The Lizzie Bennet Diaries

It is a truth universally acknowledged

that a single man in possession of a good fortune...

must be in want of a wife.

My mom gave each of us one of these last Christmas.

I have yet to wear it... ever.

Who am I? I'm a 24 year-old grad student with a mountain of student loans

living at home and preparing for a carreer.

But to my mom, the only thing that matters is that I'm single.

My name is Lizzie Bennet, and this is my life.

So my mom belongs to a class of parents

I like to call the 2.5 WPF club.

What's the 2.5 WPF club?

It stands for Home with 2.5 kids and a White Picket Fence.

Which I know actually sounds pretty nice,

but it's really annoying when it's all your mom talks about 24/7.

Not only is my mom a member of the 2.5 WPF club,

she's probably the president.

How do I know? Ladies and gentlemen, I present again: exhibit A.

"Universal truth"? Really?

I'm sure there are a great number of rich,

young, single men who aren't looking for wives.

In fact, let's examine the percentages.

Sleezeballs and scumbags,

incapable of escaping current dead-end relationships,

sailing around the world trying to find themselves,

focusing on work, or skills, or hobbies, or whatever

it is that rich guys do when they're young.

But no, according to my mother, every rich single guy is put on

this planet to inpregnate her daughters.

To illustrate my point, I'll need a little help.

What are you doing?