclub, raise their hand.

One, two, three.