Awkward.

Previously on Awkward...

You broke up? When?

When I realized I wanted to be with someone more like you.

You said you were never embarrassed of me.

- I lied. - You're 16.

If there's ever a time to be selfish,

it's now.

Hey.

It had been 31 hours-- minus the 2 I could sleep--

of significant self-loathing.

I had cheated on my boyfriend.

And with time travel off the table

to undo the dirty deed,

I had to take control

and ensure it would never happen again.

Get in.

What happened last Friday was wrong.

Agreed.

- I love Matty. - I know.

And it is not right to hurt the people you love.

- Couldn't agree more. - So it's done.

- It's done. - Just to clarify,

the "it" means "we." We are done.

- Clarified. - Good.

Great. See you in class.

- Bye. - ? it's a long way home ?

? it's a long way home at last ?

? we're not suffering ?

? the seconds that have passed tonight ?

Mm. No, no, no.

- We can't, we can't. - It was a parting kiss.

- Seal of closure. - Exactly. Now it's--

- We're-- - Over.

? It's a long way home ?

? it's a long way home at last ?

Truce?

? The seconds that have passed tonight ?

Truce.

?

?

I can't believe you just saw that.

I can't believe you just did that.

This is Bonky Kong.

Your Collin dalliance was supposed to be

a one-time special event,

like if I saw five erections

from one direction in my direction.

You said you were just living in the moment

and that the kiss meant nothing.

It didn't mean anything.

Then why did you do it again?

I don't know.

Jenna, once is an accident, twice is an affair.

I was trying to end it.

By shoving your face into his?

Things got out of control.

I know. I saw.

So now, you have two choices.

Either end it with Collin or tell Matty.

Oh, I've tried the first one, and that's not working.

And the second option is never gonna happen.

Then it's all about option three.

- There's a third? - Yeah.

And it entails me telling Matty

because I can't keep a secret.

So if you don't choose option "A" or "B" soon,

option "C" might not be an option

but rather a foregone conclusion.

Jenna, holding on to a secret this big

runs the risk of secret leakage.

What?

You know, when little secrets

spring up and out in my attempt

to hold down the big one.

Help me, Jenna.

If you don't fix this, I might explode,

and there is no telling how many lives I might ruin.

Your secret is safe.

I am amazing at secrets.

I'm not, and I'm even worse with surprises.

Aren't they the same thing?

No. Maybe.

Yes!

Oh, damn it, how am I gonna pull this off?

I have been trying to throw a surprise party for Jenna

since she was three.

And for whatever reason,

she always manages to find out.

Mm, I ordered them for your surprise party.

Shit.

You can wear it for your surprise party.

Shit.

Shit!

The only surprise I've ever pulled off for Jenna

was redoing her room for her 16th birthday.

And the real surprise there was that she left it redone

as long as she did, oof.

I really wanna pull off her party this year.

Can you help?

Can I help?

My middle name isn't "Ta-da" for nothing.

Actually, it wasn't my given name.

I rocked it in college when I worked at a gay bar

and I would show off my man boobs for extra cash.

- Interesting. - It was.

I mean, who knew gay men wanted to see boobs on a dude?

But you're not a dude.

Exactly, which is why it was such a great scam.

Cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching-ching.

Cha-ching.

So Friday!

Can you keep Jenna busy after school

so everyone can get to the house and hide?

You got it, L-dog.

I will take our girl to my favorite dive bar,

put a little hair on her chest, and then drop her off.

Or we can paint mugs at Color Me Mine

and then head over.

I was lost in thought.

I had to tell Matty. What would I say?

Nothing.

Which meant I had to avoid him

until I got back from my guilt trip.

Hey, we need to figure some stuff out.

My guilt trip had been extended.

There's nothing to figure out, it's over.

But it's on Friday.

What's on Friday?

Your birthday.

What do you wanna do to celebrate?

Right, yes. My birthday.

Uh, nothing.

I don't wanna do anything.

Are you sure?

Okay, but think about it.

I'm not gonna let you get out of it that easy.

And I'm not either.

What are you thinking, cheating on Matty?

You need to shut that shit down.

Tamara has such a loud mouth.

Oh-ho-ho, I didn't hear it from Tamara.

I got it from my daily mafia briefing.

The mafia knows?

Is that a rhetorical question?

Of course we do. We're magic.

But don't flip out yet.

Asians not only know how to do great hair,

but they keep things quiet.

Well, great, 'cause I'm on my way to end it right now.

Ming!

You're back!

Am I?

Becca's MIA. Or laying low.

Either way, she's done.

There's nothing to fear.

How was Idaho?

Not bad.

Not good, just safe,

although I'm gonna miss taking ceramics.

I really worked out a lot of my anxiety

throwing a good pot or two.

I even made you a clay hat.

I've missed you, Ming.

Just Ming.

I missed you too.

Why don't you sign up for ceramics here?

I tried, but they're over capacity.

Hmm.

Not anymore. You're in.

_

Huh.

This is crazy, and it needs to stop.

What needs to stop?

Uh, we were just discussing my birthday.

Everyone's making way too big a deal about it.

Interesting, because Matty told me

that no one was making a big deal about it.

You know Matty, right? Jenna's boyfriend.

Sure do.

- You need to watch it. - Watch what?

Whatever it is that's going on

between the two of you.

Even though Matty is blind to your treachery,

I'm not.

I know when something's up,

and something is definitely up.

Really?

Do tell.

Um, we were just discussing

working on...

the assignment together.

I was thinking that we could write a story

about the genesis of a girl

who goes from heinous wallflower to hideous skank.

So it's an autobiographical piece?

Yes.

No, I mean, not about me.

Miss Saxton, don't feign modesty in my class.

Anti-heroes are complicated character studies.

And heinous skanks are pleasures to read and ruin.