The Office

- Hey. - Hey.

Who are you faxing so early in the morning?

Kinda hard to explain.

I don't have a ton of contact with the Scranton branch,

but before I left, I took a box of Dwight's stationery.

So from time to time, I send Dwight faxes.

From himself.

From the future.

"Dwight, "At 8:00 A.M. today, someone poisons the coffee.

"Do not drink the coffee. "More instructions will follow.

"Cordially, Future Dwight"

Nooo!

You'll thank me later.

Episode 7 "Branch Closing"

The catch 22 team Raceman

There she is.

- Jan Levinson. First thing in the morning. - Michael.

I love to start my day with a hearty bowl of Jan.

- Michael. -"Just call me Levinson"

- "In the morning Baby" - Michael.

Yes.

I'm here to tell you that we are closing the Scranton branch.

I don't understand.

The board voted last night to close your branch.

- On whom's authority? - The board's.

- W-what? - I'm very sorry. I-I...

I don't relish telling you this.

You've been a big part of this company. And the board asked me to thank you

- for your years of service. - You're welcome.

A small number of people will be transferred to the Stamford branch,

and the rest will be getting severance packages.

Am I a small number person or a severance package person?

Well, we haven't made final decisions about personnel yet.

- But you're a severance package person. - Oh, no.

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

- I don't really get it. Because we're not doing that bad,

and our numbers are gonna come up.

Yeah, but it's not all about numbers, Michael.

- Well - It's, it's about talent.

Oh, you gotta-- Josh?

Our CFO believes that Josh is going to play an important role-Josh.

- in our company's future. - Really? What role is that?

- Yes, really. - King of the stupid universe?

It is an outrage.

That's all. It's...

They're making a huge, huge mistake.

Let's see Josh replace these people.

Let's see Josh find another Stanley.

You think Stanleys grow on trees? Well, they don't.

There is no Stanley tree.

Do you think the world is crawling with Phyllises?

Show me that farm.

With Phyllises and Kevins sprouting up

all over the place, ripe for the plucking.

Show me that farm.

Pictures. Memories.

Look at that. They grow up so fast.

- Hey, stranger. - Don't say that.

That just sounds weird. Please.

Sorry, I just feel like we haven't talked in a while.

Well, we have nothing to talk about, Dwight.

Just do your work.

While you still can.

When you become close with someone, you develop a kind of sixth sense.

You can read their moods like a book.

Right now, the title of Michael's book is

Something Weird Is Going On.

Colon: What Did Jan Say?

The Michael Scott Story.

By Michael Scott. With Dwight Schrute.

Hey, did you hear about your friends in Pennsylvania?

Really

Wow, that's too bad.

Sorry. Scranton branch is closing?

In your face.

Well, I work here now.

Sucka!

- Are you okay? -Yeah. Great, amazing.

Best physical condition of my life.

- What did Jan want? - Nothing. Just checking in.

I can't tell you, so.

- What can't you tell me? - Nothing. Pam.

What difference does it make? We'll all be gone in a few weeks anyway.

- What? -What?

- You just said that we're gonna be gone - Do I have any messages?

- Michael, what's going on? - Okay.

Listen up, everybody. I have some news.

We are screwed.

Dunder-Mifflin Scranton is being shut down.

Michael, We shouldn't be talking about this

until all the decisions have been made.

You knew about this all along, didn't you?

Jan told me just a few minutes before she told you.

Traitor. You are a traitor.

What about us, Michael? Do we still have jobs?

I don't know. Probably not.

This is the worst.

It makes perfect sense that it would happen today

because I just received this in the mail.

1,000 business cards with this address and phone number.

I don't want to blame anyone in particular.

I think everyone's to blame.

If I get to stay and Ryan is laid off,

I will kill myself.

Like Romeo and Juliet. The Claire Danes one.

Stamford Connecticut

Stamford Connecticut

I worked in Scranton for a really long time. And...

It's gonna be weird that it's all disappearing.

I mean, I always knew that the branch would shut down someday.

I just figured it would be because Michael...

sold the building for some magic beans.

I couldn't be happier.

I'm gonna take the severance and retire.

My wife and I are gonna travel.

I really couldn't be happier.

It's a blessing in disguise.

Actually, not even in disguise.

Sometimes at home, I answer the phone, "Dunder-Mifflin. This is Pam."

So...maybe that'll stop now.

What does that mean?

Well, some of us are fired,

and a few are going to Connecticut.

I don't know if I really wanna work here without Pam.

You know that Cinderella song?

You Don't Know What You Got Till It's Gone?

That pretty much says it better than how I know

how to say it in words.

Hey, Mike. Darrel. Noble Darrel.

Look, I heard about the office.

- tuff break??? - I know. I know

Well, I'll land on my feet.

- Yeah. Don't worry about me. - I wasn't.

So you'll be okay too. You're warrior, you're smart.

Capable. You'll find something else, and...

Actually, Bob Vance bought out the warehouse.

- So he's keeping on the whole crew. - So we're good.

Awesome.

This is my house.

The CFO's taking away my house and giving it to Josh.

And Josh is giving the garage to Bob Vance.

All right, listen up.

Some of you may have heard some rumors about the branch closing.

But I am not going to take this lying down.

I have a plan, and I am going to save our jobs.

So just hang in there. Let's go.

- Yes! - Oh, good. You're bringing Dwight.

Yes. This might get ugly. I'm gonna need backup.

-What's the plan? - Go to New York.

Confront the CFO. Show him he's making a mistake. Save the branch.

Can I drive? No way.

- Shotgun! - No, there's no one else.

Still.

Thank you very much. Okay.

Secretary says Wallace is away for the day.

and won't be coming back into the office.

Okay.

But... Do not worry.

I have his home address... Right here.

- Why? - Christmas card list.

You send him cards? You've never met him.

Well, when I do, we'll have something to talk about.

Hey, do you have a second? Sure, what's up?

I know it's not definite, or whatever, but

but, uh, do you know who's coming over here from Scranton?

I honestly don't. I don't know.

So is it, like, sales or accountants?

You know what, Jim? I wouldn't worry about it.

What does that mean?

- Hi. - Come in, hey.

Oh, good, you're both here.

Ready to talk logistics?

I just feel like it could have been something special

if we could have kept working together. But...

I'm gonna go someplace else, and you're gonna go someplace else.

It just doesn't make sense.

This kind of worked out perfectly for me.

I got some good experience.

Michael's gonna write me a great recommendation.

And as far as me and Kelly goes...

I think it's for the best.

Okay.

This is it.

This is exactly what Michael Moore does.

Famous documentarian.

He goes up to people with a camera,

and he's like, "Why did you do this?

"Why did you pollute? "You are bad. You're a bad person."

Very dramatic. Although I can't say I was a big fan

of Bowling For Columbine. Because I thought it was gonna be

a bowling movie. Like Kingpin.

And it wasn't. It was something else.

So.

Josh will be running what is now called Dunder-Mifflin Northeast,

which is all the offices north of Stamford.