Deathrow Gameshow

It's time for

Live or Die.

Now here's the host and star of the show,

Chuck Toedan.

Hello everybody

and welcome to Live or Die,

the game show that gives those condemned prisoners

one last chance

before their final bow in life.

Now as you remember when we ran out of time yesterday,

we were about to make that final judgment

on 9372.

Let's see how he's doing today.

9372, how ya feeling?

I'm a little nervous, Chuck!

- Well we won't keep you waiting any longer.

You're familiar with the rules of the game?

If you fail to answer the question correctly,

you will lose your head.

Anyone here rooting for you today?

Well my family's here Chuck.

Where are they?

Can we get a shot of them'?

- Well I never thought he'd amount to anything!

Ready?

Ready Chuck.

Okay.

Your question is

what is the title of this famous movie?

Watch the monitor.

God damnit, son of a bitch.

Mother fucking shit God damnit.

Okay.

For an instant reprieve,

what was the name of that movie?

- I don't go to the movies much Chuck

but it could be.

Sorry time's up!

That was Curses of the Mummy.

Oh no Chuck.

- But wait before you lose your head,

we'll give you a chance to win some money for your family.

Now if your head falls in the basket face up,

we'll give them 10 thousand dollars.

Okay?

Okay Chuck.

Try to flip it up honey!

Come on Dad!

You can do it!

Okay.

Here we go!

Let's wait for the word from our judges.

Ourjudges say it's face up!

Congratulations, you've won!

We'll be back with more of Live or Die

after these messages.

I And shake the hand oi God

I Think of all the criminals just sittin around

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

We hate Chuck!

Evening ladies!

Thank you guys.

Take care.

See you tomorrow ladies!

Good afternoon.

It's a killer day in LA

and you're tuned to the pulsating sounds

of Larry Lacienica on KLT FM,

the station that throbs with rock,

playing the kind of music you lovebirds out there

might just want to screw to.

We'd like to remind our alcoholic friends out there

not to drive while drinking.

You could spill it.

Hey!

Hey you!

You're an asshole!

You're a perverted asshole!

I've been watching your show for two years

and I think it's sick!

Where the fuck do you get off

killing innocent people!

_ Hello?

Yeah?

Oh shit.

Is he all right'?

Fine

What time?

Okay.

Good morning.

Good morning.

Do I know you'?

You're my favorite TV host.

You here all night?

God you're so neat!

Would you please leave?

- Hey I know a lot of people hate you and your show

but I'm behind you 100 percent!

Thank you.

Are you leaving?

- Hey do you think maybe you could get my boyfriend

on your show?

He's doing 65 to life for molesting a collie

in front of a Catholic school.

I'll see what I can do.

Now will you please leave'?

God thanks so much Chuckie!

God Chuckie you're so cool!

Hey does it bother you if people call you Chuckie'?

I know that sometimes when you

when your band leader calls you Chuckie

you get little pissed.

It doesn't bother you that much though really does it'?

Oh Chuckie, you're so neat!

Hey, hey Chuckie.

Do you ever have sex with your contestants

before they go on your show?

No.

They have it with each other.

Oh wow.

I love you Chuckie!

_ Hello?

Yeah.

We might have a bit of a problem with one of our contestants

number 1768.

Nothing too serious.

I got a call from his warden this morning.

It seems he was gang raped in the cell last night.

Well he's a little tired.

Oh no he'll still go on.

He just won't be sitting.

Come on kids!

Come on.

Hi!

Hi!

Hi sweetheart!

Have a nice day!

Hello, have a good day!