Real Genius

Crossbow, this is Watchdog.

Confirm all transmissions on Discriminator.

Roger, Watchdog.

Crossbow is on Discriminator.

All systems are go.

Roger, we mark you go for maneuvering sequence.

Watchdog, this is Crossbow.

I am established.

Confirm we are go for arm.

Affirmative, Crossbow.

At this time, select electrics to max.

Select vents to open and select systems to onboard.

Roger, Crossbow is armed.

Roger.

We now have ground confirmation.

Rabbit is in the hole.

Moving target indicator engauged.

Pathfinder is on.

I'm going on the scope.

Roger.

Scanner on.

Target locked.

Tracking locked.

Roger.

Easy does it.

That's it.

Hold it right there.

The Crossbow Project.

There's no defense, like a good offense.

Mission accomplished.

Outstanding, Crossbow.

Just like shooting ducks in a barrel.

Working in secret, our scientists are turning

an engineering dream into an effective reality.

Now all we have to do is build it.

Nice little weapon, isn't it, Dave?

What do you think of Don's little movie, Roy?

I think there weren't enough girls in it.

Well, I have a little tape now on alternate weapon uses,

plans for the mini shuttle,

and modifications on the B-1 for aerial launch.

Does the president or any other responsible agency know about this?

We're on a need-to-know basis, George.

Besides, the CIA is a responsible agency.

Well, I think they do need to know.

You're going to single-handedly cause a major escalation.

Our studies indicate that this type of... of weapon is totally useless in warfare.

Well, it's not intended for use in your kind of warfare, Roy.

It's a perfect peacetime weapon. That's why it's secret.

So it's both immoral and unethical.

Yes.

When do we get it?

As I understand it, there seems to be a small, technical, uh, teeny-weeny little

problem with the energy source.

I don't want to hear about any problems, Don.

We have plans for your little Ray Gun this summer.

I need a success here.

I don't need any delays jeopardizing that success.

Am I making myself clear, Don?

Oh, clear as vodka, Dave.

You tell that Dr. Hathaway to get on the stick.

Well, I guess I'm just going to have to push a little harder then, huh?

Just as long as we have a working weapon by the end of June.

Right General?

I wouldn't know, Dave.

I haven't had a working weapon since Korea.

I'm sorry, Dave.

This is too much.

I'm going to have to ask for a reassignment.

I'm sorry to hear that, George.

I urge you to stop.

Thanks for your input.

Sorry, you won't be on the team.

Maybe next time.

Too bad.

Used to be a good man.

I'm afraid we're gonna have to liberate, George.

Liberate?

You mean... liquidate?

Larry, let's see that film on blinding techniques.

Then we'll all have some lunch, all right?

Excuse me.

- Could you sign this, please? - Are you Dr. Hathaway?

Yes, I am.

You know, I just love your television show.

Oh, thank you very much.

Look, listen.

Tell me, what is Mr. Einstein really like?

Dead.

See, Dad, laser means light amplification by stimulated emissions of radiation.

So this is coherent light.

Oh, so it talks, right?

No.

Ah! Dr. Hathaway, what a surprise!

How are you, Mrs. Daley.

Is there something wrong with Mitch's test scores?

If there is, it's because I had the flu and I

couldn't make him a decent breakfast that morning.

I tried making him waffles.

Well, I thought I'd fly in, and I'd bring you the news myself.

I just got word from the admissions committee.

We did it.

Mitch is in the Pacific 10th.

Hey!

Way to go, boy!

Don't shake his head. Don't never shake his head.

How you doing, Mitch?

Fine.

It's a nice display here.

Thanks.

It's a flash lamp-lamp-pumped ultraviolet laser at 342 nanometers.

Well, as you know, there is considerable

interest in the atomic iodine laser for fusion.

This is molecular iodine.

Therefore, this laser doesn't suffer from the

problem of recombination of the atomic iodine.

You must be very proud.

Proud?

Oh, yeah, sure.

Mitch is the first student we've ever accepted for midwinter term at Pacific 10.

Well, I imagine he's the youngest, too.

No, actually, the youngest we ever had was 12.

But he cracked under the pressure within six months, so we...

Mitch is 15. There's not going to be any problem with that.

Right. Say, listen, Doc, about this scholarship thing.

Now, uh, you're going to give him a signing bonus, right?

No.

But by allowing Mitch to progress in an accelerated rate, We give him the

opportunity to fulfill a far greater portion

of his remarkable intellectual potential.

We just want the best for Mitchie.

Dr. Hathaway. I saw your show the other night on radioactive isotopes,

and I've got a question for you.

Yes?

Is that your real hair?

Yeah?

I tell you, is Mitch by any chance adopted?

Oh, I know.

It's amazing.

Isn't it?

Look, if I don't get something to eat, I'm going to die. Come on.

Bye, Dr. Hathaway.

Good-bye.

They're really all right.

It's just sometimes they have no idea what I'm talking about.

I'm sure about that.

So tell me, Mitch, are you going to miss your friends?

Well, no. I think I intimidate other kids.

Good boy.

Mitch, there's something you're going to have to understand.

Compared to you, most people have the IQ of a carrot.

We're different than most people, Mitch.

Better.

I'm... I'm...

I'm... Yes.

One second.

One second.

One second.

I've decided to put you on my own research team

with some of the finest minds on the campus.

This is only the second time I've ever given such an honor to a freshman.

The first one was Chris Knight in 1981, right?

You heard of Chris?

Yes, he's a legend in the National Physics Club.

Well, you're going to be working with Chris.

He's a senior now, and he's as brilliant as he ever was.

Wow!

As soon as you graduate, this job will be waiting for you, Chris.

Great.

We have a complete physical plant right over here.

- You have a jacuzzi? - Absolutely!

Good.

And the labs and offices are right over this way.

Follow me, please.

Guys, I want you to meet Chris Knight.

Chris, this is my assistant, Sherry Nugel.

- Pleased to meet you. - Nice to meet you.

And this is Mike Dodd.

Doctor Dodd?

The one who just designed our brand new telecom satellite.

It's an honor to meet you, sir.

Telecom.

Isn't that the satellite that's raining debris all over Europe?

Why is that toy on your head?

Because if I wear it anywhere else, it chafes.

I'm sorry.

It's just that I didn't want you guys to think I was stuffy.

You know, no fun.

All brain, no penis.

Pardon me?

I'm sorry.

It's just an infantile response to authority.

Yes.

You are Chris Knight, aren't you?

I hope so. I'm wearing his underwear.

It's a joke. I get it. That's funny.