The Kettles in the Ozarks

The Atlantic and Southern Pioneer leaving at 9:15.

Gate 4 is now open for Pullman and coach passengers.

(WHISTLES) Come on!

Your attention, please.

Come on, kids.

The Saint Louis Flyer now arriving on Track 8.

Oh!

Who did that? I don't know, Ma. What's the matter?

Stop him! Stop him!

Stop Danger!

Get him! Hold him. Stop him.

Stop him! Help her!

Oh, no! Stop him!

Oh, help her!

Stop him!

Your attention, please.

You shouldn't have oughta done that, Danger.

Ma, are you all right? The Arkansas Argonaut

leaving on Track 16 at 9:00.

That's us. Get me on my feet, kids.

The Arkansas Argonaut leaving on Track 16 at 9:00.

This is the last call.

I'll take Danger.

AW, gee, Ma!

Since I bought the tickets, I'd like to ride to the Ozarks,

not run to them.

Just can't ride facing front. Makes me dizzy.

Oh! Oh!

Sorry, mister. I'm Ma Kettle.

Pleased to meet you.

Unharness yourselves, kids.

Be little ladies and gentlemen.

Find places to sit.

Here, Ma.

Come out here.

Oh, I'll take Jenny.

How's Jenny, Ma?

She's a good traveler.

No animals in the car.

Absolutely no animals allowed.

That dog must go.

Now that's all right. You can keep a bird in a cage

as long as it's covered, but absolutely no animals.

The dog will have to ride in the baggage car.

Oh, Ma!

It's the rules!

Could you put this up here, please?

A chicken's a bird. Ain't it?

Sit down, Janie.

Sure have to cart a lot of stuff

travelling with 13 kids.

So long, Danger.

We're going to Mournful Hollow. That's in Arkansas.

We're gonna visit my husband's brother, Sedgewick Kettle.

He lives on a farm.

It's a nice, big place.

Sedgewick and Pa, that's my husband,

they was willed it by their father.

But Sedge runs it.

Not very good though. Janie!

Wouldn't you like to sit with the other kids, Janie?

No, Ma.

The bank man wrote Ma and Pa a letter.

He wants to take Uncle Sedge's farm away.

That's why we're going to Mournful Hollow.

Financial matters get in such a mess,

but I figure I can straighten things out,

and me and the kids will put that farm

on a paying basis in no time.

Pa's staying home to look after our house in town,

and the farm in Cape Flattery.

Real responsibility having two places.

Pa started to grow a peanut crop this year.

Of course, Geoduck and Crowbar will do all the work.

Pa watches them do it.

Pa's kind of delicate like.

He ain't able to do too much.

The bank says Uncle Sedge doesn't do much either.

That's why they want to take his farm away.

Sedge must be sick, is what Janie means.

Tickets. Tickets, please.

Ma's got 'em. She's there.

Oh.

Well, are you all in the same family?

How many of you are there?

Sixteen.

Six... Sixteen?

And who's the youngest?

He is.

And how old are you, little man?

Six and a half.

Six and a half.

Oh! There it is!

Tickets, please.

Tickets?

They're here someplace.

Those are mine, Ma.

I knew they weren't mine.

Well, I put 'em in here. I... I know I did.

Where'd they get to?

Oh, here they are. All 14 of 'em.

Shouldn't there be 16?

No, just four full fares.

For me and Nancy, and Freddie, and Betty.

No, she's half fare.

She won't be 12 till November.

It's Johnny who... No, Ma. Johnny's nine.

One moment!

May I ask how many children you have?

Sure. Sixteen.

And you bought 14 tickets?

Yes. For me and 13 kids.

Why should I buy tickets for Tom and Rose and Elwin?

Are they under five?

Ha! Of course not! They're the oldest.

Well, then, why didn't you buy tickets for them?

'Cause they didn't come with us.

Now, uh...

Ma! It's raining!

What in tarnation is that?

I guess Billy must've brought Oscar.

Oscar got out of the bottle.

I thought Oscar stayed home with Pa.

I've got him.

Oh, excuse me. I... I thought I had Oscar.

I'll get him, Ma.

I'll get him!

I never should've left home.

Sedge or no Sedge.

You comfortable, Sedge?

Well, you might fluff up the feathers just a little, Bedelia.

Mmm-hmm.

Mighty much obliged to you.

You are extremely awkward.

I think Small Fry could use some help.

Bedelia!

Howdy, Bancroft.

Howdy.

Big Trout's gonna kill off that corn sure enough,

putting them dead fish in the ground like that.

Big Trout knows what he's about.

Thank you, Sedgewick.

My people taught corn-raising

to Myles Standish and John Alden at Plymouth Rock.

Maybe that's the way they do it in them foreign places,

but it ain't the Ozark way.

This corn will be good enough to sell for seed, Sedgewick.

Hmm.

Ain't gonna do you much good,

if'n the bank takes over your place.

That's right un-neighborly of you, Bancroft Baines.

Me being your sister's intended.

Never mind him, Sedgewick.

Let us hope the bank holds off until harvest time.

If I could just give 'em a little bit on account.

Perhaps your wealthy sister-in-law will lend you the money

when she arrives.

Oh, I don't like to take advantage of my kinfolk,

but I'll think of something.

Certainly you will.

That corn ain't no good for seed.

Big Trout's crazy!

But, Bancroft, it is the finest corn in Mournful Hollow.

Fine thing!

My own sister what lives off of me, taking sides agin' me!

Come on! You got the milking and the washin' to do.

'Sides, you ain't done the plowing yet.

Sun's moved, Small Fry.

Howdy, mister.

Well, why the galoshes on a goose?

Well, the eggs got mixed up,

and Gertie was hatched by a hen.

Chickens don't like to get their feet wet,

and Gertie is even fussier.

Them galoshes make her happy.

Is that your cornfield?

Yep. Right nice, ain't it?

Looks like a good crop.

I'm Jack Dexter of the International Development Company of America.

Well, I'm Sedgewick Kettle of Mournful Hollow.

Just call me Sedge.

Mighty glad to make your acquaintance.

Well, I don't mind if I do.

You got a match?

I travel around the country,

buying up crops in the field.

Before harvesting?

Well, if the weather turns bad and the crop spoils,

the farmer gets his money just the same.

Must be mighty nice fellers, doing things like that.

We have to protect ourselves, of course.

The farmer signs an agreement

to do all he can to ensure a good yield.