The O.W.C.A. Files

Oh!

Oh, no, the mission!

These are the stories of the agents of the O.W.C.A..

These are the O.W.C.A. Files.

Huh?

Huh?

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Agent P, stop right there.

Shut it down. Stop the exercise!

Agent P, nowhere in the O.W.C.A. training manual does it say,

"Abandon your team and apprehend the suspect by yourself."

You're not a lone wolf anymore.

Your team lacks focus, and they need your leadership.

Learn to drive, you jerk.

Heck, one of your trainees didn't even show up...

No, no, I'm here. I'm here.

Just a little late, I'm here. Phew!

But it's okay, I made this to help.

You can't shoot that at a suspect! Are you crazy?!

It would blow them to smithereens! What's the big deal?

I blow up all the time.

Nevertheless, individually, your scores look promising,

but there's still a big problem with teamwork.

Hey, bub, it's just a piece of clip art.

And, Doofenshmirtz, you're lucky you're legally

considered an ocelot, or you wouldn't be here at all.

Yeah, I'd say that's probably the first time

anyone has described my being abandoned by my parents

and raised by Central American wild cats as lucky.

You're gonna be wearing that thing in a second.

Besides, I've, I've given up evil. Look, if you guys can't

pass this training exercise, there's no way you'll complete

Town Square Riot, Freeway Assault,

or Escape the Ancient Ruin.

Agent P, your trainees need to learn how to work together as a team

or they're never gonna earn their black hat bands.

And, uh, Karen?

Karen the Cat. Pay attention. Karen. I'm over here.

Follow the light. That's right.

Now, you're going to have to do the entire training exercise again.

High five!

No, I'm not approving overtime. We'll run it without you day players.

Come on, let's just storm out

as if we have somewhere else to go.

Carl, when you're finished with Agent P's team on the back lot,

return to headquarters immediately. Sorry, Agent P, got to go.

Carry on. And remember, teamwork!

Uh, can we still use this thing?

Well, you know, hopefully that didn't hit anything important.

The dust clears, and here we are! O.W.C.A. Secret Headquarters.

Doesn't look very secret to me. Be that as it may,

today is the day that we will become O.W.C.A.'s first insect agents.

But they never responded to our applications.

Yes, and I can't understand why.

We mailed them in on time, right before the year-end deadline.

Three, two, one!

Happy New Year!

It's possible that our applications have fallen through the cracks.

Which is why we are following up with a personal visit.

That's how you get noticed. And that's how we will become agents.

Imagine fighting international super-villains, traveling to exotic locales.

And I'm gonna get all kinds of cool spy stuff, like a jet pack,

a tuxedo, and scuba fins!

Yeah, that ought to do it.

Napoleon! I can see your house from here!

How about you, Floyd? What do you want?

Uh, a fountain pen that shoots lasers?

Or a car that shoots fountain pens? I want a monkey.

Mmm, yes. For whatever twisted reason,

you shall acquire your primate. Monkey.

Yes, a monkey is a... You know what, never mind.

My point is, now that we're here, all we have to do is get someone's attention.

Ah, here comes a helpful looking lad now. Excuse me, sir...

Obviously we need to try a different approach.

I still want a monkey.

Carl, this new facility is really impressive.

Tell me again where you found the money for all these improvements.

I just solved a small ongoing accounting error.

You kept putting decimal points where you needed to put commas.

Oh, I see! Improper punctuation.

Say, how is Agent P's team shaping up? Well...

Great! Agent P is the best we have.

If anyone can get that team in shape, it's him. Yes, sir, but I...

Carl, isn't it time that we talked about the elephant in the room?

What do you mean, sir? Well, what exactly is he doing?

Obviously something's itching him. And Agent W, too.

It's really taking a toll on our brand new facility.

I don't understand all the itching.

I handed out the new flea collars this morning.

Then something's not right because O.W.C.A. is infested with fleas!

Carl, activate emergency flea protocol 993 alpha.

Agent C, activate emergency flea protocol 993 alpha.

Okay, everyone.

When the sensors stop detecting the presence of fleas,

the doors will automatically open.

Agents, prepare for flea fogging.

This must be our first test, gentlemen!

As agents, we must know how to elude things like deadly toxic clouds.

Just for the record, that was not me. Yes, Wendell, I...

Let's just get down in that drawer.

Look at all this spy equipment.

Some sort of giant cutting device, latex bands,

miles of insect rope, giant fly...

Ahh! Whoa!

What is happening to me?

Look at this magnification apparatus that Floyd has found.

This could be just the thing we need to get noticed.

Okay, that was you. Guilty. Sorry.

Fogging sequence complete. Flea problem solved, sir.

First, the flea collars don't work, and now the fogging doesn't take?

What kind of fleas are these?

Agent D, would you mind? Hmm. Gotcha!

Let me see something.

Okay, gently lower it into place.

Now, all we have to do is get up there...

Aw, nuts!

Look out! Whoa!

There, you see? It's a good thing we let go,

otherwise we would've ended up just like that peanut.

Whoa!

Oh, my gosh, it's a tiny robot!

What kind of a freak would make robot fleas?

Hello! Francis Monogram.

Great googly-moogly! Who are you?

I am Professor Paren-thesis. Although, I'm not really here.

This is a holographic image.

Major, I'm looking up Professor Parenthesis in our database.

There's not much on him.

It's Paren-thesis, not Parenthesis.

Are you sure? Because it's spelt P... You would think I would know

how my own name is pronounced. Yeah, you'd think.

Why are you here? You don't remember me.

We were in biology class together long ago. You barely noticed me.

You're not that guy who kept eating his own hair, are you?

No, that was Jeffrey Stovel.

Were you the kid who got his chin stuck in that graduated cylinder?

No, that was Jennifer Stillwell. And she was a girl!

All you need to know is that I'm the one who sent those flea collars.

Oh! Are you the kid that wore that Robin Hood hat

and passed out in the drinking fountain? Billy Youjeka!

And can we move on, please? Yeah, sorry.

So, why did you send those flea collars?

Well, it's taken me 30 years to come up with a plan this diabolical.

Five of those years were spent in villain's academies.

Then, after school, I started working on that screenplay I always wanted to write.

But revenge was always on my mind, Francis Monogram.

Stop saying my name like that. Did you ever finish that screenplay?

This is my screenplay! Right here.

I'd love to get your notes. Oh, I'd be happy to.

Seriously? You don't remember this jerk?

Were you the kid who... The robot fleas were actually

inside the flea collars that you put on all of your agents.

Now this remote will give me complete control over all of them.

And now, Francis Monogram,

say goodbye to your precious O.W.C.A.!

Seriously, though, I'll email you the screenplay. Tell me what you think.

Sir, he's turned all of our animal agents against us!

Carl, are you familiar with the term "duh"?

What are we gonna do, sir? Do we have any agents on the outside?

Anyone without a collar?

Agent P. Come in, Agent P.

Oh, good, you're all right. We need your help.

O.W.C.A.'s on lockdown. We're trapped!

And all of the agents are being controlled by a sinister fiend

named Professor Parenthesis.

That's Paren-thesis, sir. Oh, right.

Anyway, Parenthesis is using robot fleas

to control our agents' minds. Left turn!

Whoa! He snuck the fleas into O.W.C.A. headquarters

by hiding them in a shipment of flea collars. Right turn!

And now he's... Hey, Carl! Whoa!

Anyway, he's controlling them with a small remote device.

It's up to you and your team to find Parenthesis and destroy that remote.

You're all we've got on the outside, so... Wet floor!

Whoa! Great googly-moogly!

Wow! That sounds kind of serious.

Guess the first thing we should do is start looking for clues. Huh? Huh?

Shipment of flea collars!

It's the box those flea collars came in.

And there's his return address, the "Bottom of the Grand Canyon"!

Hey, hold on a second. Parenthesis! I know that guy!

I met him at an evil convention about three years ago!

Walks around in those pink slippers pushing his screenplay

on everyone. Sure. And now we've got his home address.

Perry the Platypus, we should go to your secret lair and get your hover car...

Okay, fine, just... Just remember, it was my idea!

Well, that did not go as planned.

Hey, Napoleon, there's peanut butter over here.

Floyd, your head is upside down.

There's peanut butter over here, too.

There's peanut butter all over!

Yes, well, there's always a silver lining, isn't there?

I think the problem is we need to be up on their eye level.

Like those guys up there?

Uh, yes and no.

Tell my wife I love her.

While their position is not advantageous,

they are illuminated by a light, which gives me an idea.

Man, you guys are... you guys are fast.