Last Man Standing

I'm sure my mug got mixed in with your stuff last time we went camping.

- Really? - Yeah.

'Cause generally, you put the heavy stuff in my backpack.

Well, we have to find it.

It's my lucky mug.

I'm going hunting for three days.

You want me to get eaten by a bear?

Not gonna happen. Bears don't like gristle.

Oh! Dad!

Mr. Alzate! You're busy.

Don't bother reading this.

Just sign it right here real quick.

You know what? I don't generally sign things I haven't read.

That's how you end up married or in the army.

Either way, you're going to war.

And you'll never pick out your own clothes again.

Classic. Ed, tell me about the war.

Dad, sign this.

- What is this? - It's for my Business Management class.

It just says that I followed you around for 20 hours.

But you haven't followed me around.

Yeah, but I follow you on Twitter, and I feel like that's enough.

I'll sign the paper, but you have to come to work with me.

Seriously?

Do you really want to do this?

I mean, neither one of us wants to spend 20 hours together.

Maybe over the course of a year, but crammed together into one week?

Listen to this, honey.

Eve's worked at Outdoor Man.

Kristin has the restaurant down there.

You're my only daughter who hasn't spent any time

at the business I spent most of my life helping to build, okay?

Found it!

That's your special mug?

Bears are terrified of stainless steel, right?

What do I look like, a scientist?

It just works, that's all.

And just hold your water!

This came with a matching spoon.

Why don't I go look for the matching spoon?

The mug is useless without a spoon, right?

Mandy. Yeah.

You got to do this for your dad.

- (Whining) Why? - Because he'd like it!

Come on, don't you want to know what he does?

I already know what he does.

He sells stuff that if you leave it outdoors, it's fine.

No, there's a little more to it than that.

Now, he wouldn't say this, but he would love to show off for you.

Come on, give it a shot. What do you say?

- (Groans) - It would make your dad happy.

Come on.

Mike: Hey! Huh?

Found your little folding spoon that goes with the mug.

It was right next to this crazy straw.

Must be yours, huh?

No, no, it's not, but I'll take it.

That'll scare a bear, I'll tell you.

Yes, sirree!

Mandy, good luck working with your dad this week, huh? Thanks, man.

So you're going?

I will be there at 10:00 with bells on.

8:00. I will be there at 8:00, but there will be no bells.

You know what's amazing is you just didn't forge my signature.

You've really lost a step since high school.

I can't believe how you handled yourself in that meeting.

I'm a born leader, honey.

Yeah.

No, I mean, there was all that free food and you didn't touch any of it.

It's easy because I don't like deviled eggs.

Morning, Mr. B. Morning, Kyle.

I see you have a new management trainee.

She's very attractive.

Stop it.

Hey, hey, hey!

That's harassment.

You are fired!

But I liked it.

You're rehired.

Oh, good.

For one second, I had no idea what I was gonna do with my life.

All right, Kyle, what is on our docket for today?

Uh, you know, just the usual.

Uh, have any problems around here that my daughter might enjoy watching

rather than me work at the computer?

A problem in the store...

- Mm-hmm. - Let me think.

Chuck: No, you don't know what you're talking about, so just shut up!

No, you shut up, okay? (Groans)

'Cause I held Beverly's Fabrics to five runs.

Those gals can hit!

Beverly's Fabrics.

I beat Der Wienerschnitzel!

Guys, can you keep it down?

I'm trying to think of a work problem for Mr. B. to deal with.

It's right here in front of me!

There's that one flip-flop still in Lost and Found.

Mike, we need you to solve a problem.

- Work-related? - Absolutely.

We need a new starting pitcher for the softball team,

and that should be me, right?

He's wrong, right?

Mike, am I wrong?

Almost always, Joe. Almost always.

It's a borderline work-personal problem, but I'm on a roll, so...

Look, I'm a better pitcher than he is.

Anybody with eyes can see that.

Compelling argument backed up by science.

Except he's an idiot.

Also backed up by science.

All right, all right, all right.

After careful deliberation, I'll make a decision.

You're both wasting my time!

Okay. Agreed.

But you're never gonna get that part of your life back, so who should pitch?

I'm gonna go with George.

Who's George?

I don't know, but I'll find him.

It's a big city, okay?

No. No, no.

That's not fair!

Fair went out with Obama.

Now get back to work!

You know, it worked out for the best.

I didn't want to have to buy a new glove.

Yeah, what do you want to do now?

- Get some lunch? - Hey, I'm buying!

I got that glove money burning a hole in my pocket.

Nice work. No problem is too small for you to handle, huh?

Or too big.

I've worked out a way to defeat ISIS 10 times in my mind.

Boom. I found the other one.

And they're mine.

I told you my kickboxing class was fun.

I loved it when you took down the instructor.

Well, she said to hit her, and I knew she was expecting it,

so I went for a leg sweep.

Teacher got taught.

Hey, Kris. Hey, Mom.

Oh, Evie, hey. Uh, listen, honey, I need you to be home this afternoon.

The guy is coming to fix the Internet.

Somebody broke the Internet?

Yeah. Yeah.

I believe that one person broke the 75 million servers

which comprise the global network which we call "the Internet."

Yeah, 'cause me old, me not understand.

Ooh, looks like Mom had a leg sweep of her own.

Okay, sure, I'll do it.

I mean, what kid wouldn't love

to sit around the house all day with no Internet?

Hey, could you break the TV while you're at it

so there's absolutely nothing to do?

Thank you. I'd do it, but I am tutoring from 1:00 to 4:00,

then I have to have a staff meeting to go over the lesson plan

and then get back here to do the laundry.

Geez, Mom.

You should come to my kickboxing class, work off some of that stress.

Hitting strangers is way more calming than meditation.

Well, I appreciate the offer, but I am not stressed.

Mom, you just rattled off a laundry list of things to do

that actually included doing the laundry.

Well, that's because I am busy.

I'm not stressed. And I like being busy.

Even so, you should come with us!

It's fun, and plus, kickboxing's a great workout.

Okay, okay.

It sounds like a "kick."

And, besides, you girls have kind of "boxed" me in.

People are gonna be lining up to hit her.

Hey. What did I miss?

Oh, a big management lesson.

Candice downstairs had a bad cough, so I... I let her go home.

Could have been Zika.

I might have saved hundreds of lives.

Hey, you know, I told my teacher about how you handled

that Chuck and Joe thing yesterday.

Um, he said you were wrong.

Well, he is the face of 21 huge stores across the Southwest.

Oh, wait a minute. No, that's not him.

That's me.

See, the textbook outlines a four-step process for conflict resolution.

You didn't do any of them.

Because it's not a four-step process.

One step.

Yell at them, make fun of them, get them back to work.

That would actually be three steps.

But shutting problems down like that

just allows them to fester and grow below the surface.

Well, it's their surface, and I really don't want to know what's... festering.

Okay.

Hey, guys.

How's it going?

Oh, great.

Cronuts.

Surface.

Hey, um, so, is everything actually great out here?

Oh. Yeah.

Didn't you hear me? Cronuts.

Mandy: Yeah.

Yeah, I just feel like maybe my dad shut you guys down a little quickly