Bob Hearts Abishola

Previously on Bob Hearts Abishola...

- The food is delicious. - Mmm.

Yes, very good.

They put on a nice wedding here, too.

Are you thinking of one couple in particular?

A mother can dream, right?

- So can aunties. - Aw!

So, what's the first step?

Abishola needs to finalize her divorce in Nigeria.

And they'll need to start looking

into neighborhood schools for Dele.

And I'll have my lawyer draw up a prenup.

What?

Well, it's just this thing you sign

to make sure everybody hangs on to what's theirs.

We know what it is.

But why does Abishola need one?

Do you think she wants Bob's money?

No, but it's a family business,

and it needs to stay in the family.

But wouldn't Abishola be a part of the family?

Well, yeah.

Sorta.

Do you remember, a moment ago, you asked us to tell you

when you are being offensive?

It's happening now.

_

Hey, Bobby, check it out.

What has two thumbs and just buttoned

her own blouse?

For real?

Bam!

Aw! Mom, that's great!

I told you you could do it.

Maybe someday soon I'll be able to play the piano.

I didn't know you played.

I don't.

Excuse me.

Hello, Uncle.

No, I still have more work to do.

How close are you?

Yes, I assumed that was you.

All right. I'll be out as soon as I'm done.

Invite them in.

Bob would like you and Auntie to come in.

Yes, his mother is here.

They will wait outside.

Come on. It's freezing out there.

They know that.

Give me the phone.

Tunde, come in the house.

Yeah, I get that my mother sickens you.

Uh-huh.

"Blonde devil witch."

That's good. I'll use that.

Tell those cheap grifters I'm right here

and I can use my thumb now.

Mom says hi.

Uh-huh.

Yeah. Oh.

They say hi back.

Hang on. I'm coming out.

You let those people in here, and I'm leaving.

Oh, no. My mother will no longer live with me?

What will I do?

I'll talk to them.

Give me the phone.

No.

Days like this, I miss Nigeria.

Yes. I never saw my breath before I came to America.

Roll down the window.

Oh, hello, Bob. Good to see you.

Yeah. Good to see you, too.

Look, Abishola needs a few more minutes.

- Please come inside. - No.

We will not be in the same house as that woman.

You hit my shoe.

- Sorry. - Come on.

We'll order some takeout.

We'll talk this through like civilized people.

Your mother is the one who is not civilized.

Again, you hit my shoe.

Please, for me?

I cannot say no to that face.

_

I hope you know I don't lump you in

with your money-grubbing relatives.

That's very kind of you.

I mean, I don't know what you're doing with my son,

but, what the hell, everybody's got blind spots.

Take your pills.

I miss the yellow ones.

They really kicked ass.

Make yourselves comfortable. I'll put the kettle on.

Uh, we'll wait here.

Tunde, please, sit.

Hello, Dottie.

Tunde.

Olu.

Dottie.

This is nice,

everyone sitting and talking.

Very nice.

I just want to say one thing.

The three of you arguing about a prenup

is totally ridiculous.

Listen to him. He's right.

You're worried about what'll happen

to Abishola and I if we get divorced

when we barely have a relationship.

"Barely"?

- You know what I mean. - No. Tell me.

Oh, Bob.

I'm just saying, we're a work in progress.

We're still laying the foundation.

We're, uh, you know, taking baby steps.

Honey, you really need to stop talking.

Yes, you do.

It just got cold in here, too.

_

When you think about it,

we really did get a little ahead of ourselves.

Yes.

What kind of future can they have

if Bob continues to speak his mind?

Oh.

He's like his father that way.

Every time that man opened his mouth,

he somehow managed to stick a Hush Puppy in it.

Hush Puppy.

A man after my own heart.

I'm glad to see you are doing so well.

Thank you.

Wouldn't have happened without your niece.

I was ready to give up.

She wouldn't let me quit.

She is very stubborn.

When she sets her mind to something,

good luck trying to change it.

- Please! Come back inside! - Why?

To be with a man I barely have a relationship with?

That was for their benefit!

- You and me, we're gold! - We are a joke!

Which is why, someday, we'll look back at this and laugh!

"Hey, remember the time I got frostbite

trying to get you back in the house?"

Go away.

I don't want to see you right now.

Nope! I'm staying!

If I lose a pinky toe, screw it...

it died for love!

Starting to get brittle right now!

You understand why we are overprotective.

Abishola is the closest thing we have

- to our own child. - Oh.

She's a good one.

Hey, if you ever want 38-year-old twins,

I've got a couple that are priced to move.

Dottie.

Thanks, Tunde.

Olu.

I thought you are not allowed to drink.

I'm not. Cheers.

Did you two ever consider adopting a baby?

The only thing that was considered

was for Tunde to take a second wife.

He was gonna divorce you?

No. In Nigeria,

men are allowed to have as many wives as they can afford.

Or stand.

My family insisted that I marry again.

Oh, why didn't you?

I did not want to share my life

- with anyone but Olu. - Aw.

Besides, she is already like having many wives.

What does that mean?

Your constantly changing moods.

Sometimes it is like a new wife

walks in halfway through a conversation.

Eh.

Open mouth, insert Hush Puppy.

Hey, why don't you guys stay for dinner?

You can meet the twins and see what you think.

They could really use a loving home.

If there is something that is upsetting you,

just be honest about it.

It's not so much stuff that upsets me

as much as it's different than what I'm used to.

Eh. And what are you used to?

O-Okay, well, typically,

a few months into dating an American woman,

there would be...

Aw, geez, I don't know any other way to say it.

Sex.

Oh!

So, for you, we have to have sex to be in a real relationship.

No!

Well, I don't know. Maybe.

You understand I've never had sex with a man

outside of marriage.