Hawthorne

Ic this hour on wbma.

Man: Thanks, Jim.

Sir! Sir!

The cancer center's down the hall.

I was just trying to help the girl out. Mm-hmm.

They don't know each other?

She would have caught cold!

I know.

I'm so sorry.

Hey. What are you doing here in enemy territory?

Well, I have a meeting with Gail.

Are they poison?

Well, I figure we'll be going a couple of rounds,

So hopefully her blood sugar will crash.

Gail's diabetic.

Oh.

Any bear claws?

Seeing as she's my boss in the E.R.,

Could you please make it work out with her?

I will try,

But most likely we're gonna both end up on gurneys.

Woman on p.A.: I.V. Nurse, call extension 9786.

I.V. Nurse, extension 97...

Gail: All right. Okay. Goodbye.

My office.

This ain't gonna be good.

I know you're worried about passing

The joint-commission inspection.

Actually, I'm not.

I feel like, if we put our heads together, we'll pass.

Well, what do you propose?

Well, there's a procedure to improve patient safety

And increase efficiency in the E.R.

It's known as sbar -- situation, background...

Assessment, and recommendation.

We tried it, and it didn't fly.

Well, you know, sometimes when you're putting in new processes,

It takes a minute to get things running smoothly --

What else you got?

What about lean? It's a process for admitting.

Another swing and miss.

We gonna be here a minute.

You want some coffee?

Yeah, how about I'm gonna get us some coffee?

Valerie Dayton, 39, collapsed dropping her kids off at school.

Low-grade fever, b.P. 100 over 60.

Trauma one. Hi, ladies.

Steve: Mrs. Dayton, can you hear me okay?

Are you experiencing any pain?

my chest is tight.

Okay, let's get an EKG and a chest X-ray.

Bobbie: Do you have any allergies?

Have you taken any medications, any drugs?

Hey, Bobbie, are these her girls?

Yeah. Okay.

Excuse me, young man.

Marcus.

Marcus. Nice to meet you.

Can you call a volunteer from upstairs

To come and get these beautiful girls?

Yeah. No problem.

Okay, we're gonna do the best we can to take care of your mommy,

But right now, I'm gonna make sure you guys are taken care of.

How about some juice and coloring books?

Okay?

We set? On my count.

1, 2, 3.

O.R. Room three...

I'm sorry, you look very familiar.

Were you a patient at trinity at some point?

Last year.

I had a heart valve replaced.

That's right. I remember. Mitral valve.

Okay, in that case, let's get an echo, as well.

Listen, I just want you to know,

I'm gonna have a volunteer come take care of your girls, okay?

Please, can't they just stay here?

I wish they could, but I can't have kids in the patient area.

They'll be fine. They're in good hands, I promise.

And if you have any other questions,

Ask one of these guys to find me.

All right? Take care.

Thank you.

What are you doing?

I'm just taking some blood.

See if you're pregnant --

You don't need to worry about that.

Tox screen.

You don't need to worry about that, either.

They're just routine.

Christina: Instituting a fast-track for suture removal

And basic follow-up would cut wait times in half.

That means dedicating an exam room.

I don't have space for that.

Come on, Gail, really? Is it gonna be like this?

I mean, there's c.N.O.S all over the country

Implementing these procedures.

Those nurses wear suits, not scrubs.

So, you mean to tell me you have a problem

With the title "chief nursing officer"?

Don't you think the title "director of nursing"

Is a little archaic?

It puts us below the c.F.O., the c.E.O. --

I didn't order alphabet soup.

And I'm not about to let some stranger from a failed hospital

Start meddling with my E.R.

If we don't pass this inspection,

Your E.R. Will be shut down.

Hello. I'm doctor Hyun.

Calling in another doctor -- that can't be a good sign.

Mitral valve was replaced last year.

It appears to have become infected.

Paul: Ah, she's got some regurgitation,

But no sign of congestive heart failure.

That's good, right?

not exactly.

Your valve will eventually fail.

You'll need another replacement.

If it's an infection,

Why can't you just give me some antibiotics?

We will, but the valve is already damaged,

And those things don't get better -- they get worse.

Have you been exposed to someone in a high-risk situation?

Steve: Sick kids in your daughter's class, perhaps?

No need to delay.

We need to schedule an mvr right away. Okay.

I don't have any insurance.

That's tomorrow's problem.

Be back in a minute.

Hey, dot. Who's next?

We got a kid with a hard-on that won't quit.

Excuse me?

Priapism.

Oh, dear.

Marcus, I need an open exam.

Marcus: There are none.

But, uh, give me a second.

Dr. Dietrich to the CTU.

Dr. Dietrich to the CTU.

Best we can do at the moment.

You can't put my grandson on display like a county fair.

I told you we should have taken him to the pediatrician.

Dad, his doctor wouldn't be able to see him

Till later this afternoon.

It's been too long as it is.

How long has it been, exactly?

He's been this way -- erect -- all night.

Somebody shoot me.

Have you sustained any injuries?

Does scarred for life count?

I've treated a couple kids who have experimented

With that ecstasy-viagra combination.

A little bit of that stuff goes a long way.

He would never do that.

Has anything like this ever happened before?

No, never.

A couple of times.

It always went away on its own.

He masturbates.

For cryin' out loud, Jo Ellen.

The nurse needs to know.

Has r.J.'s father ever experienced

Anything like this before?

No, h-he's, uh...

I'm adopted. ...He's adopted.

What do you know about the birth parents?

They're perfectly healthy.

You better have the records sent over

From the adoption agency just in case.

You make the call. I'll stay here with him.

I'll be right back.

Kid really wants to lose his erection,

You should show him a picture of my 80-year-old neighbor, Ada,

Pruning her rose garden in the nude.

I like a girl who's a free spirit.

Mm. You'd like her more in a bra and knickers, trust me.

I'm already dreading spring.

Christina: Hey, Bobbie.

What's this?

14-year-old with priapism.

Oh, he's got to be in a lot of pain.

I know. A constant biggie.

I don't know which is worse -- the pain or the humiliation.

I'd want to crawl under a rock.

Some men would pay a lot for that particular problem.

None that you know, I'm sure.

Yeah. Okay.

Hello, I'm Christina Hawthorne, director of nursing.

Hi.

Why don't we get you upstairs

Into a private room in peds, okay?

We still haven't seen a doctor.

Here's doctor Shaw. I'll get that room ready.

Oh, good. Thank you.

Steve: Hello, mate.

So, how long has this been going on for?

Several hours, you said?

Well, the first thing I think we should try is, uh, icing.

Unfortunately for him,

We have some special packs which are in the shape of doughnut.