Hounded

Woman: Jay, Breakfast Is Ready!

Be Down In A Second, Mom!

Hey, Morning, Mom.

Morning, Sweetie.

Hey, I Had This Tight Dream Last Night

That You Made Me French Toast And Bacon.

You're Good.

Listen, Honey, I Got A Call

From Aunt Lois This Morning.

She Is In The Hospital.

What Happened?

Broke Her Ankle.

Heh! Again?

The Other Ankle.

That Woman Was Not Meant To Ski.

Well, Is She Gonna Be Ok?

Mmm, She'll Be Fine,

But She Just Can't Get Around.

I'm Gonna Have To Go Down There,

And I'll Probably Have To Stay About A Week.

No Problem, Mom, I Can Take Care Of Myself,

And Don't Say I'm Too Young.

Fine, But Just So You're Not Lonely,

I've Spoken With Your Brother

And He's Agreed To Come Down From Starkwell

To Keep You Company.

Mom! Come On, Give Me A Break!

Mike's Just Gonna Yell At Me

And Boss Me Around All Day.

He Hates Me.

No, He Doesn't. He Worries About You.

It's Just How He Shows He Cares.

Well, I'd Be A Whole Lot Happier

If He Cared Just A Little Bit Less.

Heh! Look, I'm Gonna Leave You Enough Money

To Get You Through Next Week.

There Are Frozen Dinners In The Freezer.

Use The Money To Buy Some Healthy Food.

Don't Just Eat Junk Food All Week, Ok?

Ok. Just 5 Days Out Of 7.

Listen, I'm Sorry

I'm Going To Miss The Awards Ceremony Tonight.

It's Ok, Mom. I Haven't Won Yet.

And Who Knows-- You Might Not Be Missing Anything.

I May Stink Out Loud Today.

I Doubt That,

But No Matter What Happens...

I Am Very, Very Proud Of You.

And I Know Your Dad Would Be Twice As Proud.

Mom...

You Don't Think Dad Would've Been Disappointed

If I Didn't Go To Starkwell, Do You?

You Just Win That Scholarship To Peterson.

Forward March!

Left! Left! Left, Right, Left!

Left! Left! Left, Right, Left!

Left, Left,

Platoon, Halt!

Right Face!

Parade Rest!

Now, Gentlemen,

You Are The Sorriest Bunch Of Invertebrates

It Has Ever Been My Displeasure

To Be In Command Of!

Your Bunks This Morning Were Ridiculous!

If You Want To Be Starkwell Men

You Have Got To Do Better Than That!

Officer: Sergeant Martin?

Attention!

Colonel Douglas Wants To See You Asap.

Platoon...Dismissed!

Cadets : Starkwell!

Yes, All Right, Sir.

You Wanted To See Me, Sir?

Cadet Martin, I Understand Your Squad

Is Close To Failing The Semester.

It's Not My Fault.

The Guys Are Just Lazy.

The Squad's Grades Are Down

Because Of Them, Not Me, Sir.

At Ease, Mike.

Listen, Son, You Work Hard Around Here.

You Know Your Regulations Forwards And Backwards,

But You Don't Know Jack About Being A Leader.

Being A Leader Is More Than Just Yelling And Screaming

And Blaming Everything On Everybody Else.

These Men Are Like Your Brothers.

Listen, When Your Dad Taught Here, He Told Me Something.

He Said, "A Man Will Follow Orders If He Fears You,

But He'll Save Your Life If He Loves And Respects You."

Now, Captain Pennick Told Me About Your Situation At Home.

I Suggest You Take This Time Off

And You Seriously Think About Whether Or Not

You're Suited For A Career In The Military,

And Believe Me, Son, It's Not For Everyone.

Excuse Me. Hand It Over!

This Is A School, Not A Video Arcade.

Why Do You Think Your Grades Are Down?

I'm Keeping This. You Won't Get It Back Till Next Semester,

If You Get It Back At All.

Hey, Who's The Lucky Kid Van Dusen's Picking On Today?

Nina Morris.

She's In My Little Brother's Class.

She's Really Nice.

They Always Are.

Boy: Bombs Away!

Heh Heh Heh!

Ugh!

Uh, That Was Me.

Meanwhile, The Privileged Few

Continue To Get Away With Anything.

It's Unfair With A Capital "U".

Oh!

Check These Out.

It's My Newest One.

That's Great, Jay.

Let Me See That.

Hey, Be Careful With Those.

My Presentation Is On The Other Side.

Morn--

Morning, People.

I'm Gonna Try And Keep It Brief This Morning.

We Have Just 2 Items Of Business To Attend To.

First, If Any Of You Had The Spanish Rice

For Lunch Yesterday,

Please See Nurse Ketcham If You're Feeling...

Different.

Second, All Eighth Graders Should Report

To The Auditorium For Fifth Period

For The Donald Peterson Memorial Award Competition.

All The Finalists For The Award

Will Be Called Up Onto The Stage.

I Want To Thank You For Your Time.

Have A Nice Day, And, Oh,

Let's Try And Stuff Our Brains

With Things We Don't That Already Know, Shall We?

This Is So Cool.

Watch This!

Jay, Are You Ok?

That Tickle, Buddy? Ha Ha!

Ronny! Enough With The Soccer!

Get To Class!

Later, Guys.

Hurry Up And Collect Those, Mr. Martin.

Uh-Oh, Jay.

No Problem, Mr. Van Dusen.

Not A Very Flattering Likeness Of Me.

Oh!

Oh, That's Not You, Mr. Van Dusen.

Perhaps We Should Discuss Your Artistic Endeavors With Your Mother.

Give Me The Rest.

But, Mr. Van Dusen, I Need Those.

My Presentation Is On The Other Side.

At The Risk Of Sounding Like I'm Saying,

"You Should Have Thought Of That Before,"

Well, You Should Have Thought Of That Before!

You'll Have To Rewrite Them On More Appropriate Cards.

Bad Attitude.

But I Can't Believe This!

I'm Dead! There's No Time

To Write Out That Whole Presentation Over Again.

People, How Are We, Hmm?

We're Busy Here, Ronny.

So, Uh...

So, Martian, I Hear

You're My Main Competition For The Scholarship.

That's Not His Name,

And If You're His Competition

I Wouldn't Call It Very Competitive.

Can It, Jerk.

Anyway...Hey, Hi.

Yeah, I Wanted To Invite You

To A Little Victory Party That I'm Throwing

After I Win The Donald Peterson Award.

I'm Throwing A Little Victory Bash In My Pool House.

I'm Busy.

I Wasn't Talking To You.

Hope To See You There, Trace.

Gentlemen.

Don't Worry. You're Gonna Mop Up The Floor With Him.

The Only Downside Is That We Won't Get

To Go To The Party At His Pool House.

Way To Be Supportive.

I'm Serious! That Pool House Is Amazing.

It's Like He's Got His Own Place.

He's Got His Own Phone With His Own Number.

It's Got A Pool Table, Video Games.

I Hear It Even Has A Pool.

Teacher: Ok, Class, Let's Get To Work.

[Electronic Game Beeping And Zapping]

Ha Ha! Ooh!

You Wanted To Speak To Me, Dad?

Are You Prepared For This Presentation?

Oh, Yeah, Yeah.

I've Got The Winning Speech Right Here.

It's Not That Ridiculous Idea You Had

Why Jackie Chan Would Make A Cool President, Is It?

Uh...

Look, You,

Your Grandfather Doesn't Think