Constantin And Elena (Constantin si Elena)

Bucharest 2008

I don't wanna kick the bucket too soon,

but as long as I'm staying here,

I'll be a drunkard and a bastard. 'Scuse me...

Has anything ever hit you in the head?

No, but it almost has. A woman got hit with a crust of bread,

hard as concrete... Like that bottle over there.

Good think you've asked me, sonny! That woman should tell you.

You should have had that on film! One more step, and...

No, sonny, I had enough.

A film by Alexander Nanau

Mr. Popescu, on my word of honor, I'm not crazy, I'm sober...

I was dumb enough to drink some brandy.

I'm leaving all my works to you, just take me out of there.

Okay, but don't worry...

We'll have a normal artist-gallery owner relationship.

THE WORLD ACCORDING TO ION B.

By Barladeanu, 1972.

Works and everything...

- Ion, "trash can"! Wake up! - Shit...

These dustmen have never come so early...

Open the dumpster, Ion. Give it here.

Open the dumpster.

During communism, you couldn't do anything, sonny.

I think you weren't even born. Sorry... How old were you in '83?

- 4. - Well...

When you were my age, how did you imagine life?

I didn't believe in anything, I thought I was immortal.

I was handsome. I was a sort of.. Have you heard of Rudolph Valentino?

Do you know why I am in such a state? Because of my brothers,

my parents and my mother I have a brother in the country.

If you see him, he hasn't read a book in all of his life.

I've read a few things. I'll tell you about Chekov.

When I read Chekov... I had found a booklet.

You know, a great Russian writer... He wrote "Ward No. 6".

I was put in an institution once, it was a mistake.

Some assholes put me in there.

He was sleeping here, on the stairs.

Our super got pity of him, and took him in here.

Many of us were... They told him "why did you bring him here?"

and others were... And he said something like

"some keep dogs..., animals, I'll keep a human being,

why is it bothering you?"

I met him when I came here, almost 30 years ago.

I found him here. He was alone, he had no family.

In time, I found that he had come from somewhere in Moldova.

He had run away from home.

I'm from Vaslui, Zapodeni County. Za-po-deni.

You recording me?

My father was a Stalinist. I'm a self educated man.

Now I'm just "bottle-educated". Sorry, sonny...

Come here... Tigress, come here, girl.

Mr. Alex, I hit her sometimes, but she's still coming back.

I met him by sheer miracle.

On the 1st of December, last year, in 2007, on Romania's National Day.

Ovidiu Fenes, one of my artists, came to the gallery.

He seemed possessed "come with me, I've got something to show you".

There are about 900 collages, that cover some sort of..

They cover everything from the 70s to the mid 90s.

And everything is... It's a well rounded work of art.

It's any gallery owner's Graal.

Why did you make all these clippings for?

For the collages.

Do you know how much I enjoy cutting them?

But I also like to tum them into collages.

Cutting things is very hard work.

During one single night, I can cut as many as in this heap here.

Where from? Do you buy the magazines, or...?

I used to buy them, now people just throw them in the garbage.

Belmondo, when he was young.

This one is from "Il Gattopardo". Burt Lancaster.

This one is a Rock singer, Prince. And this is Liz Taylor.

I wanted to be an actor. I had the calling.

Only a man that knows what the secret life is,

can be in the movies. But now I'm a director.

I've only later realized that the most important is the director.

Get it? Elia Kazan was a Turk who went to America.

That's it! Stop!

I could've done the same thing, but not as beautifully as he has.

But, you know, only few really acknowledge his talent.

So, the right people don't know. Listen, I'm going...

- Where should I put the money? - Here, in the...

- You won't lose it, right? - Thanks and bless you.

I don't understand what you want from him, really...

- He's a very good artist. - Maybe.

But he has no ID, no nothing. He's been here for 22 years.

They took him in out of pity and it's been 5-6 years now.

Nobody put him to work. The super wanted to set him up

with an employment record, so that he could have

a retirement fund. He refused it.

You've asked me, I've answered. He's a great artist!

What can one do with a drunkard who, most of the time,

doesn't even know he's own name?

You'll see, ma'am... Come to the gallery.

May God make him stop drinking. Do as you think fit.

Wow, you're all dressed up! A real dandy!

I don't want the neighbors to see me.

One of his problems was the place he was living in.

I've found him a studio where he could live like normal people do.

The yellow one. So this is it: Red, yellow and blue.

Starting from here, okay? Red, yellow and blue, just like...

Don't lose the keys!

I'll be here for two more weeks. I'm really cleaning the place up.

- Why two more weeks? - Well, 'cause... last night I...

C'mon, pops! Turn around! Al Capone...

I'm neither Andreea Marin, nor Raduleasca.

I'm Ion Barladeanu, collage director.

Ion, first of all, you have to tell me,

roughly, at least... When did you make them? 1990...

Oh... I can't remember, I'll estimate it.

Yeah, estimate it. '90-'91.

If I had know there was gonna be an exhibition, I'd have signed them.

Before... Last century, I mean... I'd have never written my whole name.

- I'd have put only '89, '80... - Yes, exactly like that.

'82.

- Do you like this cardboard? - Yes.

- It needs... - No, don't write your name there!

I don't, I just wanna cover it up a little bit.

Now it's hard to write my name, it has to be on the line.

If I had a rubber stamp, I wouldn't work myself so hard.

It's better this way.

Many people have asked me about this timber here.

I just measure it. I failed math, but I'm pretty good with geometry.

There are more dots over there, and less over here.

But I start at the centre, so that it'd look

like a real classroom. And these are in pen, glued together.

Here we have a Nazi Chaplin. This is the real Brigitte Bardot.

- Really? - Really.

This is "Gogu's Revenge".

This one wanted to shoot him with the Mauser.

The Germans had this gun during the war.

The guy in jeans wanted to shoot Gogu on the sauerkraut keg.

But look at Gogu's precision. Hadn't he thrown the axe in time,

he'd be dead, that's for sure! Bang!

Lino Ventura, Steve McQueen, Mircea Albulescu, Mircea Diaconu.

- This one is a French actor. - Unbelievable...

At first, this was a drawing and then...

This one is taken from a Turkish newspaper.

He's a "squint-eyed", the quack! The way he's holding the cigarette!

I've been in this neighborhood for more than 25 years.

I still had my hair...

If I'm going back to my village, I won't even know my own folks,

it's like I've been born here.

I've lived in that building for 22 years.

- Why did you leave? - Well, they threw my out.

- Why? - I was aggressive...

I'll tell you about it, but some other time. Not now...

I've framed about 16 of them.

He's the king of the magazines.

He's been gathering stuff, so he has enough to keep on working.

As far as I understood, he hasn't made anything in 10 years.

After all these years, I wanna make somethin' new.

I don't wanna get rich, I only want the bare essentials.

But I'd really like one of those basic bikes...

What did you fear the most in your life?

Ceausescu! Can't you see how much I love him?

In '79-'80, I started hating the communists.

They put me in jail 'cause a grave digger denounced me.

I was digging graves without a permit.

I can still dig a grave. You don't need a degree for that.

Those in Bucharest treated me as if I was an international criminal.

There was a captain Tamas. A moron, with capital "M".

He was in charge of the collectivization

in Zapodeni County, just like my father, before him.

They were mates. And he said: "You, rascal,

you've ashamed your father!

You'll spent 3 months in jail!"

Everything was very strict. The smart ones had left the country.

For years, I've earned my living with the shovel, like a nitwit.

And it wasn't only me... There were engineers, too,

doing all the hard work How am I not to like Ceausescu?

These are my movies. You really think

they'll love me for them? They'll be envious!

- People? - Some of the artists.

Many will ask me about my studies.

Well, I have 7 school years, two trade schools

and I repeated one year. For 16 months I've been in the army,

for 3 in jail and, for the rest, I've learned on my own.

This is my university education.

Gimme 10 Cotidian paper...

Thanks...

"Ion Barladeanu, the Forefather of Pop Art".

Can you explain it to me? What's "Pop Art"?

It's a contemporary art genre which appeared in the 60s,

at the ending of the 60s, both in England and America.

There were some guys...

- You must have heard of Andy Warhol. - Not really!

Communism used to cut off access to information,

especially that concerning American art,

considered to be degenerate art. Get it?

So... I really have to cut my hair today...

- And does he get paid? - Don't cut more than 3 cm.

- Shall I trim the eyebrows, too? - No!

in a dumpster... Making an out of garbage.

Mr. Dan took care of me. Talent is ignored in Romania.

Doctor...

Socialist working-class hero.

From the dumpster straight to the gallery!

- Who's in this picture here? - You are.

Let me show you one more...