Find Yourself (Zi Shen Shao Nv De Chu Lian / 资深少女的初恋)

There was once a stubborn donkey

which only headed south.

In the south, there was a wall.

The donkey hit it and died.

Is this what happened to you in your past life?

My relationship has been exposed.

They are angry at me.

Don't add fuel to the fire.

Dad and Mom like Ye Luming a lot.

Can't you tell them some other time?

Do you know how to kill a whale?

What? A whale? Just use a gun.

A speargun.

No, electrocute it.

Why?

You just have to keep throwing plastic into the sea.

It will consume the plastic

just like how it consumes food.

As time passes,

slowly,

its stomach will be full of undigested plastic.

Then it will gradually die.

Do you have a fever?

Canyang.

I've kept the truth from them for too long.

To me,

lying is like a whale consuming plastic.

It's a slow suicide.

It doesn't matter if I'm lying to myself or others.

The pain will only get stronger.

But you can't tell them now. Dad is ill.

But it's the best time to tell Dad now.

-Look-- -The tomatoes are great today.

They must be organic.

Fanxing, you're awake.

Hey.

Isn't that our neighbor?

-Why is he in our house? -That's enough.

Fanxing.

There's porridge. Go and eat some.

We'll have roasted fish tonight.

Dad, Mom.

I have something to tell you.

In the end, you still broke up?

We noticed something was off.

I just thought

that since you've never liked anyone before,

both of you should get together first

as Luming is handsome and nice.

As time passes, feelings would develop.

Like your dad and me.

We met because of a friend.

Back then, I chose him because he was nice.

Enough with our story.

That was during our generation.

Just let them be.

They are not destined to be together.

If you do meet someone you like...

I already have.

He Fanxing.

The person I like is--

He Fanxing, don't go too far!

You have already broken up.

Dad, Mom.

I'm sorry I kept this from you.

Actually,

I was with Yuan Song before.

Are you crazy?

-Canyang! -How could you tell them?

Can't you take it slow?

You're so selfish.

Canyang, let go!

-Let go! -Let go!

I'm sorry, He Canyang.

I didn't mean to anger them.

I just can't forget Yuan Song.

Canyang! Can't you talk nicely?

Do you have to hit her?

He Canyang!

What are you doing?

You hit her before she said anything!

Who taught you that?

Are you trying to make me mad?

You're just biased.

Yuan Song is so much younger than her.

What did Mrs. Wang call Fang Shanshan?

She called her...

-shameless. -Shut up!

What about Fang Shanshan?

What about your sister?

What about being shameless?

If you think that she's shameless,

what about you and Cai Minmin?

I'm a man!

It's fine for me to get a younger partner. No one will say a thing!

But she's a woman! How is it the same?

So what if she's a woman?

What's so different?

Tell me!

Is the law against it?

Fine.

Are you saying it's okay for her to be with Yuan Song?

Why not?

Both of them are single.

It's not adultery.

Do you want to know what being shameless is?

Look at Shen Fanfan!

Fine.

I wish for He Fanxing and Yuan Song to be together again.

Anyhow, you're just being biased.

Get out of here!

Don't come to our house again!

You...

This boy, Canyang...

Hey.

Why are you laughing?

Didn't you hear what he said?

If Fanxing gets back with Yuan Song,

will you be fine with it?

Dad, Mom.

I'm sorry.

Come, sit here.

Tell us.

What's going on?

Before Ye Luming,

I actually dated Yuan Song for a while.

He was my first boyfriend.

My first love.

But I had too many concerns about us.

So I kept it a secret,

in case you would be embarrassed.

Then we broke up.

So I thought there wasn't a need to say it.

If you still like Yuan Song,

why did you date Luming?

Aren't you playing with his feelings?

His sister even came to our house.

Anyone would have thought that you two were getting along well

and planning to get married.

I wanted to.

After Dad fell sick,

I really wanted to get married.

So that Dad would be at ease.

I tried my best.

Every day, I felt

so exhausted inside.

I hate myself for not being able to compromise

like everyone else.

But why can't I just be different from others?

Why can't I be different?

Fanxing.

Being different

is exhausting.

Haven't you always wanted a simple life?

That's right.

But no matter what we choose,

life is never simple.

We have to bear the consequences

of our own choices.

Since you have thought it through,

then I

will say no more.

I'm tired.

I'm going to get some rest.

How do you want the yellow corvina cooked?

What?

Didn't you say that I was biased?

I bought your favorite yellow corvina.

Do you want it grilled or steamed?

Grilled.

Mom, is Dad--

Thank you, Mom.

The door is opened.

You hung up on me!

That's why I'm calling you now.

Were you never going to call me if I never called you?

Why would I not?

But you're doing it right now!

This is too much!

I will never forgive you!

Okay, I'm sorry.

Where are you right now?

I'll make it up to you.

I'm outside your house!

Why are you smiling?

Are you here to dump me?

What?

No.

I thought you'd never forgive me.

I said it out of anger.

It's not that I'll never forgive you.

You have to apologize. That will do.

I'm sorry.

Is...

Is that all?

Isn't saying "sorry" an apology?

Or do you want me to ask for a flogging?

No.

Did you stand long? Are you tired?

No, I just arrived.